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La Mujer Gato y El Luchador Mal

Ewok Stare T-Shirt Close UpThere is a new HE Podcast.
Download episode 77!

You can still order Ultimate Fancy Editions of HE Book 2 AND get your name in the book until I tell you otherwise. Could be a few more days, or longer. Not Sure Yet. There are about 30 left and selling them ALL is super important in order for me to afford the full print run without having to go into the red.

I’m going to finish out the week with Lo-FiJINKS comics so I can focus on some stuff for the book (have you preordered yours yet?).

Personally I really do not care to see Bane in The Dark Knight Rises, but I would love to see Catwoman done well on the big screen. Bruce needs to have a steady “normal” girlfriend who he is trying use to keep himself grounded in the real world, then BAM! Selina Kyle comes along and dickflips his world six ways from Sunday. I love how that particular Batman trope shows the duality of Bruce/Batman. How they are really two different people, which is something we haven’t seen in the Nolan films yet. He’s getting there, but you don’t have true Batman until he’s completely batnipples insane. All of this was perfectly explored in Batman: The Animated Series (which we all know is the best portrayal of Batman in any media).

COMMENTERS: What do you think of the villain choices? What about the actors? Any other characters or stories you would have preferred to see explored? This is probably Bale’s last Batman film. Where should the franchise go from here?

    My Fashion Sense Is Tingling

    HijiNKS ENSUE British Knights Shirt at TopatocoThere is a new HE Podcast.
    Download episode 77!

    You can still order Ultimate Fancy Editions of HE Book 2 AND get your name in the book until I tell you otherwise. Could be a few more days, or longer. Not Sure Yet. There are about 30 left and selling them ALL is super important in order for me to afford the full print run without having to go into the red.

    Coveralls and Corduroys is my combination Deathcab For Cutie/Devo cover band. Speaking of #w00tstock jokes, The regional hockey team fan pictured above is none other than my friend Stephen “Stepto” Toulouse.  He tweeted the inspiration for this comic. He is also the chief banhammer wielder for X-Box Live, and the author of “A Microsoft Life,” a chronicle of his 15 years at a giant company run by nerds. He also told the story that inspired the BARMAGEDDONBECUE.

    Regarding teenage superhero’s costumes and the suspension of disbelief: it isn’t like Peter Park has access to Edna freakin’ Mode from The Incredibles. He has to be his own seamstress, and I don’t think the local Hobby Lobby caries a 60/40 kevlar/carbon nanotube blend. Plus Aunt May probably has a really shitty sewing machine. The bobbin is always loose and the foot pedals hardly work. It would be much more likely that Peter would swing out his bedroom window wearing a patchwork get up made of an old afghan and a few doilies. At best maybe a Uncle Ben would have an old disco speed suit in the attic.

    Even if he could produce this space-flubber suit, have you ever worn a latex mask for any length of time? It’s horrible. It’s like encasing your head in claustrophobia. One time at the mall I put on a full-on Michael Keaton Batman cowl and I nearly had a panic attack. I certainly was in NO MOOD to fight crime. I might have committed a few had the mask not completely blocked my peripheral vision.

    COMMENTERS: What do you think of the new Spider-suit? What about the rumor that new Spidey will have mechanical webshooters? Feel free to comment on those or any of the other stories below.

    Spider-Man News:

    More Super Hero Movie Costume News:

    Paralleloquels

    HijiNKS ENSUE British Knights Shirt at TopatocoThere is a new HE Podcast. Download episode 77!

    You can still order Ultimate Fancy Editions of HE Book 2 AND get your name in the book until I tell you otherwise. Could be a few more days, or longer. Not Sure Yet.

    Feel free to use the new term I’ve invented, “paralleloquels,” to describe any movie that takes place in the same shared universe as it’s predecessor but isn’t a traditional sequel or prequel or threequel or fauxquel. I made that last one up too.

