Hey, Phoenix! I am going to be at you this weekend!

I’ll be with Rob Denbleyker at the Cyanide & Happiness booth (#14076) from Thursday to Sunday (May 28-31). I’ll have HijiNKS ENSUE and FANEURYSM prints for sale, and Rob and I will be doing C&H sketches all weekend. Hope to see you there! I get home on Monday...
Emerald City Comicon 2015 Fancy Photo Comic Part 2

Emerald City Comicon 2015 Fancy Photo Comic Part 2

Hustlin’ hustlin’, every day for three or four days at a time, every other month or so I’m hustlin’. It’s hard to be at a convention, trying to hawk some wares that you built with your brain and your fists and your guts, and then...
Emerald City Comicon 2015 Fancy Photo Comic Part 1

Emerald City Comicon 2015 Fancy Photo Comic Part 1

Most of these photos came from THIS VIDEO, in which I serenade David Willis in the back of a limo to Emerald City Comicon. A limo is a very silly mode of transportation, and being inside of one makes you feel like doing silly things. “It’s like a car, but...
Emerald City Comicon 2015 Fancy Sketches Part 4

Emerald City Comicon 2015 Fancy Sketches Part 4

THE FINAL ECCC 2015 Sketch-A-Matic Sketches! All of these are from day 3. This is part 4. Check out part 1, part 2 and part 3. The final sketch includes an awesome SPECIAL EFFECT that I learned from Kris Wilson. Of course, it negates ever hanging the sketch on the...
Emerald City Comicon 2015 Fancy Sketches Part 3

Emerald City Comicon 2015 Fancy Sketches Part 3

EVEN more ECCC 2015 Sketch-A-Matic Sketches. Most of these are from day 3. This is part 3. Check out part 1 and part 2. In case you were wondering, Picard, Data and Wesley are Ravenclaw, Riker and Deanna are Gryffindor, Geordi and Crusher are Hufflepuff and the...
Emerald City Comicon 2015 Fancy Sketches Part 2

Emerald City Comicon 2015 Fancy Sketches Part 2

More ECCC 2015 Sketch-A-Matic Sketches. Most of these are from day 2, with a few from day 3. In this one you can see some of the same cards that came up in part 1. I try to draw something different each time, even if I get cards I’ve already drawn. Though, I do...
Emerald City Comicon 2015 Fancy Sketches Part 1

Emerald City Comicon 2015 Fancy Sketches Part 1

I had so much fun with the Sketch-A-Matic at Webcomic Rampage, I decided to bring it to Emerald City Comicon. Due to a retweet from my buddy Wil and a reblog on the official ECCC Tumblr, I had people lined up all weekend to “press the button.” I did a TON...

Emerald City Comicon 2015 Is Basically Right Now!

Seattle Fancy Bastards need to know these things: I will be at booth 110 with David Willis​ all weekend. I will have lots of awesome prints, new and old, big and small (ask to see the big ones because they are in a book). I will have the Sketch-A-Matic! If you buy two...
Dragon’s Lair Webcomic Rampage 2014 Fancy Photo Comic

Dragon’s Lair Webcomic Rampage 2014 Fancy Photo Comic

“Now David, everyone knows Jesus can only see you if you move. Just like a T-Rex.” My friend David draws naked college kids smashing their under-bits into each other for his job. I’ve read some of them. He’s… he’s good at it. Tags:...
Webcomic Rampage 2014 Fancy Sketches

Webcomic Rampage 2014 Fancy Sketches

INTRODUCING THE SKETCH-A-MATIC! The idea is simple, but the technology behind it is VAST and COMPLICATED! It works like this:  The willing participant presses the big, red, impressive button The machine SPRING TO LIFE whirring and gyrating and buzzing When it finishes...
The Fleece Whisperer

The Fleece Whisperer

There is no greater feeling than that of one’s own bed, except perhaps for the feeling of one’s own bed after an extended period of time away from one’s own bed. It’s akin to abstaining from sex, so that when you finally do it you have all this...
Absence Makes The Cat Go Bonkers

Absence Makes The Cat Go Bonkers

Every single time I come home from traveling one of my cats has completely forgotten I ever existed, and the other is positive I am an undead replicant or possible a million alien bugs wearing a Joel suit. The apathetic one, Replay, briefly looks up from licking his...
Learning Through Osmosis

Learning Through Osmosis

 This is such a true story, it is MULTIPLE true stories. With an S. The first time this happened I was in Toronto and the My Little Pony: Equestria Girls toys were being debuted at the show. Kiddo was obsessed with the movie and I was missing her first day of 1st...
When I Say Pants, You Best Pants…

When I Say Pants, You Best Pants…

Update 09-03-14: GAH! Toronto Fan Expo was a ton of fun, but the preparation, time spent there, time traveling home and recovery have and ARE costing me greatly in terms of productivity. I am frantically trying to update/backdate new comics so there are 4 a week for...
Nth Class

Nth Class

Update 09-03-14: GAH! Toronto Fan Expo was a ton of fun, but the preparation, time spent there, time traveling home and recovery have and ARE costing me greatly in terms of productivity. I am frantically trying to update/backdate new comics so there are 4 a week for...
Where Wings Take Dream

