Chapters: Fancy Convention Sketches

Phoenix Comicon 2013 Fancy Sketches Part 2

Go to my store. I promise there is something there you will enjoy owning. In turn, I will enjoy owning your money.

Hey hey! It’s part 2 in my 2 part series of 2 sets of Fancy Sketches from 1 Phoenix Comicon! This set indirectly stars my friend John Scalzi, who is known for his best selling sci-fi novels, his love of churros and his crippling addiction to Coke Zero. I defaced his booth sign along with some other dudes for reasons.

john-scalzi-phoenix-comicon-2013-2

He made this face when he saw it.

john-scalzi-phoenix-comicon-2013-1

 

COMMENTERS: Your favorite author has just become a giant robot. Who is it, are they good or evil and (regardless) do they fight Godzilla?

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Carl· 107 weeks ago

Cool art. 🙂 Wish I could have hit Phoenix.

oh, and FYI. Your site seems to have weird pop-up boxes that glide across the screen, and block your artwork. You may want to punch one of your ad-servers.

Titmouse's avatar

Titmouse · 107 weeks ago

George R.R. Martin…. so hes pretty evil and just kills everone you love just as you really start to think everything is going to be fine!!
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Nakari · 107 weeks ago

H.P Lovecraft.

He’d probably be evil by modern standards. He would fight Godzilla, after taking down the Dutch. Man really hated the Dutch.

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Teri · 107 weeks ago

Philip k Dick ‘bot would probably be good, and he’d eventually figure out that Godzilla is a robot. Then he and Jasper Ffordebot will open a portal into the Southland Tales universe.

The Mark Z Danielewskidroid would be the Tardis.

What would Kafkabot be like?

1 reply · active 107 weeks ago

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zathael · 107 weeks ago

An enormous cockroach, obviously
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Jeremy Thomas· 107 weeks ago

Neil Gaiman. He is (obviously) good and he would clearly not directly fight Godzilla, but rather dazzle him with a cunning plan that would involve something absolutely brilliant.

Also, Wreck-It Doctor and Amy von Schweetz may be my favorite of your Fancy Sketches ever. Or possibly any drawing of all time.

1 reply · active 107 weeks ago

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hijinksensue· 107 weeks ago

Hey thanks! That was the sketch-requesters idea, but I thought it came out pretty great. Actually the Amy was my idea, but hey whatever.
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deadrobot· 107 weeks ago

Asimov! And it would kill outside those pesky laws!
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Leshka · 107 weeks ago

Stephen King would spend 200 pages describing the path that Godzilla took to get to the city (complete with witty banter in it’s head,) then another 100 pages detailing the struggle between good and evil that robot King has to face. And then, because King is bad(ass,) he would team up with Godzilla and oh, so deliciously plunder the countryside, dedicating a good 50 or so pages to the raping of the women.

Yeah, I’m re-reading The Stand and it may be giving me a bias 🙂

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Stephen · 107 weeks ago

Patrick Rothfuss. He would have a beard of writhing cables that would subdue all those who stand against him. He would be good, but misunderstood (probably because of the tentacle similarity to Davey Jones in the Pirate movies). He would fight Godzilla simply because any giant robot worth his salt would, but they would come to an understanding and Godzilla would agree to get a RoboBeer (just oil mostly) with him and teach him the names of all things.
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tomspeelman· 107 weeks ago

Neil Gaiman. Good. And yes. He takes him down through deploying the powers of whimsey to turn Godzilla into a churro-eating, barbeque-providing friendly dinosaur.
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Grimslade · 107 weeks ago

Bran-don Sanderzon would differentiate his robot abilities depending on what fuel it consumed. It would be completely devoid of morality. Good, evil, are judgements by others. The death of Godzilla is only the beginning of the liberation of Monster Island.
I agree that Patrick Borgfuss would wield an electro beard mas grande, making Cthulhu jealous of his facial tentaclular superiority. He would fight Godzilla, but only to subdue him and help him end world hunger.
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zathael · 107 weeks ago

ALL SHALL FEAR THE GEORGE RR MART-TRON!!
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Zach S · 107 weeks ago

Michael Crichton’s family, following the protocol he set out long before his death, reconstitutes his DNA into a artificially supported neural structure his son has spent the last 15 years constructing. At long, long last, he arises, stares at Godzilla and immediately starts postulating scientific reasons how Godzilla came about. After spending a number of hours intrinsically searching to find what really differentiates human nature from that of Godzilla, he realizes that Godzilla isn’t a force of nature, but a result of human nature. He resigns to the fact that Humanity will only destroy itself as he snaps Tokyo Tower in two and takes his place in the natural order.
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Andy · 107 weeks ago

Well you already did Scalzi perfectly. Joe Abecrombe would be an evil robot, covered in spikes and all dark metal. He would join Godzilla in trashing Tokyo. Richard K Morgan would start out not caring but eventually fight Godzilla because it benefited him.

