She Could Have Had It All

“George Hurt You” shirts are in the store!!!

Show Us On The Trilogy Where George Hurt You - funny star wars t-shirt, george lucas shirt, star wars parody

[Thanks to @cajunjoel for the tweet that inspired this comic.]

This starts off a week of pre-JocoCruiseCrazy Lo-Fi comics, and will lead into a week of fantastic guest comics from some of my favorite artists and Internet funny types.

I watched the Grammy’s Sunday night, which is odd since I am extremely disconnected from “the music the kids are listening to these days with the hips hops and the jim-jams and such.” I tuned in right as front Foo Dave Grohl was making an impassioned acceptance speech about how important it is to learn to play a real instrument and really sing into a microphone and not worry about over producing and striving for phony perfection and… he was played off stage by LMFAO. That pretty much distills exactly how I feel about the current state of popular music. I was also rather outraged that domestic abuse not only DOESN’T hurt your chances of winning music’s highest award, but it actually seems to help your odds. Despicable motherfuckers should be treated as the pariahs they are and not like aspirational heroes.

I went on a marathon live tweeting of the Grammy awards presentation and I suspect I lost a few followers. Those that stuck around are my true Fancy Bastards and we could probably share a beer with two straws in real life.

COMMENTERS: Did you watch the Grammys? Do you, like me, think this year’s awards will always be remembered as “The year WUBWUBWUBWUBWUBWUBwuhhhhhhhhhhvrrrrrrrrrWUBWUBWUBWUBWUBWUB made it’s Grammy debut?” Do you identify with modern pop music or are you [also like me] seeking out more and more specialized/obscure music that isn’t fit for the mainstream? Where are you finding it? I am listening almost exclusively to instrumental prog-metal these days. Animals As Leaders has really opened my eyes to a whole slew of bands that I didn’t even know were out there.

Reptilis Rex launches this week!
A new online comic called Reptilis Rex starts this week! It’s about a species of Reptoids that have been living in the hollow Earth all throughout history who, for some reason have to come to the surface and integrate with human society.

The creator, who goes by the admitted pseudonym William Tallman, is one of my favorite cartoonists and a nearly functional human being to boot. Please do support his new effort and share it with your friends. There is already a week’s worth of comics in the archive.

You can now purchase a super high quality 11×17″ print of any HE comic by clicking the “Buy A Print” button between the “Previous” and “Next” buttons in the navigation menu. If you don’t see it, try refreshing your browser cache.

Get HijiNKS ENSUE Comic Prints!

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  1. All I want to know is if the song writers for Phineas & Ferb have even been nominated for a Grammy yet. If not, it reveals the Grammies for the hollow mockery they are.

    *goes to check if they have been nominated*


  2. Im still dumbfounded that 3 distict groups have emerged from the Chris Brown thing.
    Group 1: WTF he should be in prison not an award show (Im fond of this one)
    Group 2: Give him a chance. People change. Bleding heart brigade
    Group 3: He can beat me all day as long as he dates me! Facepalm

    • If I were non hypocritical and a better person in general I'd be in Group 2, but I fear I'm in Group 1. Hard to think of him as a transformational hero when he never served time or even did fake community service. Plus, his music is derivative and dull.

      • I think you're in the right group, I'm all about rehabilitation, but Chris Brown has done nothing to prove he's not just an abusive asshole who should be rotting in jail.

        Also: Thank you Joel for bringing this up. I feel like the collective attention-span of society is about five minutes long, and this is not something that should be lightly forgotten.

        On a musical note: Nobunny. If the Ramones and Chuck Berry had a musical love-child, Nobunny would be it. Plus he wears a bunny head. That's just weird and awesome.

      • You're not a less good (less better?) of a person for not being in group 2. Unfortunately the nature of domestic violence is it comes in cycles where it may seem like they've had a change of heart. It's very rare for that to stay permanent though.

  3. I've been listening to a lot of 8-bit/chiptunes and similar variants. You can check out Spamtron or Bunnymajs. They're not instrumental, but they have actual musical elements instead of sounding like a sack of bricks in your washing machine. Also, Newgrounds Audio Portal has a lot of talented (and a lot of not very talented) artists across every genre, and under their creative commons license it's available for download. If you've got a genre in particular you'd like to check out more of, I can probably recommend a few good artists.

    • Take a dive through 8 Bit Peoples now and again. Don't sign up to ride from A to Z … just pick some random bit here and there. Some unlistenable, but here and there you'll find a real gem.

