A Lament For Language

NEWT FOR PRESIDENT!!! GET AWAY FROM HER, YOU BITCH!!!

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I’m not saying the Internet is making us more stupid. On the contrary. It’s just making us SOUND more stupid. Now if you will pardon me, I have to go update my Frangbo.

COMMENTERS: Have you ever found yourself uttering an Internet-born word or phrase with complete sincerity only to realize later how incredibly dumb it sounded? I still don’t like to say “he Tweeted me” or “they @’d me” in real conversation. I will usually take the long way around to “_____ said this on Twitter.” Alternately, please make up some more fake-but-totally-plausible-sounding social media services. 

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32 Comments

  1. Including internet phrases in a game of scrabble is fun.
    I've avoided doing it in real life, but even typing some things to people who don't use the internet beyond email can make you feel stupid when you then have to explain it.

  2. I use "lol" in every day conversation, not "el oh el" "lol." I dont know when it started but when I realized it I was instantly disappointed in myself, then did it again minutes later.

    • I was recently out camping with a group, and one of the people started talking about this conspiracy she'd heard somewhere on the internet, which was that "internet slang" was secret Satanist communications. We spent a good portion of the night, not only saying these words out loud "brb","rofl[she particularly liked rotfl-copter]", etc…, but we came up with a list of what they could be acronyms for.

      I don't use them in every day conversation, but I feel just as bad…

  3. Don't worry, internet speak will be banned in the 22nd century after it leads to the disastrous first contact with the Romulans and later the Klingons.

    "Rmlns, u ships no cloak yet? LOL!"

    "Hai Klgns, y u no haz ridges?"

  4. I told my son's third grade teacher that "he spells much better in leete speak than he does in English." I was met with silence on that one. Some people just can't admit they don't know what you're talking about.

  5. Including internet phrases in a game of scrabble is fun.
    I've avoided doing it in real life, but even typing some things to people who don't use the internet beyond email can make you feel stupid when you then have to explain it.

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