    So Ridley Scott gets Damon Lindelof to rewrite the new Alien film only to have him come back with an original sci-fi screenplay that isn’t an “Alien” story but potentially takes place in the same continuity. Does anyone else get the feeling that Damon Lindelof just tries to solve every tough writing situation with a flash-sideways?  At the end of the film, is the heroine going to stumble, bloodied and beaten, into a space chapel only to find Ripley, Dallas, Bishop, Newt, Bill Paxton and the aliens hugging (or face-hugging) it out just before they embrace the abyss? Speaking of The Abyss, that water monster is probably there too. So are the ocean aliens from Deep Star Six, Kyle Reese and Wilfred Oatmeal McDiabeteStache from Cocoon.

    COMMENTERS: Now that they aren’t doing the prequel, let’s speculate on what it should have been about? Also, let’s figure out what  movies would have been better franchise mashup partners with Alien than Predator. How about Look Who’s Talking? The aliens could have cutesy comments finding their own tails while still gestating in their human hosts. Of course Jon Travolta and Kirstie Alley would return. They’re both Scientologists so playing host to alien organisms is already part of their day to day lives.

    Old Friends, Familiar Faces

    HijiNKS ENSUE British Knights Shirt at TopatocoThere is a new HE Podcast. Download episode 77!

    You can still order Ultimate Fancy Editions of HE Book 2 AND get your name in the book until I tell you otherwise. Could be a few more days, or longer. Not Sure Yet.

    I don’t mind Frodo being added to The Hobbit, despite the fact that he would have been a some kind of halfling larva during the events of the books. Now that Peter Jackson is at he helm I do not fear for the quality of the movie in the least. Where Tolkien is concerned, Peter Jackson can do no wrong. He took plenty of liberties with the Lord of the Rings trilogy in adapting them for film and I would say the stories were no worse for the ware. Forget that entire plot points, even entire chapters were left out of the films, there were plenty of times when a certain character;s actions were just attributed to a completely different character. Again, not a problem as long as Jackson is doing the driving. I firmly believe his editing, character alterations and scene deletion/combing are the only reasons LOTR was even filmable. To film the story as Tolkien wrote it would have been like trying to make a movie out of the assembly instructions for a Metalunan Interocitor.

    Though I wouldn’t be surprised of the addition of Frodo had been a request from the studio. I can see the suits giving Jackson notes like, “Who was that little guy from the last 3 pictures? Frildo? Franco? Was it James Franco? The kid with the arm? Get him  back! We need the little guy or people won’t know what movie they’re watching! And what about this dragon? Can he be less Reign Of Fire and more How to Train Your…? We need something cute for the kiddos. Ok, what about that Narnia beaver? Kids love beavers! And are we married to this Gandalf? Can we get a different wizard? Get Disney on the phone and see if those Waverly Place kids have passports! And check IMDB and let me know if any of the Dumbledores are still alive. We need wizard options people!”

    Bad Astrologer

    Preorder HijiNKS ENSUE Book 2!!!TIME IS NEARLY UP!!!!!:
     This is your LAST WEEK to order an Ultimate Fancy Edition of Book 2 AND get your name in the book. Files go to the printer on January 15th. After that you will still be able to order a UFE but you will NOT necessarily be listed in the book on the Fancy Bastard Wall Of Fancy Fame.
    ORDER THAT MOTHER FANCY BOOK, YO!

    Don’t want a stupid book? Check out The HE Store!

    Bad news guys. The addition of a 13th Zodiac sign means you might have been reading the wrong horoscope for your entire life. Also you might have been reading horoscopes and believing them for your entire life which is additional (and more severe) bad news. It also means that Zodiac Killer should have killed at least one more person. This story is just full of missed opportunities.

    Back to the Battlestar Galactica comparison for a minute: If you read the article linked below where the astronomer that started this whole thing explains the 13th celestial position, or whatever, he mentions that it is caused by a change in Earth’s orbit and relative position to other celestial bodies that cycles every 26,000 years. This has all happened before, amiright? And this will all happen again? Huh? Huh? I think my theory holds up.

    Question for you BSG fans: Concerning the series Finale [SPOILERS], if modern scientists discovered Hera’s bones (the famous Australopithecus “Lucy” skeleton) and she was still 3 and a half feet tall, doesn’t that mean she died shortly after they reached Earth2? Did anyone else catch that or am I missing something? Puts even more of a downer on the finale. “Hey guess what? All those crazy mysteries? Space Angels. Also the baby died. See ya!”