The Hand That Feeds

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Did you know the horrifyingly deformed Hand Turkey is the official mascot of Thanksgravy? Each year on this day, little children leave a ladle full of gravy under their pillows and while they slumber, bellies plump with yams and holiday spite, the Hand Turkey will come to visit them. If he deems them good and virtuous and sufficiently crammed with pie and/or hungover, he will leave a gift under their pillow. And sometimes on the floor next to their bed. And often right on their miserable little cranberry sauce stained faces. He’s a generous bird. A loathsome, self-hating bird, but a generous one none the less.

How about you make your own Thanksgravy Hand Turkey and post a link to your masterpiece in the comments. If you post them to Twitter, use the hashtag #thanksgravy.

COMMENTERS: Please add to the myths and traditions of Thanksgravy and the Hand Turkey. 

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13 Comments

  1. Wait… how did comic!Joel's hand turkey get its extra 'finger'? 😛

    I'm a Canuck, so we had Turkey Day already, but happy Thanksgravy to you!

  2. Thank Evolution that such a delicious dinosour ever slowly transformed into a ball of meat. It is said that the Thanksgravy turkey has memories of its' glorious Saurian past, but is now entombed in its' current Lovecraftian form. Every drumbstick grows again, more mishappen and painful than the last…..

  3. "And on the first day of Thanksgravy, it was declared by the Gravy Overlords that if you doth not look like a woman in her 9th month of pregnancy at the end of the meal, ye shall be smote by the turkey gods. And after the belly is full to this level, ye must eat of some form of pie as well, or you shall be thrown, alone, into a lion pit full of relatives you have not spoken to in a year, whom insist on discussing every. single. day. of the previous year."

    – The Thanksgravy Official Rulebook, circa Some long ago time.

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