Where Wings Take Dream

TORONTO FANCY BASTARDS! I will be with Cyanide & Happiness at FANExpo Canada, August 28-31 at booth 456! I’ll have lots of shirts and prints and we’ll be doing sketches all weekend. We’ll also be hosting the 3rd annual Toronto Banana Bar Crawl! I...
The Show Is Over, Say Goodbye

The Show Is Over, Say Goodbye

David is my con-wife, and thus it is my responsibility to take care of him. I make sure he gets where he needs to be, that he’s well fed and that he stays hydrated during the day. Any free food or snacks or luxuries of any kind that I am afforded via fans or...
The Rain (Supa Dupa Fly)

The Rain (Supa Dupa Fly)

Last month the HijiNKS ENSUE Patreon went over $1500, which means 4 new comics a week is in full effect! This is the 1st new HE comic for this week. Here’s hoping I can keep it going. At $2000/mo we hit 5 new comics a week, and that’s when I flee to the...
Comicon Uber All Us

Comicon Uber All Us

Last month the HijiNKS ENSUE Patreon went over $1500, which means 4 new comics a week is in full effect! This is the 4th new HE comic for this week. Here’s hoping I can keep it going. At $2000/mo we hit 5 new comics a week, and that’s when I flee to the...
Man It’s So Loud In Here

Man It’s So Loud In Here

Last month the HijiNKS ENSUE Patreon went over $1500, which means starting right now there will be 4 new comics a week! Thank you all so much for the support! This is me at the end of every comic convention, but especially at the end of SDCC. There’s nothing...
Comedy And TrageD’oh!

Comedy And TrageD’oh!

Do me a favor, if you enjoy this comic, please check out my store, my shirts on Sharksplode, and my wife’s geeky jewelry on Etsy. It would help us out a great deal. DENVER FANCY BASTARDS: I will be at Denver Comic Con THIS WEEKEND with Cyanide & Happiness...
Pornographique

Pornographique

This is a 100% true story about the time my good friend, David Willis, gave me a boner with his brain. Well, technically he drew the cards with his hands, so… yeah, he basically straight up gave me a handy. Looks, all I know is he had a brain and some hands and...
The Cleaner

The Cleaner

I had A LOT of fun making this comic for some reason. Perhaps it was sleep deprivation induced euphoria, but the dialog, the inks, everything was just a blast to create. Especially that blanket in panel 2. I am super proud of that blanket. That’s a GOOD blanket...
No Re-Entry

No Re-Entry

At least a dozen of you DEMANDED that I make a shirt based on this comic, SO I DID. I also made you this super cute Adventure Time/Doctor Who shirt. GO BUY IT!  I have 4 or 5 submissions for the Fancy Fan Art Contest. I NEED MORE! “But, Joel! I don’t know...
The Escape Artist

The Escape Artist

At least a dozen of you DEMANDED that I make a shirt based on this comic, SO I DID. I also made you this super cute Adventure Time/Doctor Who shirt. GO BUY IT!  I have 4 or 5 submissions for the Fancy Fan Art Contest. I NEED MORE! “But, Joel! I don’t know...
Get To The Crapper!

Get To The Crapper!

Alternate title: “I Ain’t Got Time To Pee” 100% true story from the very first con at which I ever exhibited (except David wasn’t actually there). Something about a pink human dick emerging between a Predator’s legs made it seems like...
A Load Of Bullshirt

A Load Of Bullshirt

UPDATE: You guys demanded it, so the Transformers shirt in the last panel is a real thing now.  Of course comic Joel is reacting to the shirt he saw in THIS COMIC in the only way he knows how: with equal measures of drawing dumb stuff and righteous indignation....
Not All Menswear

Not All Menswear

Hello new readers! I hope you are enjoying the comics. Please check out the ABOUT PAGE and then check out the ARCHIVE PAGE so you can see the different types of comics I’ve created and posted here over the years. You might also want to read about THE EXPERIMENT,...
#BUTTCOIN

#BUTTCOIN

A reader emailed me one time and said they wanted to donate a Bitcoin to me. At the time they were worth around $160 of non-pretend (but, honestly, ACTUALLY pretend) US currency. I replied back stating that I was not a robot, and did not have a data port installed for...
Guest Comic By Natalie Metzger

Guest Comic By Natalie Metzger

CALGARY FANCY BASTARDS! Thank you so much for treating me so kindly while I visited your fine city, and thank you to my friends/brothers from  Cyanide & Happiness for hosting me and letting me play in there sandbox once again. I worked harder and drew more at this...
The Primest Of Directives

The Primest Of Directives

[actually posted on 4/25/14] Still playing catch up and still a week behind on comics. I sketched this comic on a plane and drew it in a Canadian hotel room. Convention permitting, I will be posting some more comics over this weekend. I’ve also got a pretty...
Merchandising 101

Merchandising 101

[actually posted on 4/22/14] Still playing catch up and still a week behind on comics. I have a pretty cool idea for how to get caught up this week, that I think many of you are going to enjoy. More on that when it’s actually a thing. I’ve also got a...
Give As Good As You Get