David Brin, Vernor Vinge, Myke Cole would all be good robots. George Martin, Orson Scott Card and Stephen Erikson would all be evil.

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Nick H · 107 weeks ago

Raybot Chandler wakes from his cybernetic slumber and potters around the office, struggling with his programming. The coders wrote an ordered sense of right and wrong but something was off in the assembly. His circuits are corroded by a steady stream of brown liquors and he goes through the motions but can’t seem to muster up the respect for civic authority he should have. The Dame, Pneumattie, crashes through the dingy glass and asks for the third time if he’ll reconfigure her to forget that no good husbot. Problem is, Raybot’s already taken husbot’s dough and can’t bring himself to care which of the two has more corrupt data.
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Kathy J. · 107 weeks ago

Terry Pratchett would be a good guy, ambling along in his thin soled ancient footwear shaking hands with giant doorknobs, and when he meets Godzilla he hires him for the Ankh-Morpork city watch.

1 reply · active 106 weeks ago

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geekygirluk· 106 weeks ago

Godzilla turns out to be particularly good at apprehending deliquent dragons. 🙂 Thanks for saying Pratchett! <3 <3 <3
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Candace · 107 weeks ago

Steven Brust would at first appear to be an evil giant robot, but ultimately turn out to be moderately good in the end. He would not fight Godzilla, but might convince him to jam with Brust’s giant robot band, which might result in the ultimate destruction, entertainment, and/or terrification of all within earshot.
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Ali · 107 weeks ago

Neil Gaiman. Neutral. He wouldn’t fight Godzilla directly, but he’d get him to stop rampaging…by teaching him about subtlety, thus leading to much more disturbing and nightmare-inducing terrorizing of Tokyo. (I mean did you SEE Nightmare in Silver?!)
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Richard · 107 weeks ago

Margaret Weis. She would probably fight Godzilla hut since she wrote all the stories about Draconians from the Dragonlance series, she’d know his reptilian weak spots and send him packing back to the ocean! he would return in the sequel to marry her so they could have Godzilla Jr and her understanding of draconians would make her the best reptile monster mom ever!
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Bryce · 107 weeks ago

Good, bad, everybody fights Godzilla. If you don’t fight Godzilla what’s the point of being a giant robot? What are you going to do, fight second string knock-offs from Sentai shows? Aliens with odd biblical themes that may actually be your mother? Other giant robots from series that are so commingled you don’t know who’s ripping who off when one turns into a jet?

No, screw that. Fight Godzilla, then you can worry about what else you do.

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Tom · 107 weeks ago

David Weber, and he’s good until someone lets him cross genres and mix science fiction with fantasy.
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skoby · 106 weeks ago

Ive got a bad feeling that George RR Martin would trap siblings and force them to do stuff. I think he would kill godzilla eventually but only after godzilla kills everyone you care about.
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DuckAmuck · 106 weeks ago

Douglas Addams, back from the dead as a robot?
I don’t think so much “good” or “evil” as perhaps indifferent, apathetic and possibly depressed. Unless he can telepathically send out radio shows.
But then he’d watch the HHGG movie, and the depression would set in again.

1 reply · active 100 weeks ago

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emperorbailey· 100 weeks ago

Aww, misspelling your favorite author’s name? That’s not right.
I hope that was your phone’s autocorrect.
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Chaucer59 · 102 weeks ago

MechaHarlanEllison fights Godzilla, melting flesh from the giant assembly of lizard bones with a spew of acid from his mouth and then defaces Gojira’s memory by reassembling the bones into a giant penis sculpture.

 

Phoenix Comicon 2013 Fancy Sketches Part 1

The Phoenix Phancy Bastards had some excellent sketch requests this year. Here’s part 1 of a 2 part collection of my favorites. Looks like Gallifrey Comicon might not be too far away since we just discovered Gallifrey.

COMMENTERS: Speaking of Gallifrey Comicon, in what fictional geek genre place would you like to see a comic convention held? What are the panels, the events, etc? Who are the speakers?

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hijinksensue· 107 weeks ago

If anyone wants the original Josh “Powergirl” black and white art, it’s for sale. $30 shipped in the USA.

4 replies · active 107 weeks ago

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Scott · 107 weeks ago

I’d love to get the Josh Powergirl piece. How to get it?
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hijinksensue· 107 weeks ago

Paypal $30 (if you’re in the US) to store at hijinksensue dot com and include your mailing address. Also let me know if I should sign it to anyone.

