A Well-Reasoned Argument

UPDATE: This comic was somehow turned into a shirt by space wizards with laser swords!

CHECK IT OUT IN THE STORE!

Ewok Stare Shirt

This idea has been stuck in my brain hole for a couple of months. I had to purge it lest I spend another night waking up in cold sweats screaming, “THE EWOKS! THEY ARE LIKE CARE BEARS! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! I CAN TASTE INSANITY AND IT TASTES LIKE SUNNY D!”

So, enjoy if you can. Otherwise wait and there will be another comic in it’s place eventually.

Here’s some news about the new Jedi-Free “Star Wars” TV Show.

UPDATE: There’s a desktop based on this comic in The Vault now

hijinks-ensue-ewok-stare-1920x1200

Donate then Download Here

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45 Comments

  1. I think that that was the end to the super retouched "Mega Ultimate Super Ultra Edition" that came out a few years back. It also shows the Emperor as a kid. Really good stuff.

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  2. Now THAT would be an awesome shirt…Care Ewoks destroying the Death Star through WUV!

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    • and wallpaper. the vault is begging for a new one.

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    • ITS A TRAP! Those Ewoks are fully operational!

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  3. This begs the question: What other 80s shows tie can be used to substitute the Star Wars universe?

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    • Well, obviously Splinter is a hairy Obi-Wan and the ninja turtles represent Luke's mood swings.

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      • …or you mean they represent how he was four times as bitchy as the average teenager? Yeah, I can buy that.

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        • Well, Leonardo is his stuck up goody two shoes attitude.
          Raphael is his at his angst-iest.
          Michaelangelo is how he used to act with Biggs.
          And Donatello is that one time he fixed R2D2.

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  4. Haha. Joel you're being too hard on yourself, this is hilarious.

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  5. The comic is great, but it's Joel's expression in the last panel that's absofuckinglutely marvelously perfect. Much as I love your annoyed-Joel avatar, this is now my favorite Joelface in all of Hijinksity.

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    • I think "absofuckinglutely" should be a real word. That's fantastic. Someone contact Oxford.

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      • Had you not heard that before? I wish I had made it up. Not sure when I first heard this version, but the 1956 musical My Fair Lady uses "abso-bloomin'-lutely" in a song lyric.

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        • And Babylon 5 used "absofrakinlutely"

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          • or was it "absolfragginlutely"?

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      • Had you not heard that before? I wish I had made it up. Not sure when I first heard this version, but the 1956 musical My Fair Lady uses "abso-bloomin'-lutely" in a song lyric.

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  6. Teddy Bear Stare!

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  7. Inspired idea! And I'm with Eli.

    I really like how the explosion (and the way the trees) was drawn. It looks so… organic, like watercolor on paper. Didn't know you could do that with a digital pen :)

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  8. That is one gorgeous Care Ewok induced explosion.

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  9. Death Star explode! Yub Yub!

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    • I just realized how much Ewok I know. Echah Wah wah

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  10. It's really not a surprise when you consider how much evil power the Care Bears wielded. Remember the clues in their movie? No? http://is.gd/1phQx (link via @micheleboyd)

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    • I think I just died laughing after reading your link

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  11. …..And Dark Heart is Darth Vader.

    HOLY CRAP, IT ALL MAKES SENSE!

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    • Care Bears would have kicked ass if Dark Heart actually had been Darth Vader…..although the show would have been over after the first episode slaughter of all the care bears.

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  12. How about we reserve judgement on this new STAR WARS show until we see athe 1st episode, or @ least a more detailed preview? But yeah, ewoks are just too cute.
    Joel, I like how u said Insanity tastes like SunnyD. Maybe it was just for you, because mine tastes like A1 steak sauce! I shudder to think of the evil Care Bears are capable of. What would Stephen Colbert say about that?

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  13. I really wished there had been more Ewok dismemberment in Jedi. Blaster holes in their little furry chests. OMG their bleeding rainbow everywhere, get a tourniquet! MEDIC!!

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  14. Is there a way you can put Papa Smurf in Star Wars as well? And maybe My Little Pony…? Pleeeeeeeeease?

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    • Papa Smurf is Obi-Wan

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    • What about replacing the tauntauns with my little ponies.

      Maybe the smell would better on the inside.

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  15. Personally I think the Care Bears are overdue for an update themselves. For our more media-savvy and cynical age, I suggest the "Like-I-Care" Bears.

    I'll be Snarky Bear. Who else is with me?

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    • Ever seen Bear Nuts? 😉
      It's pretty similar.

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  16. I would buy a t-shirt that was based on panels 1 & 2.

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  17. I swear to God that when I saw this, I started freaking out and calling my friend so I could be like "Lucas is making some fucking stupid change to the end of RotJ!!!" And then I realized it was just you having a laugh.

    Scary, though, that the scenario seems so plausible…

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  18. I would as well.

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  19. This dovetails quite nicely with my own theory that the Care Bears were LSD dealers. Think about it, they do a countdown and all of a sudden bright lights are everywhere. I've held onto this for years and only shared it with a trusted few. But with this, the time has come to spread the word.

    Care Bears love acid.

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  20. I laughed so hard at this comic that my husband came in the room to see what was wrong. He didn't get it.

    Every one of your strips I want to send to someone but I can never think of anyone that has the right variety of geekiness. Apparently I need new friends.

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  21. Brilliant! Talk about implanting false memories! I wonder how many of us will now remember it this way?

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  22. Question, How long has it been since that show was first announced? and why does anyone care about it anymore?

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    • Question, How long has it been since this comic was first posted? And why do you care about it anymore?

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      • I could ask you the same thing. Be nice. Thats the only rule.

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  23. omg, epic! the ewoks, insanity, sounds very much coming from this! yeah, they do look abit like care bears 😛

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  24. Personally I always thought they were more like Gummi Bears…

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  25. I just watched this for the first time this weekend (I know, don’t judge) and that was my first thought when this happened 😛 Great minds, I tell ya!

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