  4. I live in Baltimore. We've still got a decent underground scene for metal, hardcore and punk. I'm just too old to go out to these shows anymore. Once you hurdle age 30, you lose your dive bar cred. Now I just sit at home with my dusty old CD collection and wonder why my kids listen to such awful, horrid drivel.

    As a side note, it's going to be HILARIOUS when I'm 70 and the Oldies stations are blasting Blood For Blood, Assrash and 25 Ta Life.

  5. Along the same lines as you Joel, I prefer to think of this year as "The Year Drugs Were Officially Accepted by The Grammys as Part of the Audience" Someone else I follow ended up tweeting similar and I can't get it out of my head now.

    My music tastes though fall somewhere between. I like some of the modern pop (which is the first time in 15 solid years I've said that) but I still look for some random band/artist and listen the hell out of it.

    @Fren: That will be one of the greatest moments of my life.

  6. I don't watch awards shows as I find them boring. Do I listen to pop music? No way. If there's no one playing a real instrument, I refuse to listen to it. I mainly stick to the bands I've liked for years, but occasionally I'll hear something new and add it to my list, or some old band I hadn't hear before.

    And Reptilis Rex, the art style looks reaaaaaaaaaaally familiar and since you mentioned the creator's name isn't their real one, now I'm positive of who it is. Definitely gonna keep reading it.

    • "Since when is pushing a button and then pushing another button considered music?" Is what I think. I long for the times when the word "lyrics" actually meant something. People would put meaning in their songs. It used to be that when an artist makes music, the only way they could get recorded is if someone else liked it. Now, anyone can get a recording contract, and it is almost like they are the only people that like their own music.

  7. Part of me died a little when I realized LMFAO was a real group and not a colossal gag to milk YouTube money. I appreciate some of the effort and talent it takes to make good Dubstep or Electronica but it's diminished by the lack of effort, and vast majority, who make shitty remixes.

    PS: Chris Brown should be tried by a jury of jilted Hispanic women who got dumped over Valentine's Day and allowed to punish him personally.

    PPS: Opeth is freakin gorgeous. Guitar Boner Central.

    • I am fairly sure LMFAO are not taking themselves seriously, so I'm okay with them. The video for "Sexy and I Know It" is pretty hilarious. That guy is not sexy and he knows it.

  8. I didn't watch, but enjoyed your running twitter commentary. I do not understand how Chris Brown was even let in the building. What a scumbag! As for music, I've had the new TW Walsh album (Songs of Pain and Leisure) on repeat for a while.

    I love the sparkly hint of breastplate and armor in the second panel!

  9. adele made this years grammies boring as hell
    it was just like, "oh hey, adele is in this category, guess i get to change the channel for a minute"

    also, deadmau5's head did a cylon reference

  10. My girlfriend is hard for Adele, so we ended up watching the Grammy's together. I mostly had no idea who the hell anyone was. I pretty much listen nerdcore, chiptunes, Overclocked Remix, and the like. I recognized the Foo Fighters and the frackin' toaster that Deadmou5's head turned into. For clarity, I recognized the toaster, but only later did I find out the performer's name was Deadmou5.

  11. Since you live in DFW I recommend 91.7. You can also find it online at Granted you will hear Adele and some other main stream talent on there, but they also play some I'm sure you've never heard of. There is a station on iHeartRadio ( that is very similar, World Class Rock. I would describe both as Adult Alternative.

  12. I did not watch the Grammys but I laughed alot at the live tweeting which was awesome.

    As far as current music goes, I'm ok with the state of pop right now, mostly because it's literally the Techno I've been listening to for years but with American labels attached. I still think guys like Headhunterz, Tiesto, and Showtek are doing it better, but that's because they've been at it longer as opposed to whatever the hell was going on with pop back in the early 2000s

  13. As a lover of classical music, I can't help but laugh whenever people whine about how music isn't as good as it was 20 years ago. While I'll accept that -is- the case, its also not nearly as good as it was 100 years ago. Learning to play a real instrument and sing? Sure that's important. So is learning music theory and proper technique which two thirds of rock musicians never bothered to do.

    Long story short, we're doomed as a society and have been for decades.

    • I agree. I'm a cellist? and think that people don't appreciate the classics, or the origins of the music they have now. The Beatles were a Pop/Rock kind of group, but they used a string bass, cello, violin, viola. They were all classicly trained and knew WTH they were doing. My sadness is obvious at the stupidity of todays so called musicians.

