Cursed, Hexed And Vexed

I doubt it’s actually in real danger of cancellation (no I don’t), but according to sources (rumors) Marvel IS seriously trying to ruin Whedon’s Avengers by demanding a potentially impossibly low budget.

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Commenters: What effects will budgetary cutbacks have on Avengers? Will Hulk go back to “dude in green makeup?” Will Ant man just be filmed from really far away? Will S.H.I.E.L.D.’s headquarters be in a booth in the back of a Denny’s?

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52 Comments

  1. With the gypsy curse and the Evil Fox Executive, it's suprising Joss finds any work.

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    • I think the curse is his work getting cancelled. If he never got work at all, then no one would ever know about him, which sucks, but not as badly as the tantalizing prospect of an awesome project getting its legs cut off.

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  2. I'm convinced they'll make it a TV movie of the week… and they'll show it on Friday. Or during the Super Bowl.

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  3. But I like the coloring! It’s got all the colors a flashback should have.

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    • well, the new colors are up now but based on your feedback i decided to make the first two panels more muted in their tones. So hey, you helped.

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    • I almost went with an Uncle Enyos reference.

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  4. As with all Whedon projects, if his fans experience a moment of pure happiness it promptly gets cancelled.

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  5. Iron Man will be demoted to Aluminum Man.
    Hawkeye will have to switch to lawn darts.
    The wasp will be played by an actual wasp when she gets small.

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    • oh, also, Captain America will be replaced by Capitan Puerto Rico.

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      • El Capitan.

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        • Played by Eli and He rides to the rescue in the El Deloreo

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  6. It'll get made, Robert Downey Jr. will get replaced with Jeffery Dean Morgan and they'll be fighting disaffected Eastern Europeans, but it /will/ get made.

    In all seriousness though, did you hear that they got Lou Ferrigno to voice the Hulk when he's Hulked out? How badass is that??

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  7. Disney buying it is the worst thing that could've happened to Marvel. They had a good 2-year run, but don't expect Marvel to continue where it was headed. There's a reason Pixar split from Disney…

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      • Yeah Im not sure what he meant, but I think they can still operate as a separate entity. Like PIxar still calls all their own shots and disney just reaps the benefits.

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        • Pixar split from disney a while back, then went back and let themselves get bought out in return for a loooooot of money if I remember right.

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  8. Hawkeye's arrows will have orange suction cup tips, and the Black Widow will be played by an actual spider.

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    • Nerf bow and arrow all they way.

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  9. Have they announced the bad guys yet? You don't need to hire new actors to play Skrulls and you can even reuse all the same effects.

    Or Hulk dogs. It'll probably be Hulk dogs.

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    • Actually its Hugo Weaving as Red Skull but I assume he'll now be replaced with Michael Ironside from Starship Troopers.

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      • Hey! No Michael ironside hating!

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        • As long as he gets his arms cut off, I'm OK with Ironside.

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          • his arms get cut off a lot more than most actors.

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        • His and Common's name being flashed on the screen during the oping credits of Terminator Salvation led to me openly groan and think "What the fuck have I done"

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        • not hating, just pointing out his typical B-Movie status.

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      • Really? I hadn't heard that, thanks. In that case, they can replace the Cosmic Cube/Tesseract with a plastic Avengers tumbler from Burger King.

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  10. In a last ditch effort, they will cut Chris Evans from the movie completely and instead use footage from the 1990 (?) Captain America movie.

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    • Let's face it, they could cut Chris Evans and use a cardboard cutout and noone would notice the difference

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      • Why, he's a good actor and the Captain is one of the two main characters…

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  11. I also loved the inside Buffy joke. Why oh why can't the rest of the 'verse bow down and worship Whedon like the rest of us?

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  12. Despite my really not liking that ep, loved the BTVS line.

    So where do I sign up to become an equity investor to make up the budget difference and reap the rewards of percentage of gross sales?

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    • remind me, which line was from Buffy?

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      • The lines from "Once More, With Feeling," AKA the musical episode.

        "Dawn's in trouble. Must be Tuesday."

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  13. does anyone know if you have to refresh to get replies to comments? Could someone reply?

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    • this is pretty off topic for this thread. more suited to an email.

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      • Especially considering how good you are at getting back to people who send you e-mails. Which is particularly good.

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  14. Shouldn't have made "Epitaph One". Now everyone want's to exploit the shoestingy budgetness that the magnificent one possesses. Frankly I'm okay with story driven. If they all they wanted was craw, poof, kaplow they could have hired Michael Bay. But Joss can do both. So for the love of crumb cake let him.

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  15. The Shield Heli-carrier will just be a black mini-van driven by Dum Dum Dugan all the while Sam Jackson tells Iron man and Kirk's dad about the names of fast food in other countries, this goes on for 45 min as their driving around looking for the Red Skulls lair/condo.

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    • And Scarlett Johansson will turn out to be "The chosen One" and she will hunt vampire Nazis and fall in love with Captain America but he turns out to be cursed so their love is forbidden… oh and he sparkles.

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      • oooo… I can't wait to see that 😉

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        • Why does that sound like a remake of "Underworld"? "Underworld 4: The Underning!"

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  16. If Joss Whedon ever experiences true success he loses his soul and becomes a Fox executive.

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    • I cant imagine theres any real danger of this.

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  17. Freakin gypsies and there curses. Do they noy have the ability to lighten up? Cursing seems like an overreaction to scruffing their shoes (which, btw, look like they were hiding under that really long skirt).

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  18. "AVENGERS ASSEMBLE … these sets. We can't afford a work crew, so you'll be pulling double duty."

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  19. thats perfect.

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  20. The Neilson TV ratings people have perfected new technology. Did you know that happiness emits a specific pheremone that can be detected by a sophisticated sensing array? They know.

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  21. Nice little Drag Me To Hell reference, but still a horrible movie.

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  22. Actually it's a reference to "Thinner." Ive never seen Drag Me To Hell.

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  23. Ant Man from far away, LOL. He's not even going to be in this, right? Which is too bad, because now I'm going to have to invent Ultron myself.

    Also, remember that scene from Iron Man 2 where he meets up with Fury and Black Widow in a booth in the back of a generic Denny's? (As I recall.) Your prophecy has ALREADY COME TRUE!

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