Therefart iAm

The only I reason I can think of for Apple looking to Phillip Shoemaker, the creator of such apps as “Animal Farts” and the e-urine v-simulatrum “iWiz“, for a leadership position in the App Store is that Steve Jobs has realized his own mortality (being that Apple could easily bring about The Singularity but has chosen to delay the product cycle to better fit with projected Q3 2012 earnings estimates) and is dead set on driving his company into the iFarting ground on his way out.

Just as Willy Wonka sent out his golden tickets to find a suitable heir to his chocolate empire, Jobs created The App Store with the soul purpose of finding the fart-obsessed piss-app monger who could make sure Apple legacy for quality and style would die with him.

HOLY SHIT THIS WEEKEND IS BALTIMORE COMIC CON!!!

I will be in the Artist Alley at table A164 with Fancy Bastard Alex (Mechamenchi) at my side. Baltimore was the first show I ever exhibited at and my first taste of seeing experiencing the kindness, generosity and sense of community of you, The Fancy Bastards, in person. One of the biggest highlights of the show was the FB meetup. I would really like to do another Baltimore FB meetup Saturday night August 28th around 7:30 or 8pm. Last year we did it at Hooters because they had a nice deck and could accomidate a good-sized group, but I am open to suggestions for a different meeting place. Please comment below of you think you will be able to make it (and understand that I will be heartbroken if this doesn’t happen since I have been looking forward to it all year).

I Have Found It!

Congrats to Amy, Jaime and the cast of crew of Eureka for their fifth season pick up! If you don’t watch Eureka, now is a great time to start. It’s smart, geeky and funny and a new episode airs tonight on Syfy. According to the twitters, an upcoming episode will feature (the return of) Wheaton, Felicia Day and Stan Lee! That’s geekdiculous. If you are reading this comic with any regularity, they are making this show FOR YOU. This is YOUR SHOW. Watch it.

[Note to Amy: I really just have absolutely no idea what an E.P does but it seems like you have fun, love what you do, work extremely hard and wrangle turkeys.]

UPDATE: Amy posted a helpful breakdown of what it means to be a producer, EP, Co-EP, etc. but also added this disclaimer.

The Dallas Webcomics Expo is this Saturday!
Aug 21 in Plano, TX [MORE INFO]
With Something*Positive, Cyanide and Happiness, Complex Actions and more!

I know I’ve taken more than my fair share of pot shots at Syfy for their frequent (and awful) creature features, but the honest truth is they are also making some of the most geek-centric TV available this side of the good Doctor. They gave us freaking BSG for frak’s fuck. I just have trouble rectifying these two halves of the Sy-ence Fy-ction entity. I realize that cable channels are just corporations and corporations make all kinds of different products (Phillip Morris makes tasty cheeses AND poison-filled cigarettes), but when those hyper-diverse products fly under the same banner it’s a little harder to compartmentalize. For instance, the fact that Kurt from Glee and Glenn Beck’s paychecks are banked by the same Australian media overlord is mind-googling. I would assume the annual Newscorp employee picnic is a particularly tense event.

Anyway, my friend works her ass off to make an awesome show and ride’s a sharktopus to work every day that’s pretty cool. [I am no closer to understanding what her job is]

Truffle Shuffling Off This Mortal Coil

Blast you, Wheaton! Stop daring me to draw comics based on my own tweets! I will do it every time! I can’t… I can’t resist your eyes. Those wonderful eyes. Like two pulsars being extinguished in a pint of Guinness.

The Dallas Webcomics Expo is this Saturday!
Aug 21 in Plano, TX [MORE INFO]
With Something*Positive, Cyanide and Happiness, Gastrophobia, Complex Actions and more!

If any Dallas area Fancy Bastards want to have a meet-up after the show I am game. Respond with your intentions in the comments.

If you liked the 4 part “Under The Bridge Downtown” series of comics, you can get them as a really nice 11X14″ print for a limited time.

Concerning this comic, the point I am trying to make is that no matter which way you look at it The Goonies did not have a happy ending. Not in the slightest. Before we talk about Chunk’s fatal act of kindness towards a gentle but fiercely strong beast-man, let’s discuss the “resolution” of the main plot of the film. The kids go on an adventure to find “rich stuff” in order to save their shit hole town from being turned into a much nicer place to live. Blah blah blah, murderers, blah blah, pirate caves, etc etc and they end up with one marble bag full of pirate treasure (seemingly all precious stones) worth an indeterminate amount of money. And I don’t want to get off on a tangent here, but WHY DID THEY LET THE SHIP GO?! “You see this bag of pirate treasure? There’s like a million billion more pieces of it on that ship out there. You know that ship. The one we can see. It’s maybe a half a mile out, just drifting out to sea. Yeah, that’s the one. Should we… no, you’re right. Best to let Poseidon reclaim her.”Continue reading→

Under The Bridge Downtown: Epilogue

The swap meet will live on, Rob… in our hearts. [queue theme song]

Final super special thanks to Rob D of Cyanide and Happiness for guest starring in this series of comics.

Do you guys want a big (11X17) print with all 4 of the “Under The Bridge Downtown” comics on it? Say for $15? Comment below.

UPDATE: Here’s a mock up at 11X14. I was kind of surprised that the comics still read well when chopped up and reformatted into a 4 panel format.
UPDATE 2: It’s in the store for a limited time! Get it while you can.

BUY THE PRINT HERE!

HEY DALLAS, TX AREA FANCY BASTARDS!
DALLAS WEBCOMICS EXPO IS THIS WEEKEND!!!

The Dallas Webcomics Expo – Aug 21 in Plano, TX
With Something*Positive, Cyanide and Happiness, Gastrophobia and Complex Actions
MORE INFO

Here are some more shows I am doing in the next few weeks:

Baltimore Comic-Con: Aug 28-29 @ in Baltimore, MD
MORE INFO

Dallas Animefest: Sept 3rd – Sept 6th, 2010 Dallas, TX @ Hyatt Regency Dallas at Reunion
with Shortpacked and Two Lumps
MORE INFO

Under The Bridge Downtown Pt. 3

To be concluded in “Under The Bridge Downtown: Epilogue”.

I’ve been having a ton of fun with this experiment in brief, contained continuity. If you like it, I may inject a bit more of it from time to time. I might do a big, 4 comic tall poster of these when I’m done. Any interest in that sort of thing?

Additional special thanks to Rob D of Cyanide and Happiness for guest staring in this series of comics.

COME OUT TO ONE OF THESE SHOWS!!!

DWEX 2010: THIS IS NEXT WEEKEND!!!
The Dallas Webcomics Expo – Aug 21 in Plano, TX
With Something*Positive, Cyanide and Happiness, Gastrophobia and Complex Actions
MORE INFO

Baltimore Comic-Con: Aug 28-29 @ in Baltimore, MD
MORE INFO

Dallas Animefest: Sept 3rd – Sept 6th, 2010 Dallas, TX @ Hyatt Regency Dallas at Reunion
with Shortpacked and Two Lumps
MORE INFO

UPDATE: The print is in the store for a limited time! Get it while you can.

BUY THE PRINT HERE!