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Alternate Title: OMFZ!

“Hey Supes! You and Lois should come check out my high end steak house, Grill Before Zod. Or my combination massage school/bake your own bread joint, Knead Before Zod. Then there’s my Antarctic wildlife preservation society, Seals Before Zod. That one sort of conflicts with my Alaskan oil lobby, Drill Baby Drill Before Zod. I gots my Zod-Fingers in All Sorts of Zod Pots. I’m trying to build a global freaking brand here.”

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  1. Heel Before Zod: Shoestore
    Dill Before Zod: Pickle factory with attached store specializing in pickles and pickle-based products.
    Keel Before Zod: Boat repair shop/funeral parlor.

  2. What, no mention of my new broadway show, "Terrible actresses doing nothing but looking pretty: Jessica Biel before Zod?

  3. There's also his nautical navigation repair shop: Keel before Zod… And the japanese steakhouse concept: Meal before Zod… And the guest line of Hattori Hanzo blades: Steel before Zod

  4. Interior decoration: Teal Before Zod.
    Medical clinic: Heal Before Zod
    Fagin-style school for future wayward children: Steal Before Zod
    Aquarium supply shop: Kreel Before Zod
    Legal Services: Appeal Before Zod
    (I can't believe this hasn't been done yet): Restaurant chain: Meal Before Zod

  5. At the Kryptonian Kafeteria, they serve Meals Before Zod (ans an Early Bird Special, Zod Before Five)

    And one thing Arrested Development had planned for if it hadn't been cancelled: Lucille (and the Loose Seal) Before Zod.

  6. And of course, if he'd succeeded in his scheme of world domination, and then later gotten tired of being emperor and let his subjects acquire more self-determination, he might have had:
    Commonweal Before Zod.

    I thank you.

  7. During his time as a crossing guard, he held a sign that read "YIELD BEFORE ZOD"

    & after a few years in med school he saw more than one foolish human "HEALED BEFORE ZOD"

    & sometimes when I think of my favorite movie villains from the late 70s/early 80s I tend to think of 007's Jaws, played by richard KIEL BEFORE ZOD

  8. What about his shoe store, HIGH HEELED BEFORE ZOD!


    I think I'll go punch myself in the taint now.

    • And the chain of chiropractic clinics, Heal Before Zod. Unfortunately, when he cracked a spine, he really CRACKED a spine, so he ran out of clients pretty quick. He was more successful, though, with his fishing-tackle shop, Creel Before Zod.

  9. Or his partnership with Laverne & Shirley, Schlemeil Before Zod (Hassenpfeffer Incorporated)

    Or his pedicure parlor, Toenail Before Zod…

    Or his summer home in Egypt: Nile Before Zod…

    Or his breakfast cereal endorsement deal: Malt-O-Meal Before Zod…


  10. Or his book about the conspiracy behind the JFK assassination: Grassy Knoll Before Zod…

    Or the his collaboration with Kate Pierson and Fred Schneider: Kneel B52s Zod…

    Or when he sued Alex Rodriguez for plagiarism for "Kneel Before ARod"…

  11. Movie review site: Reel Before Zod
    Modern art gallery: Surreal Before Zod
    RV dealer: Fifth Wheel Before Zod
    Laser eye surgery clinic: Corneal Before Zod
    Paint store: Colour Wheel Before Zod

  12. Not to mention the Christmas Special: Noel Before Zod.

    … or the beauty magazine, Elle Before Zod …

    And, of course, the seminary: Zeal Before Zod.

  13. it got kind of sad when he sunk so low as to star in the "reality" TV show: "the Surreal life Before Zod"

    But he needed the money after his failed New Orleans style restaurant: "Creole Before Zod"

    I feel dirty now, I need a drink…
    guess that means I need to head over to the corner pub: "Ale Before Zod"

  14. Man, this one's making the rounds! I'm filing a petition with the Tropes Board to have this achieve Ascended Memehood straight away.

  15. course, he lets out his dark side at the strip club when he gets the two-girl lap dance and tells them to "Cop a Feel before Zod"

    he tried pitching a show to Fox back in the day, when they told him no he said "Ally McBeal before Zod?"

  16. Having not seen any Superman related news recently, is it a bad thing that when I saw the title "OMZ" in google reader, I immediately thought "must be Oh My Zod"?

    Oh, and don't forget Zod's brief (and regrettable) foray into the porn industry: Todd Before Zod

  17. His cookbook of terrines, pates and other forcemeats: Congeal Before Zod
    Star Trek cos-play: Trill Before Zod
    His mid-market chain of big-box stores: Retail Before Zod
    Zod and Beastie Boys' rap collaboration: Licence to Ill Before Zod
    That time he was a British spy: Licence to Kill Before Zod
    His Congressional campaign: Bill Before Zod
    Injured and sick porcupine rescue mission: Quill Before Zod
    Prison warden: Jail Before Zod

    • Why do I think I'm going to see that name in a MMORPG sometime in the near future? If it isn't being used already?

  18. I would buy the Deliverance-style Squeal Before Zod in a HEARTBEAT. In Superman II he was one hot leather daddy…

  19. his cereal company: oatmeal before Zod
    Sushi restaurant: Eel before Zod
    Camouflage company: Conceal before Zod
    Swordsmith: Cold Steel before Zod

    I think I should stop now…

  20. To unwind after escaping the Phantom Zone, he takes up Cubism and abstract art. The resulting gallery show is called Surreal Before Zod

      • I stopped watching "Smallville" when the fellow calling himself the Green Arrow showed up, so I don't know the answer to this, but…Was Superman ever actually in the show "Smallville"?

  21. All of these commenters should apply at "Spiel Before Zod". And be on the lookout at McDonald's for the new "Happy Meal Before Zod". If this all bothers you, you can talk to a therapist at "Feel Before Zod".

  22. Storefront art gallery: Surreal Before Zod.

    Notary public: Seal Before Zod.

    Irish dance class studio: Reel Before Zod.

  23. There was that one time he closed out the show for a pop act turned lounge act: Captain and Tennille Before Zod

  24. I was really hoping the beef farm would be "Veal, Beef, or Zod."

    That said, let's not forget his hardware store: Nail before Zod.

    Or his public-speaking-for-sales-reps class: Speil before Zod.

  25. Of course, there's always his chain of manure dealers: General Zod's Craptacular Store

    …but we don't talk about that one.

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