-Joel

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Scott · 107 weeks ago

Will do, thanks
Scott's avatar

Scott · 107 weeks ago

I don’t see a direct link form that piece, so will “donate” $30 and mention inthe comments what it’s for and where to send it. Thanks!
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Bryce · 107 weeks ago

Moria could be an epic convention hall once they cleaned the place up.
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Adwxxx · 107 weeks ago

PODCAST PLEASE!
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lou · 107 weeks ago

I can see Coruscant hosting a Con, since a planet-covering city just HAS to have a totally bitching convention center. Then again, organizing something that size would be a nightmare.
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Candace · 107 weeks ago

Love the Captain Jacks and the Josh!
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Siirenias · 107 weeks ago

…is that the temporal dimensional pod from 7 Days?
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Charles Foster Kane · 107 weeks ago

So I guess Benedict Cumberbatch plays Khan in the new Star Trek movie? I’m seeing Star Trek tonight because it didn’t open sooner in my country, so that kind of spoils it for me 🙁

1 reply · active 100 weeks ago

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emperorbailey· 100 weeks ago

Yeah, don’t go to geeky American websites until you’ve seen it.
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Andy · 107 weeks ago

If you would make a fancy, weathered-looking print of the Vitruvian Zuul, I would be so happy (and pay you moneystuff for it).

Calgary Expo 2013 Fancy Sketches

I have returned from North of The Wall with a bag full of Canadian “money.” While I recharge my batteries, please to enjoy a few of the fancy sketches I did for the Calgarian Fancy Bastards.

Intense thanks to Keith for hosting me this weekend, driving me around Calgary and being a generally awesome dude. Additional thanks to the Blind Ferret crew for being my convention home base and taking care of business (every day/every way). Even further thanks to David and Wil for three straight nights of beer-fueled bro-down hangouts.

Now If you’ll excuse me, I need to go exchange all this ridiculous pastel, plastic currency for something I can actually spend. CANADIAN MONEY TRIVIA: All Canadian bills feature photos of actors who portrayed The Doctor in the classic Doctor Who series’ (Sylvester McCoy is on the $10), except for the $20 which features Hellen Mirren.

COMMENTERS: Speaking of The Sarlacc, which minor Star Wars character (from any movie, book or game) do you hope gets a starring role in the new Disney regime and why? If you say Jaxxon, I’m going to reunify all the little bits of Alderaan just so I can punch it to death again.

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Skintick · 111 weeks ago

I honestly wouldn’t mind seeing a full length feature on Jabba when he was younger (supposedly a bad-ass), Rogue Squadron, or maybe Boba Fett and that is only because the game was pretty cool.
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nenslo · 111 weeks ago

The gunner who let go the escape pod with R2D2 & C3PO inside. I always wondered if he was aware afterwards that he alone possessed the power to destroy the rebel alliance and the Light side of the force…
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Blarrgl · 111 weeks ago

R5-D4 needs a proper, that is to say canon, day in the sun.
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lou · 111 weeks ago

I’m sure there’s plenty of magic superheroes who act like stage magicians. Take Zatanna, who IS a stage magician in her day job, when she’s not rollin’ with John Constantine and Justice League Dark.
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oneswellfoop· 111 weeks ago

Stage magician superhero?
After “The Incredible Hulk”, Bill Bixby did play (kinda) one in the obviously titled “The Magician”…

“You wouldn’t like me when I’m… PRESTO!!!”

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Ali · 111 weeks ago

Prince Xizor.
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gratch · 111 weeks ago

It’s a little known fact that the design of Canadian money is based entirely around drinking. We color coded our money so that no matter how drunk you are you can still pay and receive change for your beer. Just hand the nice person behind the bar a purple bill and they’ll give you back a blue one and some coins. Frankly, I’ve always felt sorry for you Americans actually having to look at the numbers.

1 reply · active 111 weeks ago

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jiynx · 111 weeks ago

we went ahead and developed these things called ‘credit cards’ and their successor design ‘debit cards’, which function as an electronic key-signature authorizing transfers of money from bank to vendor.

you don’t even need to carry any coins or bills around, either.

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ToxicBlade · 111 weeks ago

Dash Rendar

1 reply · active 111 weeks ago

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ToxicBlade · 111 weeks ago

because that game was awesome back in the day
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lou · 111 weeks ago

When the alt text said “road trip through the Dune Sea”, I thought of a STAR WARS version of Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. I suppose Han Solo and Chewie acted like that in their early smuggling days.

1 reply · active 110 weeks ago

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tom327cat · 110 weeks ago

Chewie took over piloting the falcon. I didn’t tell him about the mynocs. He would find out soon enough, poor bastard.
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Stephen · 111 weeks ago

Fett & Sarlaac: We’re off on the Road to Mos Eisley!
Sarlaac: Your jetpack is chafing my hide! (Fett: Tell me about it)
Sarlaac: Whatever heroes we may face we haven’t any fear.
Fett: Sarlaac will digest them for the next one thousand years!
Fett & Sarlaac: We certainly do get arou-ou-ound!
Fett & Sarlaac: Like Luke and Ben Kenobi, we’re Mos Eisley bound!

