Wheaton Comic Dare: Wil Wheaton Paper Doll

HijiNKS ENSUE At Dallas Animefest

This weekend I’ll be at Dallas Animefest with Rob from Explosm. We’ll be in the dealer room, terrified of glomping cat-girls and Sailor Bubbas alike. I’ll have both HE Books, Prints, sketch cards, “Grammar Dalek” Shirts and “The Doctor Is In” shirts.

Wil didn’t so much “dare” me to make this paper doll as he did call me up and, with his best “WE SHOULD TOTALLY DO THIS BECAUSE IT WOULD BE TOTALLY AWESOME!” enthusiasm-voice, ask me very politely to draw it. The last time Wil dared me to draw him as a child’s plaything it took us over a year to bring it into meatspace. The good news is this time around the plaything in question doesn’t require an army of Chinese children with nimble fingers to make it a reality. All we really need is a PDF and a laser printer. To that end, Wil is going to have actual Wil Wheaton Paper Doll sheets that you’ll be able to purchase at PAX this weekend! For those of you unable to attend PAX, you can use the “Buy A Print” button below this comic to get your own Paper Wil.

I was under the impression that these would be “hang on the wall” types of things, but Wil is insistent that you guys actually cut them out, fold the tabs, dance them around and make them have holodeck tea parties. He is usually right about this sort of thing, so I’m going to fully endorse the idea. I would go as far as to suggest that you make your own accessories and post photographic evidence on one or more Internets.

COMMENTERS: What should be in a potential add-on pack for the Wheaton paper dolls? What accessories or clothes would a paper doll of YOU come with?

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49 Comments

  1. but how can he hold the things if his hands are on his sides?

    also THIRD!!!

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    • Epic Geeky Awesomeness can at times behave like it's own specialized gravitational field if strong enough. In Wil's case it is so strong that he he has his own satellites, the "accessories" the paper-doll comes with are those satellites.

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      • fair enough

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  2. the "Sexy Spaceship of Non-infringing Naughtyness"

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  3. Coloring Book Version is a must, obvs!

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  4. This is awesome! Beyond awesome! Now we need a Joel pack, an Anne pack, a Ryan pack, and the Wheaton Pet pack! (also everyone else that is cool pack)

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    • Oh, I agree! You should make a whole series of these of main characters from the strip! Ex. Josh in his regular day-wear could also come with his Fancy Bastard Pride Week outfit (you know the one!), as well as bacon!
      And any or all of these options would make me ridiculously happy! http://hijinksensue.com/2007/08/08/leeloo-dallas-

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  5. How about a Jeri Ryan/Borg Halloween costume?

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  6. "Furry Fox of creepiness disguise" from the Guild

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  7. crack pipe

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  8. Mohawk with stars.

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  9. I believe that there needs to be a Sparks McGee accessory or two in the add-on.

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  10. I believe that there needs to be a Sparks McGee accessory or two in the add-on.

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  11. The attention to detail of putting him on the holodeck? Fucking priceless.

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  12. Please tell me I’m not the only one who’s tired of Wil Wheaton’s smarmy “Don’t Be A Dick” attitude while completely being a dick to anyone with a different opinion. He needs to adopted “Don’t Be A Hypocrite” as his motto. The worst part is I agree with his politics, but at least I’m an unabashed dick about them.

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    • I think I see the problem. You're a dick.

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    • Yes, you're the only one.

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    • Have you ever met him? He didn't seem like a dick when I did. Maybe a confusion about disagreement with someones ideals and criticizing them (especially in the rhetorical space of a web page) vs. being a dick and treating them poorly in person? *shrug*

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  13. Wesley does not rock a Riker beard. We need a cleanshaven alternate face.
    And how about the recursive self-portrait from his Twitter background?

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  14. Please tell me I'm not the only one who's tired of Wil Wheaton's smarmy "Don't Be A Dick" attitude while completely being a dick to anyone with a different opinion. He needs to adopted "Don't Be A Hypocrite" as his motto. The worst part is I agree with his politics, but at least I'm an unabashed dick about them.

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    • Thumbs down for double posting 9 minutes apart!

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    • Q says: "Thou art a dick, and a dick thou beest.

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  15. Definitely needs an Overly Attached Wesley face.

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    • Im strongly considering adding the "Grown Up Wesley" head from Hide and Q.

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  16. The expansion pack needs the Sparks McGee cowboy hat and space Trans-Am cutout along with a homebrew keg, Fawkes Costume, Vandal Eyes, and a huge cutout Diorama backdrop of Sheldon Cooper's Head so that Wil can live there rent free! Bonus points for anyone who an get a pic of the paper doll up against the real Jim Parsons' Forehead!

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    • Vandal Eyes are a definite if I do an expansion pack.

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  17. yes! where is sparks's hat??!

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    • It will definitely be the first thing in if I do an expansion pack.

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  18. Excellent! I especially like the Android Phone of not being an iPhone :)

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  19. I’m sorry, but in order to really play with these properly I will need a paper LeVar Burton, Brent Spiner and Patrick Stewart.

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  20. Also a paper Marina Sirtis.

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  21. Finally, something actually geeky.

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    • That was unnecessary.

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  22. You need a life-size version for his stand-up on Table Top.

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  23. there needs to be tabs for the objects to peg in with (as well as a place for them to peg into

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  24. also he needs his Aeofel *cough* AL! *cough* costume

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  25. one word…

    snerkel

    that is all…

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  26. An awesome bedhead

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  27. He also needs the infamous Cape of Dicks.

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  28. What about a "Three Wheatons" shirt? That many Wils in one place…

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  29. I personally love that the Wil-designed "How We Roll" w00t t-shirt is the base shirt…and that it's the original version with the grey lines. Nice detail.

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    • That was Wil's idea.

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  30. Obviously he needs a labcoat and optional goggles, so we can all pretend "Eureka" is still on the air.
    And he needs the Penny-Arcade shirt he wore on an episode of "The Big Bang Theory", unless you want to go straight to "I bested Sheldon" or "My Mee-Maw's Not Dead" on a shirt.

    And what the hell – why not a Jesus costume? He could be the "Jesus" of Don't Be a Dick.

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  31. HAH! I love this.

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  32. the biggest question is:

    will there be a funny sombrero?

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  33. I like how he's standing in a holodeck.

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  34. Is..is it weird I kinda wanna print two of these out and make em do "stuff" to each other?

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  35. I think you should include his dogs. Since noone else answered the second part, if I had a paper doll….it would come with…. Ten's sonic, natch, since I carry it EVERYWHERE with me…hmm. Some kind of nerd shirt, since my nerddom spans many subjects…something to do with archaeology, since I'm a bit history nerd…so…a model of the Titanic? A little tiny dinosaur? A toy Isis? A Lancaster bomber to fly around my head? Who knows. My Converse would be a must, and my alternate Wheezyshoes or my black kitty shoes. I think there would have to be a dress (gasp!) since that rarely happens….and a costume from either Final Fantasy XI (BLACK MAGE RELIC/AF3) or Sylvanas' costume from WoW, lol….oh, a plush Tonberry would be a must. For reasons. >.>

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