Guest Comic By Alina Pete of Weregeek

“Winter Is Coming” shirts are now IN THE STORE!!! [based on this comic]

NYCC Guest Week concludes all over your face! Massive impact crater! EXTINCTION LEVEL EVENT!

Thanks to all the Fancy Bastards that came out to NYCC. Since I am writing this the night before I leave for New York, I am assuming that non of you mugged and or murdered me. You know the old saying, “New York: The city so nice, they murdered you twice.” Regular comics of some sort (possibly LoFi or photo-based) will resume sometime tomorrow (Tuesday).

Alina Pete of Weregeek has the honorable distinction of (along with NYCC Guest Week Alumnus Sam Logan) of being one of the 4 or 5 Canadians I know. Unlike Sam, who has perfected a nearly (suspiciously) perfect American accent, save for the occasional stray “aboot,” Alina, being neither a spy or ashamed of her heritage, has a very cute Frost Elf (pardon my racial epithet) way of speaking which I find ADORABLE!

Alina makes a comic about geeks and nerds that play tabletop/roleplaying games along with other geekery, and nerdish leanings. I know that subject matter is very near and dear to many a Fancy Bastard, and I know I am not sufficiently catering to your needs in that area. Occaisionally I will repeat something I heard Wil Wheaton say about “rolling” and “dice bags” and “critical hits” or whatever, and that’s about the extent of my knowledge. Alina is here to SAVE YOU weary traveller! She has jokes that YOU will UNDERSTAND with your BRAINS and HEADS! SHOUTING! Also, one time she drew me in the background of one of her comics, which nearly excuses her putting me in a “David Willis shirt”. WILLLLLLLIIISSSSSSSSS! #nemesis

Funny enough, had I been making comics this week, I probably would have made this one. I find it really arrogant and uninformed that dozens of political cartoonists depicted Steve Jobs getting all buddy buddy with St. Peter. I don’t believe in Heaven or Nirvana (though I really enjoyed “Unplugged In New York”), but I still find it disrespectful to portray Steve Jobs in a religious manor contradictory to his beliefs. Of course I don’t really expect much from “modern” political cartoonists. They literally LABEL EVERYTHING so you fully understand beyond a shadow of a doubt why you aren’t laughing.

COMMENTERS: Using the standard tropes of political cartoons, come up with a better (by which I mean worse) comic to commemorate jobs in the dozens, if not tens of newspapers that are still in circulation. How about Steve Jobs as baby new year in a top hat that says “Steve Jobs,” and the Grim Reaper as the Statue of Liberty standing next to a pig that says “Big Oil” and a business man smoking a cigar that says “Iran” across his chest. A fitting tribute if there ever was one.

Also, how about that fucking panel 3 up there, huh? Jesus H. Chr… I mean, Alan H. Moore, that’s some serious shit. I might be so inclined as to turn that into a mobile wallpaper. First one of you to get that masterpiece tattooed on your back gets a lolly.

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29 Comments

  1. Panel 3 is ridiculawesome.

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  2. …this only ensures that when the day comes that Neil Gaimin passes away, the three newspaper editorial cartoonists that remain better show him being escorted off by the Endless version of Death.

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    • …Gaiman. Shit. Lousy place for a typo.

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    • Zing.

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  3. I think we broke the weregeek website!

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    • I came here to say that. Looks like we killed it.

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      • Damn you WIIIIILLLLLIIIISSSSS!!!!!! … oh wait, wrong one ….. Damn you Fancy Bastards!!!!!!
        More likely just broke her hosting service.
        Anybody out there willing to lend some bandwidth or a server or get on Rogers case?

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  4. Well, if movies have taught me anything, it's that the Buddhist afterlife is pretty much like Groundhog Day. So the only way to help Steve move on is to get him to fall in love with Andie Macdowell. Or maybe it was Chris Elliott. I don't know, it's been a long time since I watched it. The point is: gophers on golf courses is hillarious, especially when you're immortal, so someone needs to send Steve a copy of whatever movie I'm thinking of.

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    • Cady Shack was that name of that particular piece of history. Still lol at the Oh-Henry Bar incident when everyone else gets grossed out.

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      • I thought it was a Babe Ruth bar…

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  5. The last panel was indeed amazeballs.

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  6. The best political cartoon joke I've heard came from my husband, and it's a lot damn funnier than most political cartoons. Pretty easy to draw, too.

    "I guess the Republicans are right, Obama's presidency IS a Jobs-killer."

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  7. Damned glad our fair city left you free of stab holes, and hope your Con was a merry one. Many thanks again for my "The Doctor Meets Doc Brown" sketch. It is currently adorning the wall of my cubicle cell to my left and drawing the jealous gasps of threes, literally threes, of my coworkers.

