JoCo Cruise Crazy 3 Guest Comic By Chris Hallbeck Of Maximumble

JoCo Cruise Crazy 3 Guest Comic By Chris Hallbeck Of Maximumble

JoCo Cruise Crazy 3 Guest Fortnight is over! We are safely docked somewhere in Alabama or Mississippi or one of the other states you are supposed to completely avoid. The passenger unload is going much faster than anticipated since we don’t have any luggage. I mean we HAVE luggage, but after 4 days without power or running water pretty much everything became a de facto toilet. We’ve drunk all the fresh water from our souvenir snow globes and boiled the shells from our souvenir necklaces to make a sort of broth we called Sea Juice. All in all this trip was 100 times better than the time I went to Branson. If I may be ever so slightly serious for a moment, JoCo Cruise Crazy 3 was once again a transformative experience. I made new friends, strengthened old friendships, frolicked on tropical beaches with some of my favorite people and received world class entertainment every single day and night provided by some of the most wonderful funny people, musicians, and purveyors of talent that I have ever shared a floating mall-hotel with. If you are on the fence about going next year, GET OFF THAT DAMN FENCE! It’s a week of fun that you will never forget or regret. It’s crazy expensive, but what are you going to take with you when you die? Money or memories? (If they find a way to let you take money with you when you die, I will go back and amend this post, because… I mean, c’mon. That would be AWESOME.) I haven’t even gone through my photos yet, but if I do make Fancy Photo Comics of...
JoCo Cruise Crazy 3 Guest Comic By Sam Logan Of Sam And Fuzzy

JoCo Cruise Crazy 3 Guest Comic By Sam Logan Of Sam And Fuzzy

JoCo Cruise Crazy 3 Guest Fortnight is nearly back to the mainland! The pod of friendly humpback whales there were towing our powerless and increasingly Thunderdome-esque vessel back to Florida ended up being chunks of that possibly mythical, Texas-sized trash island that broke off and developed sentience. Monstrous trash whales are truly the gentle giants of the sea. As I mentioned yesterday, the final 3 Guest Fortnight comics feature three different artists taking on the same idea. What if I got on the wrong boat? I mean, I like big boats and I cannot lie. Who’s to say I’m going to be super picky about WHICH big boat I stumble onto? They all look pretty much the same. Round, juicy… bubble…y? You know? Boats. Fellas? Fellas? Does your girlfriend got the boat? Sam Logan is a Canadian, but please do not hold that against him. He wouldn’t even know if you did, as that Canadians lack the gene for understanding sarcasm, rudeness and the general purpose “Healthy Directionless American Rage” we take for granted. He is my friend and he makes a comic about a… let’s same a circus clown and a monkey. I’ve never really been able to tell. Maybe the monkey is a cat. Maybe they’re both cats. It’s on the Internet, so chances are pretty good it’s all about cats. He also has something to do with one of my favorite Tumblrs called “Skull Panda Loves Everything.“ I think he’s the webmaster.  Canada probably still has “webmasters,” right? I bet they also have “newspaper columnists” and “record company executives” and “doctors” that “help keep you well” so...
JoCo Cruise Crazy 3 Guest Comic By John Kovalic Of Dork Tower

JoCo Cruise Crazy 3 Guest Comic By John Kovalic Of Dork Tower

JoCo Cruise Crazy 3 Guest Fortnight is dead in the water! No power, no food and plenty of sea-wage backed up  into the staterooms, we’re now being towed back to port by a pod of friendly humpback whales. I’ve decided to cut the Guest Fortnight a bit short (you will still see the 2 additional guest comics when I head out to Seattle for Emerald City Comicon in a couple of weeks), since coming home from the JoCo Cruise has left me creatively charged and I am anxious to get back to work. A weird thing happened when I put out the call for guest comics a few weeks back. Actually two weird things. First, nearly everyone I asked said yes. I usually ask for at least twice as many guest artists as I need expecting plenty of no’s. This time around the no’s were not to be found and the fantastic comics just kept hitting my inbox. The second weird thing is that three of the artists had THE EXACT SAME IDEA and turned in their comics at roughly the EXACT SAME TIME. It was obvious that a certain topic (one regarding folk covers of songs about butts and television networks drunk with power and copious legal council) was on a lot of peoples’ minds and ready to be made fun of in comic’d form. I’m going to post all three of these comics in a row so you can see how three fantastic comic artists interpret the same idea. They’re all great and come at the subject from a different angle. The first offering this week is...
JoCo Cruise Crazy 3 Guest Comic By E.K. Weaver Of The Less Than Epic Adventures Of TJ And Amal

JoCo Cruise Crazy 3 Guest Comic By E.K. Weaver Of The Less Than Epic Adventures Of TJ And Amal