      • Uh, no, sorry, but none of the Beatles was classically trained. Paul McCartney had the most musical training of the Beatles; his father was a jazz musician and swing band leader who played trumpet and piano, and his grandfather was a tuba player. John Lennon was taught a tune or two on banjo and harmonica by family members, and was otherwise mostly self-taught. George Harrison and Richard Starkey (aka Ringo Starr), also were pretty much self-taught.

        The Beatles' producer, George Martin, was the person responsible for arranging the string parts, and other non-rock instrumentation, for the Beatles' recordings. That being said, all the Beatles learned quite a lot as they went along, getting better and learning to play more instruments, including George Harrison learning to play Indian sitar quite competently. I think Sir Paul McCartney can probably play pretty much anything you put in front of him nowadays.

  14. Dude, seriously.

    If there was EVER a comic that should have been done in full glorious colour, good sir.

    This was it.

  15. In the past few months, I have realized that my favorite radio station is starting to air the screamo crap that bands put out today. They stilled played some Queen, and AC/DC was still common. Ozzy disappeared in a few weeks. So did the Rolling Stones and Pink Floyd.

  16. So, did Jonathan Coulton win this year? When he finally gets nominated, THEN I'll watch the Grammy's. Instead I did a King of the Hill Marathon and was much happier for it.

  17. I listen to a fair amount of the odd and obscure stuff,…. I cannot understand half of what kids listen to these days. When peopel ride with me they get to listen to a mix of Gaelic Storm [celtic], Apocolyptica [gotta love Metal with Cellos], Abney Park [Steampunk band], Silly Wizard, Alexander James Adams/Heather Alexander, Seven Nations, The Dresden Dolls, Shakespeare's Sister,……

    BTW if you have not seen/heard some of these they are worth the look up

    • Amanda Fucking Palmer and The Grand Theft Orchestra, with the Dirty Business Brigade. Mrs. Gaiman has given me, finally, something to listen to that's new.

  18. I gave up on watching the Grammies years ago, because I found I no longer cared about the vast majority of acts that won awards. I have to admit to having been surprised, though, when Radiohead won an award a number of years ago. It almost made me have faith in the Grammies again. Almost. I also gave up on listening to FM radio years ago. I do listen to some Sirius/XM stations in the car, but most of them can be pretty repetitive, and the compression rates are just hideously bad. I have pretty broad musical tastes, and like listening to an internet radio station, Radio Paradise. They don't play everything I like, and I don't like everything they play, but they hit a lot of it, and they play old and new music, so I have a chance of noticing if somebody new and interesting comes out. Sometimes I also get music recommendations from friends.

  19. If you're looking for non-mainstream music, select a band on Pandora you listen to a lot, & it'll start finding artists that follow that music type. I discovered LOTS of kick-ass artists I didn't know existed that way.

  20. Question: How are you guys able to find these obscure, non-mainstream, choices of music? I could use the internet if I just had something to start with. And Joel, I agree, pro-metal is the tits!

    • We don't use google. It's too mainstream. Try carresing your ethernet cord until it gives you the address to the best collection of hipster music. That, and money is way too mainstream. We instead use albino squirrels as currency.

      • Also, When carresing your ethernet cord, don't use any type of lotion. Instead, murder female figs and turn the fat into lard and then mix it with butter. The tears of Newt Gingrich is also a viable substitute.

    • As much as I hate to say it looking for the "hidden gems of music" kind of follows that joke "Rule 34,… if you can imagine it there is a porn about it " ,..the same goes for obscure music. A lot of what I find I find via background music,…. I will hear a neat song in a movie and look up who sang it,… I will be out driving and hear someone playing good song on their car radio,…. or sometimes it comes sitting at the Coffee shop [local one not Starbucks] and debating life and a song/band comes up. Oddly Youtube can sometimes help,…. I was looking for some videos from DragonCon and stumbled upon "Abney Park" because the video used them as background music and one of their music videos was in the recommended column,…. try typing what you want from music into Youtube,… "progressive Metal",…. "instramental Metal",..etc [just going by your comment],…..

      • Best background music, randomly: Chipotle restaurants. I think they even have a webpage where you can view their current music selections.

    • Shazam is your friend. Some of our friends swear by Pandora, although my husband and I have not had good luck with it. If you use iTunes, they have a radio feature that allows you to select internet radio stations by category. Then you just have to pick one within the category list and listen a bit to see if you like it.

  21. I've always been of the opinion that music is music, period. I don't mind people having preferences, but it always annoys me when people say "X isn't real music because it doesn't have Y". If the artist calls it music, I'm gonna take their word for it. Unless it's clearly a book or something, in which case I'll just call them an idiot.

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