Podcast for this week is up in the air since Josh will be off gallivanting (literally) in another state and Eli will be at a couple of cons. Trying to figure out when we might be able to do one. Otherwise I’m going to edit the Lunchcast from February and use that.

Here are some things to have:

• Steampunk Mac Mini: what will they steam-punk-out next?
• Hack-A-Sketch = fucking hAwesome
• Buffy isn’t gay, but her girlfriend is
• Ohh, tha-uts na-usty: Cleveland gets a Family Guy spinoff
• TRON sequel in the works
• The Onion Movie
• HAHAHAHAHAH! Monster cables vs. coat hangers
• Judgement day is upon us
• Starbuck + 6 + leather + motorcylces = some geek’s head just asplode

UPDATE!
I forgot to  link to the best thing I have ever seen on the internet. Seriously, it’s all been worth it because of this video: Will Arnett Sex Tape (from Human Giant Season 2)

I guess you can untie the virgin from the pike and stop stoking the fires at her feet. We also won’t need to sacrifice these goats and suckling pigs to our golden TV idol after all.

Damn it.

That’s right, the strike is (probably close to) over. Why? Because some Disney fuck wad said so. A part of me hoped that it would go on forever and this lack of TV would cause us to evolve into a new society governed by intellect and good will rather than greed and self destruction. Then I realized that only SCRIPTED TV was effected. If this had continued any longer, we would have nothing to watch but game shows and reality TV. Personally, I’ve seen enough of “Are You Sluttier Than a Fifth Grader,” “Who’s Dad has the Bigger Dick?,” “Celebrity Coke Addicts in Thunderdome,” “Celebrity Coke Addicts at the Bottom of Well,” and “Celebrity Coke Addicts Work at a Jamba Juice and the prize is Cocaine.”

It will be nice to see a new The Office or Heroes at some point, but I hope I emerge from this ordeal forever changed. I would like to less dependent on TV for entertainment. Oh shits! “Admit Which Ethnic Groups You Hate (For Money)” is coming on FOX.

Because I did.

I didn’t actually forget because I never knew about it. That’s weird. Despite that fact that I would have no reason to turn on ABC while Lost isn’t airing, you would think the particular internets I frequent would be buzzing with Lost premier news.

For those that must be in the know, io9.com has extremely detailed Lost spoilers here, here, here and here.

TV Guide’s Michael Ausiello has some updates on the premier and a few minor spoilers. He also says the writer’s strike might be over with an announcement as early as tomorrow.

Is it just me, or have you all enjoyed this break from TV? I started to realize how little I actually enjoyed some of the shows I was watching (Prison Break), and have been able to let them go. I feel like a contrived, poorly planned, monotonous burden has been lifted from my shoulders.

It will be nice to see the writers getting back to work and the watchable shows coming back to the air. I hope the industry reemerges stronger and smarter because of this ordeal.

I wonder what long term effects the strike will have on shows like Lost that already have odd production schedules. Truncated season? 4 mini seasons instead of 3? 4 deaths per episode? Can they resurrect Niki and Paulo and kill them again?

Nostalgia Side Note:

I started Hijinks Ensue last May with the idea of making fun of geek culture, especially TV. Lost was one of the first shows I tackled. Check out those early efforts here, here, and here.

So, Conan went back on the air sans a writing staff. I assume he didn’t want to do it this way but pressure form the network and advertisers was probably too much to bare. Before bed I decided to flip on his show (I haven’t watched it since about season 3 or 4 when it was super-freak-out-low-budget-weird-awesome) and see what they could possibly do without writers.

The monologue was more like 4 min of so-so stand up (no news or references), with a lot of filler. Then this happened:

Not since Little Conan Babies, or the Masturbating Bear have I been so simultaneously entertained and confused by the chalky white giant with the scarlet pompadour. The best part is that he was DEAD serious. You know he sings that in the shower.

Cally Tyrol is the fifth and final Cylon.

There. I said it. The gauntlet is thrown. What’re ya gonna do? Nothin. Deal with it.

Check out this “Last Cylon Supper” pic and blurb from io9.com (Gawker’s new scifi blog). I wonder if they served toast. I read the clues from Ron D. Moore and I’ve interpreted them thusly: The final-fifth is NOT in that photo (Cally is NOT in that photo), and he refers to Cally and Chief Tyrol’s baby as “seeming to be the 2nd human Cylon hybrid.” There’s your money shot. He SEEMS to be but he’s not. He’s the first biological Cylon baby.

Season four won’t premier until April so we probably won’t get confirmation on this for quite some time. Go ahead, and place your bets in the comments. I’m sticking with my theory (at least until it’s proven completely and utterly wrong).

Gob Bluth is the voice of K.I.T.T.? I don’t know if thats the coolest thing I’ve ever heard or some kind of cruel trick…(sorry) illusion.

If you’ve never met the real Eli and you would like to get to know him better, just watch this.

“Machine Girl” is basically a love letter to Eli’s brain written in arm stump blood, with a machine gun, on your face.

Last thing: I was talking to the Internet and I asked him what it would be like if an electric carving knife was sodomizing a watermelon. Then I cried because I knew we would never know. The Internet smiled and said, “I thought you’d know me better by now.” Then he unzipped his pants and raped my eye-holes with this video.

The only thing that would make it better would be someone screaming in German throughout the whole clip. THANKS, INTERNET!!! YOU”VE BLINDED ME WITH YOUR PENIS AGAIN!

A pox has fallen on my house yet again. My wife was sick (really sick) all weekend so the comic took a backseat. It will be posted tomorrow morning.

Until then, here’s a sneak previews:

You don’t have to say it. I already know.  “Hotness.”
I apologize of you soiled yourself.

Number the also:

The shirts from the presale should have arrived or should be arriving soon. Please let me know how you like them and send me a pic of you draped in your new garb.

Cixous over at Livejournal (from the Battlestar Blog) sent me this pic:

I want to make sure everyone that bought a shirt knows how much it means to me. I worked really hard on the designs and I hope they become your favorite shirts. I’m still having a hard time comprehending that people in other countries are wearing things that I crapped out of my brain. The crap-brain boggles. Also, boobies. Check that out. You can’t go wrong.

Want your pic posted on this site? Go pick up a shirt and send me the pic!

Did I mention Ron Moore?

Holy shit. The whole TV world is exploding into crazy fucking chaos!

Via AICN.