JoCo Cruise Crazy 3 Guest Comic Fortnight wraps up week one with this stunning depiction of, what I can only assume, are completely factual events by E.K. Weaver of The Less Than Epic Adventures Of TJ And Amal. The only part I find highly suspect is that Lar and I would be in the same life raft with Jonathan Coulton. When you’re headlining your own cruise, I’m pretty sure they reserve space for you on some sort of emergency evacuation mini-sub with the captain, first mate and probably a sentient, talking dolphin. Or at least a narwhale that knows sign language. I made a bunch of shirts and put them on the internet for to you buy. Wil Wheaton helped. I meat E.K. when we were on a panel together last december at Dragon’s Lair Webcomics Rampage. We didn’t get much of a chance to talk or hang out that weekend, but I was really floored by the quality of her work. Her comic is a stunningly drawn, gay positive long format story and I recommend it to those of you who are fans of quality. Thursday, eh? So is this day five of the cruise? Is this even a day? Is there still a world on the other side of this vast expanse of ocean and boat-smashed whale carcasses? My brains are no doubt sunbaked and rum-basted beyond cognition by now. The inhabitants of our city-ship have abandoned human language in favor of communicating only in sea shanties. We barter for leftover buffet hard rolls and pancake batter with jewelry made from the bones of our dead. There are two...
Monkey Sea, Monkey Cruise

Monkey Sea, Monkey Cruise

The HIJINKS ENSUE STORE Is where you can buy stuff that I made! It supports me and my family and keeps this littler operation going. The Jonathan Coulton Cruise, JoCo Cruise Crazy II, is only a month away! Do you see my pants? Do you see how excited they are! EXCITEDPANTS! A few more things you should know about JoCo Cruise Crazy II: The only form of currency accepted on the ship are “secrets whispered into a beard.” If Paul F. Tompkins catches you without a mustache you must answer his riddle lest you be forced to wear the “Shame Fez” and fed to a shark. All island dwelling children are to be treated as hostile and you should throw bits of glass and screws into their eyes before they can lunge for your pockets (which should be filled with a jellyfish just in case). There is a 24 hour buffet so revoltingly opulent as to make Poseidon himself vomit with embarrassment. Should you find yourself caressing an unwilling dolphin it is best to commit to the path you have chosen and power through. And finally there’s a secret gaming room on board that can’t be found on any map. You can only enter if you have a real need of it, and it’s always equipped with the right dice for the seeker’s needs. I’ve only been on 2 proper vacations in the last decade, and one of them was sort of terrible (thanks Mexico).  Because of my poor vacation track record, I am particularly overwhelmed that not only am I getting to take my wife on a fabulously geeky cruise, but I am also going to be...

Project Coultonfield

Courtesy of JoCo and Paul and Storm In related news, here are some comics about Cloverfield (1,2) and Jonathan Coulton (1,2,3). Tags: cloverfield, jonathan coulton,...

Coulton hates on the haters

I just read this post from Coulton. Some sweet girl posted a fan video for “Still Alive“ on Youtube and it made the blogosphere rounds this week. Of course, as soon as someone shares a piece of there self with the world, the shitbags come out of the woodwork to scare them back into their insecurities. Joco says: Where’s your thing that you made and put online for everyone to see, you chicken-shit cockhole? … So it drives me nuts to see people lobbing bullshit negativity into the crowd – if you don’t like it, don’t watch it. And if you don’t have a piece of yourself to contribute, keep quiet. The rest of us are working here. God damn right. Where is your contribution? Where did you post the little piece of your soul that I may skull fuck it to death? I mentioned yesterday about getting hateful comments on Digg. It comes with the territory. Create something and share it with the world, then dive into a hole and hide from the backlash. Denizens of the internet are generally hateful toward everything they don’t absolutely love. What happened to “it’s not for me,” or “I have different tastes.” No way, man. It’s all “die from 1000 cancers” this and “suffocate on your own cockandballs” that. Calm down internet. Not everything is a fight. Walk away from the sites, and songs, and comics you don’t like just like you would change the channel on TV (without going to the producer of the show’s house and throwing lit shit baggies at him). Learn the difference between “I dislike…” and...

Jonathan Coulton Live Concert DVD in San Francisco

Just got an email from Jonathan Coulton about a concert in San Francisco that will be filmed for a live DVD. All the best stuff is happening in San Francisco. I’m posting this because I wholeheartedly support the proliferation of JoCo’s musical message of robots parts, mathmatics and self destructive squid love. If you’re in SanFran make sure to check out the show. I will definitely be picking up the DVD. (Read on for the secret message from JoCo.)  From  JoCo‘s email: My apologies if your geographical location makes this email irrelevant, but THIS INFORMATION MUST BE KNOWN: On February 22 I’ll be doing a show at the Great American Music Hall in San Francisco. I’ll be accompanied by a crew of video production people who will capture whatever magic happens there, and later, re-assemble it on a DVD that hopefully the entire world will purchase. With any luck, this will also lead to a proper live CD. I’m telling you all this because it’s important that the show be fun and special and generally awesome. If you live in San Francisco, I insist you come to this show. If you don’t I hope you’ll tell your San Francisco friends about it so they come instead. This will be fun! And expensive and terrifying (for me, not you)! Buy your tickets here: www.gamhtickets.com Will there be more shows? Yes, somewhere, sometime. Honestly I can’t think past the 22nd right now, and a lot of things are still coming together. When stuff gets booked, I will spam you about it. I promise. See you in SF! -j Tags: jonathan coulton,...
Moist and Delicious Cake