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    • I read that too fast & thought "The Doctor Meets DAN Brown". If that happened in an episode the whole thing would consist of The Doctor just pointing and laughing,as he does to all "Archeologists"!

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  8. I like this comic a lot, but it's a bit hypocritical to complain Jobs is being incorrectly depicted in Heaven, then show Alan Moore in some kind of Hell.
    Alan Moore isn't a Christian (or a follower of any form of organised religion) either…
    5 seconds using Google would tell you that, if you didn't already know he created a weird-as-fuck religion of his own involving snakes: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cam2kK7J_8k

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    • Hence the picture of the weird snake thing in the not hell where he is. Seriously complaining about something when the thing that you want is actually the thing that exists is pretty silly. Unless you're being ironic?

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  9. Um… Alan Moore is clearly NOT in Christian Hell… at least, the tropes don't seem to be there (no fire, devils, pitchforks, etc). It looks like he's at some kind of freaky variation of the "pearly gate" with a bizarre snake god-thing. I think the whole point of the joke IS his" weird-as-fuck religion involving snakes", as you say. You were perhaps confused by the reference to "From Hell", which is a comic Alan Moore did in the 90s.

    You might want to give things a second look before you accuse people of hypocrisy. Just sayin'.

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    • It didn't register as a snake with me. For some reason i just thought it was a formless demon, with horns and tentacles. Guess I should pay more attention.

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  10. My understanding of the way "people" in the "media" "talk" leads me to believe that Christian Americans don't give a rat's ass what religion you believe in – they still think you're going to face their god and have to live up to their god's rules no matter what.

    So, it really shouldn't be insulting at all. Except maybe to Christian Americans who don't believe that.

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  11. Eh, I don't think anyone is trying to be offensive in any way. It's just the default "<INSERT NAME HERE> at Pearly Gates with St. Peter" trope that gets trotted out with any death of any famous person at all. The likelihood that quite a few of those cartoonists don't believe in any of the relevant theology themselves is fairly high.

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  12. Steve Jobs is shown in a turtle-necked loincloth, crucified with nails marked "icrosoft" and "oogle" on a cross topped with the Labarum of X-P as the initial letters of Xerox Parc, with a crown of thorns marked "Patent Suits". A Roman soldier with glasses with "BG" on his shield stabs a spear into his side, where a dotted outline of a pancreas is drawn (on the wrong side). Two soldiers: "Woz"and "Cook" throw dice with Death ("IRS"), [one die rolling towards the reader in exaggerated magnification showing it to be a NeXT cube] over clothing marked "Remnants of APParelLE" while Liberty "Ada" and Justice "Grace" in Mary's robes weep off to one side.

    In the background, light streams from a sun, eclipsed by the black Apple logo. A Twitter bird flying towards Steve's head. Off to the side, a suited man ("Corporate Raiders") carts a huge pig ("Corporate Profits") off in a wheelbarrow (with "99%" on the side) off toward a glowing bank building as a single coin (marked "1%") rolls toward the huddled masses who stand under a dark "iCloud?" supporting a globe topped by an octopus with the Blackberry dots on a toque, entwining its tentacles through the continents (except outlining China), one tentacle marked "London Server?" on the side and the one around Africa supporting Obama as Uncle Sam is washing his hands in a basin marked "Stagnation".

    As your eye darts from detail to detail, you see that the frame has rounded corners and the faint outline of a round button on one side and a slot on the other.

    And the quoted text at the bottom says: "Forgive them Father, they know not what to do."

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    • I'm sir, while you completely meet the "label everything" requirement I think you fail overall ro fulfill the brief by actually being funny. Try harder to suck next time.

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      • Hey the iPhone based odd typo corrections ate vaguely appropriate for once.

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      • My instructions were clear. NO humor was to be expressed or otherwise implied.

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  13. Were there editorial cartoons about Lovecraft's death? Were they suppressed and burned by the church? Are they still circulated in secret by insane cults who worship ancient and terrible powers?

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  14. I'm sorry, but "The city so nice, they murdered you twice" hasn't been NYC since the early 90's, it's still got that reputation (because people can't update their mental images), but it's just not as dangerous as it used to be. That title has found "greener" pastures in Detroit… and Cleveland…. and Hartford (you don't hear about it, but trust me, I know a few people who go to Trinity College, they *regularly* hear gunshots from campus).

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  15. Alright, I know I shouldn't care, but I'm Canadian and we do NOT say ABOOT! In fact, most Canadians sound pretty much like Americans, especially from the North East. Watch an American sitcom set in NYC, and that's what we sound like. I promise.

    Unless you're talking about people from Newfoundland; they might say aboot. It's a weird, otherworldly place over there and I cannot explain it…

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