We Got It All On UHF

Ephram? Paw? Sweet Apple IIe of Appalachia, it’s The Technobillies!

Ephram and Paw get their satellite service from a special program provider that caters directly to those of a certain cultural status. It’s 400 channels of reality-game shows hosted by Jeff Foxworthy.

This is a friendly reminder to call your grandma and explain why her “tv box got all snowy” and she “can’t watch Maury and The Wheel“.

I doubt many of you were negatively afftected by the analog Tv shut-off, so how about we just make up other shows that would be on Ephram and Paw’s satellite service?

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61 Comments

  1. I guess it's out of the question to suggest that people who can't buy and install their own converters should instead go buy a $10 radio…

  2. Unsolicited suggestion time!

    You should have a "random comic" button on your header, or with the nav buttons below the comic. I like when webcomics have these, because sometimes you just want a quick hit of funny.

    • second. make the button something like big. and a catchy name. "Fun-Shot" "Random Fancy Bastard?" i dunno.

      PD: just got a new 1.5 Gig RAM. gonna (re)start translating comics in my new blog
      (santiagoaquino.wordpress.com)
      The font was Lafayette Comic Pro, Right?

  3. CSI Hoskin’s Corner – This week’s episode: The investigation team, Luke and Zeke and Zeke’s dog who’s also named Luke, finally get their DNA test kit in the mail only to find out that everyone’s matches.

  4. Gynencosynchronicity is a concept I would welcome with open arms. It'd be worth the week of hell knowing that ALL women were giving that hell all in the same week.

    Great comic title, BTW.

    • This must have come up before somewhere. The phrase "Ladies, synchronize your periods!" was already on my list of "phrases I need to incorporate into something someday" and I have no idea what inspired me to put it there.

  5. Please God, if there is any justice in this poor excuse for a world, let the word "transmogrifisplosion" get into the dictionary.

    • well, argentinian word "fernet" is going into the RAE dictionary. its a BRANDED alcoholic drink. i think transmogrification can go into the US dictionary.

  6. Our attempts at coping with the DTV changeover mostly involve doing diddly-squat too, not because we have cable or satellite but because everyone in my family, bar none, is too damn lazy to actually do anything about it. We have one digital TV in the house and converter boxes on all the others, but of course none of the antennas are powerful enough to actually pick up half the channels.

    Oh, and we have a DVD recorder hooked up that nobody wants to learn how to use. (Would you believe subscription-free DVRs don't even exist? Madness!)

  7. Oh, and now that song is stuck in my freaking head.

    YOU CAN WATCH US ALL DAY
    YOU CAN WATCH US ALL NIGHT
    YOU CAN WATCH US ANY TIME THAT YOU PLEASE
    YOU CAN SIT AROUND AND STARE AT YOUR PICTURE TUBE
    TILL YOUR BRAIN TURNS INTO COTTAGE CHEEEEEEEESE

  8. I actually was affected by the switchover because I'm too cheap to pay $60 a month to time warner to get the 8 cable channels I'm interested in.

    I have a digital box that I bought several years ago when they were very expensive on one TV, then I have a digital tuner in my desktop computer. Both are hooked up to indoor antennas.

    And everything was fine except one of my stations decided to move their digital signal from the UHF band to the VHF band. I tried both antennas, and I can't get that channel to show up anymore. So thanks, WLUK, I've apparently now lost the ability to see you.

  9. I like the "ugly closeup" a la Ren and Stimpy in the middle panel.

    also Baby Jesus in Outer Space sound like a title for an awesome shitty movie.

  10. I am way too young to have watched UHF but I have heard the song. Wait, what does UHF stand for? We don't use that terminology in Australia.

    All we have is Foxtel and Austar and stuff unless you watch Free to Air, we don't get half the crazy shows you Americans get. Not that one would want to watch all those trashy reality shows when we could be watching The Gruen Transfer…

      • This obviously isnt a serious question so I wont bother with a serious answer. If you want to comment on this site please be respectful. Maybe you spend too much time reading CAD to know how to be kind on the internet.

  11. The reference to the "wok" seems awfully cosmopolitan for the hill-billys. I think he'd more likely to refer to it as a, "Tekmogasmatronic Ear'Horn."

  12. When people were crying foul back in Jan/Feb about the conversion and how SO many people would be left behind… you know, because they could figure out how to get the FREE conversion boxes that the government provided… well, I was thinking, hey, here's a new list of people for the next round of supervirus-based eugenics!

  13. When people were crying foul back in Jan/Feb about the conversion and how SO many people would be left behind… you know, because they couldn't figure out how to get the FREE conversion boxes that the government provided… well, I was thinking, hey, here's a new list of people for the next round of supervirus-based eugenics!

  14. Hah… As a Questionable Content reader for a few years now, I can't help but find it awesome that we completely obliterated your website with our WAAAAAGH of fanbase.

    …and now time to read the entirety of your comic, in a single sitting.

    • I sort of knew it would happen. Jeph has the 2nd largest audience in webcomics. Im happy to have you guys reading the comic, so I little down time is no sweat.

      • Whoa, a response. O_o Almost like…. you're *real*.

        Done with the whole comic, now… and all I have to say is: At least it wasn't another Digg-death.

  15. Just have all the 'Blue Collar Comedy' shows on back to back and non stop.
    Awesome comic, laughed my gigantic, pasty white, British arse off, especially at the 'making breakfast in reverse' bit!
    However, we will be facing the reality of the digital domination fairly soon… Mass panic will ensue and the little old biddies who can't watch Bargain Hunt of weekday lunchtime will be out en-mass threatening the world with their knitting!

    • Nanageddon?

      "Blood on the walls, of London Town
      Satan's evil in a nylon gown
      Evil cakes
      Fiery Lakes
      Nanageddon's coming with a demon in a wig"

  16. American Idol
    The O'Riley Factor
    Hannity
    Reno 911
    Most of WWE's Programing

    … wait, we were making up fake shows? I thought these would actually be on a hillbilly satellite service.

  17. This is a friendly reminder to call your grandma and explain why her “tv box got all snowy” and she “can’t watch Maury and The Wheel“. -this made me lol so hard!

  18. This is a classic, Joel. Seriously, I'm grinning from ear to ear. Excellent script; you write hillbillies disturbingly well. 🙂

  19. Trailer Fabulous! Which was a real and entertaining show, even if it was on MTV.
    My Big Redneck Wedding. Which was also a real show and filmed one of my parents neighbors weddings, they road to the altar on a tractor.
    Deadliest Roadkill
    Project Taxidermist
    Are You Smarter Than a Woodchuck
    Family Feud: First Blood
    Bayou Chef: Guess If It's Edible
    All in the Family Values

    BTW: Technically the receiver first catches and then "descrambilates" the signal. I know, it's nit-picking.

  20. Shine On!, a doc'mentry program all about folk what makes they own hooch. Fambly recipies is shared, lawmens is shot.

    Hey, MacLeod, Get Offa My Ewe! – situation comedy about a Scots-Irish family with a Rolling Stones soundtrack.

    Monster Trucks and Twelve Point Bucks – A program that features bikini clad women driving monster trucks through the back country's best deer hunting spots.

    We could probably fill the rest of the time with professional bowling and reruns of Dukes of Hazzard.

  21. If you find yourself unable to stop commenting on years-old strips during an archive run, you just might be a Fancy Bastard. Or at least a desperate wannabe.

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