1 reply · active 110 weeks ago

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lou · 110 weeks ago

Damn that catchy tune!
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HikingViking · 111 weeks ago

I’d like to see Abrams focus the whole movie on a small group of Imperial Guards who go on a revenge mission to take out high-ranking rebels responsible for blowing up the Death Star. Kind of like Munich, in space.

2 replies · active 110 weeks ago

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xero · 111 weeks ago

wouldn’t that be more Valkyrie in space since they would fail
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lou · 110 weeks ago

“Valkyrie in Space” would be more like a cadre of Imperial Officers plotting to overthrow the Emperor and Vader, which has happened at least couple times in the EU.
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Jay29 · 111 weeks ago

What’s a “site gag?”

1 reply · active 111 weeks ago

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hijinksensue· 111 weeks ago

It’s like a pedantic asshole comment, but different.
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echo · 111 weeks ago

Admiral Piett. He started as Captain and one strangled Admiral and BAMMO promotion!

Wedge would be cool also and perhaps the son of Porkins, Porky.

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Paul Turnbull · 111 weeks ago

Thanks for the most excellent art Joel! When I had Nathan sign it he sat back a bit and said “Who drew this!!” I directed him to you. You’ve successfully helped me to pleasantly startle someone two years in row.

Come back next year so I can add to my growing collection (Am I allowed to call two a collection?) of celebrity signed art drawn by you.

2 replies · active 111 weeks ago

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hijinksensue· 111 weeks ago

Oh you had him sign the “2 captains” drawing? Sweet! Post a pic if you can. I hope he dug it.
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Paul Turnbull · 111 weeks ago

Here’s the “2 Captains” signed:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/turnbull/8703905480/

And from last year Wil Wheaton and the Van signed:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/turnbull/7122978237/

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Liam · 111 weeks ago

Jar Jar Binks
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Mr.Torgue · 111 weeks ago

Kyle Katarn. Abrams may have to rent some explosions from Michael Bay to make it work though.

1 reply · active 111 weeks ago

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hijinksensue· 111 weeks ago

+1 to this! Those games were the most excited I’d been about Star Wars since pre-prequels.
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Siirenias · 111 weeks ago

Not a character? I don’t care. I will watch it if they put an E-Wing in it.

There is no other way I’ll put any more money into this franchise.

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Bill Murphy · 111 weeks ago

I want Luke Skywalker to have a conversation with spirit Yoda.
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CalgaryKeith · 110 weeks ago

Don’t mention it bud! It was a fun weekend.
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Stephen · 110 weeks ago

Thanks to this comic, I am going back and re-reading my expanded universe novels. Might even go back a bit further and read some that I skipped.
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DH8 · 110 weeks ago

I’m hoping the space marine on a unicorn is an obscure reference to the “X-Play Musical”!!
http://www.g4tv.com/videos/15106/x-play-the-music…

1 reply · active 110 weeks ago

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hijinksensue· 110 weeks ago

It is a reference to how a dude asked me to draw a car riding Robocop, riding a unicorn.

Emerald City Comicon 2013 Fancy Sketches

Despite being sick with a cold and feeling like a burlap sack full of gravel and crap all weekend, Emerald City Comicon was still (as always) a fantastically fun and rewarding experience. Any other show and I might have let my illness dampen my spirits but the organizers and attendees of ECCC shine in every way that make a convention great. I cannot stress enough that THIS is the show you need to be saving up for and traveling to from out of state. It’s gotten bigger and better every year and shows no signs of stopping.

I did my very best not infect my fellow cartoonists and the attendees with my virus, but I expect that the CDC will eventually identify me as Patient Zero in what will come to be known as “The Plague of Nations.” Totes sorry, guys LOL. #yolo

COMMENTERS: Have you ever had a trip, event or highly anticipated whatever sidelined by illness? Did you stay home and rest like a sensible human or did you go, stay out until 4am every night partying like a monster then put yourself in contact with 1000’s of people every day like an even bigger monster? Who does that?

Fan Days Dallas 2012 Fancy Sketch

Fan Days Dallas was a good time. Thanks to everyone that came out and bought a thing or a sketch or whatever. It’s nice to be able to do a show near home and sleep in my own bed.

This particular artistic atrocity came from a reader asking for “mad science” themed drawings for his sketch book. He didn’t quite know what to make of it when I handed it over. He gave me this look that simultaneously said “What?” and “Why? Why would you?” Then his voice said those things as well. I’m not sure what Josh has intended for the double pig butt or what he did with the discarded front halves. Perhaps they’re sewn together in the other room, screaming… squealing… in perfect porcine harmony.