JoCo Cruise Crazy 3 Guest Comic By E.K. Weaver Of The Less Than Epic Adventures Of TJ And Amal

JoCo Cruise Crazy 3 Guest Comic Fortnight wraps up week one with this stunning depiction of, what I can only assume, are completely factual events by E.K. Weaver of The Less Than Epic Adventures Of TJ And Amal. The only part I find highly suspect is that Lar and I would be in the same life raft with Jonathan Coulton. When you’re headlining your own cruise, I’m pretty sure they reserve space for you on some sort of emergency evacuation mini-sub with the captain, first mate and probably a sentient, talking dolphin. Or at least a narwhale that knows sign language.

I made a bunch of shirts and put them on the internet for to you buy. Wil Wheaton helped.

I meat E.K. when we were on a panel together last december at Dragon’s Lair Webcomics Rampage. We didn’t get much of a chance to talk or hang out that weekend, but I was really floored by the quality of her work. Her comic is a stunningly drawn, gay positive long format story and I recommend it to those of you who are fans of quality.

Thursday, eh? So is this day five of the cruise? Is this even a day? Is there still a world on the other side of this vast expanse of ocean and boat-smashed whale carcasses? My brains are no doubt sunbaked and rum-basted beyond cognition by now. The inhabitants of our city-ship have abandoned human language in favor of communicating only in sea shanties. We barter for leftover buffet hard rolls and pancake batter with jewelry made from the bones of our dead. There are two factions on board. Those that wait for people to die before making their ankles into anklets, and my team. The winning team. Oddly enough, all of this was outlined in the brochure.

COMMENTERS: Have you ever been in an emergency evacuation situation? When I was a kid we were eating at a Red Lobster when flames started shooting out of the kitchen. We ran outside as the building burned. This dude next to us had taken the time to rescue his plate of crab fettuccine. I assume his priorities regarding survival began to shift as soon as he realized his meal was going to be free. I would not be surprised if he tried to order some Cheddar Bay Biscuits[TM] to go on his way out of the collapsing structure.

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26 Comments

  1. Back in 2000 my hometown caught on fire (controlled burn that wasn't), does that count? My part of town wasn't evacuated due to imminent burning but because
    A) There are two roads out of town, one was where the fire started and the other could be threatened if the wind shifted and blew it along the right canyons.
    B) Everyone who had been evacuated from the other part of town had mostly gone to shelters in our part, so there was twice the volume to evacuate.

    So it was a lot of frantic packing followed by waiting. My brother and I biked back and forth making sure elderly folks were ok and noting which roads were moving to let people know about progress. Evac was called around 1AM and I think we finally got out around 8, we were on the farthest point from the road and so were pretty much the last ones out of town. It was eerie. Still, during the whole shebang nobody in town lost their temper, no injuries, nobody even honked. We take pride in that.

      • I think our sign says "Welcome to Los Alamos. If you don't already know why you're coming this way, why are you here?" Friendly enough people, but there's not much to do aside from capital-S Science and gorgeous wilderness. We're in the middle of nowhere and not on the way to anywhere else.

  2. While working as a process operator for an oil company in northern Alberta, Canada I had the occasion to be on site during a large leak on a 54" line which was used to transport thousands of pounds of fluidized "coke" or what is essentially dirty carbon at temperatures of 640*C (that's 1184*F for you Yanks). As I was the one who discovered it I had the pleasure of radioing it in and then calling for a unit wide evacuation. Nothing seems to motivate people to leave heavily flammable oil lines and pumps like red molten flowing solids and smoke. The best part was that our job was to contain the leak with fire suppression equipment while standing next to high pressure oil lines until the mine fire team could arrive to relieve us. It only took two more serious leaks after that incident until I decided to go back to school for bookkeeping courses.

  3. One day my brother started an oven fire. My sister ran out of the house and my brother eventually got the fire under control. I was told about it later since my entire family left me upstairs SLEEPING the entire time.

    • You JUST reminded me that when I was 20 or so I stopped my mom's house from burning down when someone had put used charcoal in a trashcan next two a bunch of chemicals and paint thinner. We smelled smoke and ran out to the shared garage (it was a block of 4 townhomes) and the wall was completely on fire. I grabbed the water hose and put it out while everyone else just kind of stood there, frozen in disbelief.