Moist and Delicious Cake

The world has gone 8 kinds of ape shit for a 3 hour video game called Portal, and it’s citrus flavored container. Josh has scolded me on multiple occasions for not not playing it yet. He doesn’t understand that his simple directive of “JUST PLAY THE GOD DAMN GAME, YOU’LL BE SO FUCKING HAPPY WHEN IT’S OVER! FUCK YOU!” actually translates to “Go buy an Xbox 360 and The Orange Box just so you can play Portal, OR install Windows on your Mac via Bootcamp and procure the game via less-than-legal means JUST TO PLAY PORTAL! FUCK YOU!” It’s more likely that I would drop $400 on a game system to play one game (I paid $250 for Wii Sports, didn’t I?) than it is that I would ever let a Microsoft OS creep its insidious creepy insidiousness onto my Macbook Pro. Though I’ve yet to experience Portal’s glory hole game play magnificence, I have fully engrossed myself in Jonathan Coulton’s contribution to the title. Read more about “Still Alive” on JoCo’s site. Tags: gabe newell, gaming, jonathan coulton, portal, the orange box, valve, video...
Jonathan Coulton: Zombie Fighting Troubadour pt. 2 (Extinction)

Jonathan Coulton: Zombie Fighting Troubadour pt. 2 (Extinction)

Amazingly enough, there actually is a part 2 to last week’s edition of “Jonathan Coulton: Vampire Slayer Zombie Fighting Troubadour.” First thing’s first. The JoCo show last Wednesday at Club Dada here in Dallas was a blast. Jonathan’s performance was fantastic. JoCo is quite different from most comedy/music acts. Jonathan’s songs seem to be about robots and squids and ruined ponies on the surface but you can tell the underlying emotion is real. It reminds me of a geek that is trying to tell a girl he loves her and all he can muster is a Buffy analogy. Also, I highly recommend Paul and Storm, who opened for Jonathan and backed him up on about 1/3 of his set. They were more or less straight comedy but their set killed. Afterwards I gave Jonathan a print of the for “JC:ZFT” comic. He signed a copy of it for me and posed for a pic with Josh, my wife, Emily, and myself (as is evidenced below). What a cool guy. Also, if you haven’t seen JoCo perform “Mr. Fancy Pants” live with his wearable-midi-trigger-contraption… then you haven’t seen that. And you should. Because it was entertaining. If you aren’t a JoCo fan at all and this comic made no sense, please go check out his music page and listen to “Re: Your Brains.” You’ll be smiling when it’s over. Originally the comic wasn’t going to have anything to do with Resident Evil: Extinction, but Josh dragged us to it and I felt I had to get some kind of value for my $9. It’s my own fault for saying yes....
Jonathan Coulton: Zombie Fighting Troubadour pt. 1

Jonathan Coulton: Zombie Fighting Troubadour pt. 1

(Written Wednesday 9/19/07, which was yesterday)  The Jonathan Coulton show is tonight. This means I don’t have tonight to finish tomorrow’s comic. Well, guess what, you nay-sayers (always nay-saying)? I finished it last night! Lube that up and stick it in your corn-tube. This is unusual for me (the finishing early, not the tube part), since I generally live by a strict code of professional procrastination. If I told the you the exact steps I take to make a comic and what order I did them in, you could easily spot the trends in declining quality as I approach the tasks I complete after 1:00am. (hint: It’s the drawing and the writing). Imagine that last sentence being read by Stephen Hawking. In that scenario “quality of comic”= entropy and 1:00am = the speed of light. I think that makes me the singularity and my couch the event horizon. The point is, I collapse in on myself and then someone has to reboot the universe (hold power for 5 seconds then press F8 to enter safe mode). Somehow this turned into an XKCD comic. Regardless, I’m psyched for the JoCo show and hope to see you there. Special thanks to all of you who have been Stumbling HijiNKS Ensue! Tags: jonathan coulton, music,...

Jonathan Coulton in Dallas Wednesday 9/19/07

Jonathan Coulton is a personal hero. He’s just some guy from NYC that writes funny songs and distributes them over the internet. Over the last couple of years he’s turned his music into his full time job. He is completely supported by me and you and everyone else that enjoys his music. You’ve probably heard his folky acoustic cover of “Baby Got Back,” or maybe you were lucky enough to see him perform at this year’s PAX. His rise to internet fame stems from the close connection he keeps with his fans through his website. Email him. I dare you. He’ll respond. He helped me with the code for Corn Mo’s music store just because I asked him how he’d made his own. What a guy! Go listen to his songs Go read this article about him Check out fan-made videos on the Youtubes Then go see him on tour Specifically go see him this Wednesday in Dallas at Club Dada (doors @ 8pm) with the HE crew. Tags: concerts, dallas, Internet, jonathan coulton, music, PAX,...