In Blackest Friday

Just between you and me, I know this comic isn’t actually going up on Friday. One could say it was closer to the subsequent Sunday and one would be totally correct. One could also say that I’ve spent the last 3 days in a gravy and stuffing induced hybernation which would also be intensely accurate.

I had a comic planned for Black Friday some weeks ago that involved a zombie movie-esque scene where retail workers were baracaded in their store, then the deal-frenzied horde would break in and devour the savings. You can’t spell BaRgAINS without… you get the idea. Any who, I thought I was doing pretty good for planning ahead. One less comic I would have to write minutes before I started drawing. I took Thursday off for FAMILYGRAVYSPLODE! and planned to draw the comic on Black Friday. That was until the ridiculous events I had conjured up ACTUALLY OCCURED.

That fact that someone lost their life so a bunch of fuckwastes could “get their savings on” is beyond disgusting. What a pointless death. I really hope the individuals that actually stomped out that persons life, clawing and climbing over each other to save $25 on a George Foreman grill are charged with manslaughter. As soon as the doors came off the hinges, someone should have said, “whoah guys, maybe we should calm the F down.” I guess BluRay players are the new blood diamonds.

Add to that the shooting deaths at a Toys R’ Us the same day and it’s pretty easy to see that we’re doomed. If you really “don’t wanna’ grow up” shoot yourself BEFORE going to a sale at a childrens’ toy store. Ya’ know, cuz their might be CHILDREN there.


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  1. Nice work on Josh clutching the present in the 3rd panel. He seems genuinely upset to listen to Eli ranting, kind of like a small child clutching their stuffed bear (hehe unintended double entendre).

  2. Fuckwaste. That's a kind assessment. The people who trampled or stepped over that poor Wal-Mart employee later had the nerve to bitch when asked to leave the store while police investigated the incident.

    Someone should have just let the employees out, locked the shoppers in and poured deadly gas into the place. We don't need those types breeding any more than they have.

  3. As someone who worked retail on Black Friday, I was frightened to read the reports. I work at a higher end department store, and we had little old ladies literally running into the store at 5am. When one of my coworkers asked "Why are you running?" the closest shopper responded, "Well, dear, I'm really not quite sure" before resuming her sprint.

  4. I heard about both reports. It's sad really. Although the incident at Toys R Us was less about black friday and more about a blood oath to kill each other on sight, still: A shootout at Toys R Us hardly makes you look justified or manly.

    In other news, I spent about 160$ on DVDs and video games and easily saved that much by doing so =D I DIDN'T go stand in line, DIDN'T participate in any group tramplings or maulings, and TOTALLY had an awesome black friday =D

  5. I was disgusted by the Wal-Mart incident as well, I don't know if the story you linked to covered it, but an 8 months pregnant woman was also trampled and lost the baby. Sick shit.

    As for myself, I don't participate in the "capitalism extravaganza". I only left home to go to the comic book store (new Buffy comic y'all!) and the grocery store, 'cause you gots to eat.

    Great job on the comic. I think Josh's look of terror, and the maniacal look in Eli's eyes are extremely well done.

  6. Love the comic, and agree 100% I'm pretty liberal by nature, but I wouldn't have objected if the mayor had called out the national guard to tear gas that walmart and declare martial law. The fact that we're killing each other for 20% off goes beyond insane.

  7. Fortunately, the miscarriage was retracted. She didn't lose the baby. They got her to the hospital, and she's okay. And so is the baby.

  8. When I first heard of the Walmart employee who was killed the first thing I felt was utter disgust. I challenge you to find a better example of mob mentality. Im sure it being a Walmart didnt help. Having worked at one I can tell you that (at least in my area) the customers are almost universally fat stupid rednecks.

    Awesome comic by the way.

  9. I honestly can't comprehend that people would do that to one another.
    I see stereotyped sale shoppers in cartoons and on tv shows, but I didn't think people actually died. Christmas crowds scare me enough to start with, wandering blindly around.
    We don't have Black Friday here, and I'm grateful. 🙁
    If I were a store owner in the US, and I saw this kind of news, I'd think very hard about even opening on Black Friday next year. The danger to customers hardly seems worth it. Even if you cynically look at it sales-wise, it's leading up toe freakin' Christmas, it's hardly a dry spell.

  10. After I heard that and found out people were laughing as the man was sucking down his last breath of air I was so disgusted. How can no one even know cpr. Why didn't they even close the store? I hope they have police and the national guard with riot gear next black Friday considering I know they will never put an end to it. Every store should have them. I mean what else should they be doing at 5 or 4 in the morning anyway.

  11. I never got the purpose of Black Friday to begin with. It may be the biggest earning day of the year for retailers but at the same time with the discounts and payroll the stores lose money. The defense that it encourages customers to shop and come back to the store is bullshit. At the store I work at we had 1 or 2 regular customers show up. The rest were people only there for the deals that won't shop at our store again until possibly the same day next year.

  12. I hit walmart for a $450 laptop. I got it but when two ladies fell over (more due to their own clumsiness and lack of haste then being trampled) everyone stopped, helped them up and then proceeded despite the fact that the other doors to the store had been opened and we were losing time. I'm glad to report that my part of the world still retains basic human decency.

  13. That's exactly what I was thinking, except it was more like, "Awwww, look at scared Josh, he's so cute when he's upset…he needs a hug." I would totally hug Josh if I ever met him. 🙂

    • We thought you were referring to the Green Lantern oath in the title.

      " In brightest day, in blackest night,
      No evil shall escape my sight
      Let those who worship evil's might,
      Beware my power…Green Lantern's light"


    I don't think the government can do anything about it, but at some point retailers should probably stop putting their workers right in the line of fire, or the workers need to walk themselves out of it.

    If I had been awake when this shit happened, I'm not sure I would have been able to not start breaking things (luckily, I would have been able to replace the broken items for 10% off!). The crowd at Long Island literally started chanting "Push the doors in!" and the people in front did, and preceded to trample a man to death. That's a really cheery fucking Christmas, isn't it? I really can't imagine a lower form of vermin then these idiots.

    Yeah, I'm kind of mad right now. Sorry.

  15. thanks for hte kudos and yes, though I do grocery shop at walmart (what can say? its the cheapest) the typical inhabitants scare the shits out of me.

  16. The whole concept of "its the biggest retail day of the year" is bogus anyway. They act as if the shoppers came first and created the need for sales, when its really just an agreement amongst all retail entities to engineer it as the biggest shopping day by offering the crazy sales.

  17. when i was 16 i went shopping on xmas eve for a last minute gift, my car died in an intersection, another car smashed into me and the cop said it was my fault. Best to stay home… always.

  18. I've been trampled before. It's not fun. Your world devolves into trying to hurt as many people as possible so that you can stand back up again, but nothing you ever do seems to quite be enough.

    But yeah, people are lacking in humanity these days.

  19. Since I don't believe in the concept of holidays (due to personal philosophies), I've made it a habit to work every single holiday since I was 15… and let me tell you, I have seen some crazy ass shit go down.

  20. Last Black Friday, I moved my family onto the second floor of our home. After we filled our bathtub and dragged up a few sacks of tinned vegetables and tuna I destroyed the staircase. Let them come!

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