  4. When I was 20 I was waiting for my mum in the car. When she some how trip on flat concrete(Still don't know how she tripped) . She fell right on her face, breaking her glass, of which all the glass broke in her face. I noticed her lieing on the ground. Ran out helped her up and used my hoody I was wearing to stop the bleeding. I phoned my Dad freaking out as he's a fireman and was closer then the nearest ambulance station (We live in the middle of the country side) He racing out on his motor bike, while i call the ambulance my mum still bleeding everywhere. They all turn up at the same time and rush my mum and dad off. I'm now stuck 6 miles from home and I can't drive so I had to walk it. The whole time all I could think was "Damn it that hoody is ruined" My mum was fine but had to have something like 40 stitches in her face but you can bearly see the scars.

  5. In college the lobby of the dorm I was in caught on fire in the middle of the night. The lobby is on the first floor in front of the building and my room was on the third floor in the back. I just grabbed my keys and went outside. All I wanted to do after the fire was put out was to go back to bed since I knew my room was not affected, the building is of cinder block construction.

    • Oh my god, and I just read through the entire thing in one shot. I am now addicted to it, and as an aside, the art is friggity-fraggin wonderful.

      I love that comic. 'Tis great.

  6. Since Joel had to write these before the events of this week happened, I keep wondering if he's on the Carnival cruise ship that is filled with poo.

  7. This comic made me think, wow, after days lost at sea on a a small dinghy with no amenities Joel could ALMOST look like Lar… almost…

  8. I was evacuated from Clark Air Force Base in the Philippines due to the eruption of Mt. Pinatubo. I was fairly young and recall being initially puzzled as to why that mountain seemed to be on fire. There was ash falling like dirty snow. When the time to leave came, I packed anything I couldn't bear to part with in my ballet bag. My mother, sister and I ended up on an aircraft carrier, my father was not evacuated. The sailors would carry children from floor to floor, as we were too small to safely climb the ladders. This once resulted in my being separated from my mother when I was passed up too quickly while she had to wait. I wandered off and cut my leg open trying to climb by myself. We stayed with a family on another island. I remember being awakened by earthquakes. Volcanic rocks fell from the sky at one point. I still have some. My father earned the Meritorious Service Medal for the lives he saved. I had the best show and tell for every school I attended.

  9. Several years ago, a California Boy Scout Camp had to be evacuated due to encroaching flames.

    During the evacuation, I felt compelled to sing a song about the Chicago Fires. Nobody was impressed, but I was greatly amused.

  10. Joel from now on your character HAS to be animated in such fashion

    All the other characters can be the same old style, but you have to stay this gritty and cannibalistic

    • It…does kind of suit him doesn't it?

      Meanwhile, I have to say thank you Joel for introducing me to TJ and Amal. I love it!

  11. I've lived nearly 25 years in Japan–3 years in at the northern tip of the main island of Honsu but the majority on the western outskirts of Tokyo. Earthquakes are a fact of life here. Most of the ones I have felt were usually just a mild rumble or jolt–nothing to get too alarmed about–until the monster 9.0 magnitude quake and tsunami struck 11 March 2011. While it was "only" 7.4 magnitude in Tokyo (and likely a little less where I am), the intensity and the duration were such that it was the first time I ever ever evacuated a buidling. It's not something I hope to experience again although it was nothing compared to those who really suffered the consequences.

  12. For many years in elementary school, they'd force us out of our classrooms for fire drills, and I would be constantly disappointed every time the school wasn't on fire for real. Until one day in 5th grade, the boy's bathroom in the building my classroom was in was on fire! Smoke in the hallway and everything! My first thought: "HOLY SHIT!!! IT"S ABOUT TIME!" then I thought, "If I grab the fire extinguisher in my classroom, charge down the hall, and put the fire, I'll be a hero!", then I was grabbed and dragged outside before I made my move.

    • In 5th grade my classroom burned down. We did the rest of the year in a the music room, sitting on the floor. It was weird.

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