Give As Good As You Get

[actually posted on 4/21/14] Still playing catch up and still a week behind on comics. I have a pretty cool idea for how to get caught up this week, that I think many of you are going to enjoy. More on that when it’s actually a thing. RE: This comic Get it?...
Lost In Transportation

Lost In Transportation

[actually posted on 4/16/14] I’m still playing catch up on a week’s worth of comics. This is the second new comic I’ve posted today. You can see the previous one by clicking the back button up in the comic navigation. 100% Convention Truefacts! You...
Indisposed

Indisposed

[actually posted on 4/16/14] I’m still playing catch up on a week’s worth of comics. I’ll be posting a second new comic later today, so check back! This comic is based on the time Kiddo got her first Choose Your Own Adventure book. It’s...
That’s Why A Bear Can Rest At Ease

That’s Why A Bear Can Rest At Ease

[actually posted on 4/14/14] I’m playing catch up on a week’s worth of comics. Luckily I’ve got three written and I’m banging them out one after another. Just like Josh will be at his Bear Meet Up. Years ago, after Josh have given me a sort of...
Grizzly Mens

Grizzly Mens

[Actually published on 04/10/14] Life has been kicking my ass a bit for the last couple of weeks. A week ago my family and I were huddled in a closet during a tornado warning (which touched down EXTREMELY near my house), then a hail storm smashed both of our cars to...
The Bear And The Maiden Fair

The Bear And The Maiden Fair

[Actually published April 7th] Thank you, Fancy Bastards, for your patience. I’m playing catch up after a week of unexpected distractions. First their was a tornado/hail storm type of situation in my town. Luckily the tornado passed us over (just barely), but...
Constant Craving

Constant Craving

My Patreon is at nearly $1200! That’s amazingly insane! 3 comics a week (M/W/F) starts for real on April 1st! At $1500, you will be forcing me to do FOUR HE comics a week, and I am OK (if not somewhat apprehensive) with that. SEATTLE FANCY BASTARDS! Emerald City...
There’s Got To Be A Morning After

There’s Got To Be A Morning After

My Patreon is at nearly $1200! That’s amazingly insane! 3 comics a week (M/W/F) starts for real on April 1st! At $1500, you will be forcing me to do FOUR HE comics a week, and I am OK (if not somewhat apprehensive) with that. SEATTLE FANCY BASTARDS! Emerald City...

SEATTLE FANCY BASTARDS! Emerald City Comicon is next week!

ECCC is my absolute favorite convention of the year, and it is SHOCKINGLY close to happening nowish. David and I will be at booth #1412 right next to Cyanide & Happiness! I will have the leftover DDDT prints, other prints, books, shirts, Wil Wheaton plushies and...
Scared Straight

Scared Straight

NEWS NEWS NEWS!!! HijiNKS ENSUE finally has a proper About/Characters page, and an Archive page that links to and explains the different types of comics I’ve made over the years. I’ve also updated the Support page. My Patreon hit $750, so starting in April...
To Go, Boldly

To Go, Boldly

Check out these things: My Store, The Sharksplode Store, My Wife’s Geeky Jewelry Etsy Shop. Speaking of supporting HijiNKS ENSUE, I’ve had some very interesting and exciting talks with the guys at Patreon (you might have seen the Google Hangout I did with...
Oh The Distance Is Not Doable

Oh The Distance Is Not Doable

As soon as my daughter realized she could see her own face in the preview window when we Facetime’d, it was all over. I get maybe a half an answer to, “What did you do at school today?” before she just starts mugging for herself and making animal...
The Bell Curve

The Bell Curve

Harry Potter fans: Check out my wife’s new Wizard Duel necklace! She’s also got a Kissing Pacman necklace and Game Of Thrones house necklaces for House Targaryen, House Stark and House Lannister. Having a small child is like having an iPod with a very...
Full Grown Froze Bros

Full Grown Froze Bros

Bro, do you even Frozen? I’m really getting sick of all these “Fake Frozen Kids” wearing all the Frozen shirts and buying up all the Frozen dolls and dressing up in Elsa costumes and POSING like real diehard Frozeholes Brozen* (what REAL, ADULT...
Travel Tips

Travel Tips

My first ever art collaboration with my daughter is here! The “Daddy/Daughter Digital Drawing Time” print is signed by both of us, numbered and limited to 100 pieces. [More details HERE.] All proceeds are going to pay an unexpected IRS tax bill. Your...
All Aboard

All Aboard

As you determine where to spend your hard earned monies this holiday season, might I suggest these fine establishments? The HijiNKS ENSUE Store: Books, Prints, Posters, T-Shirts and more by yours truly! Sharksplode: Geeky T-Shirts by me and Wil Wheaton, made to order!...
If You Leave Me Now

If You Leave Me Now

As you determine where to spend your hard earned monies this holiday season, might I suggest these fine establishments? The HijiNKS ENSUE Store: Books, Prints, Posters, T-Shirts and more by yours truly! Sharksplode: Geeky T-Shirts by me and Wil Wheaton, made to order!...