IMPORTANT REMINDER!
HijiNKS ENSUE just turned 8 years old!
(*COUGH! COUGH! Obligatory links to Patreon, donation page and wishlist *COUGH!)
Also HijiNKS ENSUE has moved to a once a week update schedule and is ending in 2016 is on hiatus while I work on how and when to end it properly.
Read more about the end of HijiNKS ENSUE HERE.
ALSO ALSO I am launching a new comic on JUNE 1st!!! Stay tuned for info and a link.
Also also also, I am going to be at Phoenix Comicon as part of Cyanide & Happiness this weekend. Details HERE.
This is mostly a transcript of a real conversation. I got SO EXCITED when we came up with “Hermione Danger,” but Emily’s league has rules against duplicate names even if the other person is 40 states away. I also have to confess that our daughter came up with “J.K. Rolling” after I suggested “J.K. Brawling.” Kiddo plans to start in a kids derby league this summer. They don’t really get to bought. They just learn the rules, the skating and practice eternally until they’re 11 years old (the legal age for smashing into people on roller skates). There’s a guy in Emily’s league whose name is “Problems” and he’s number 99. That’s pretty clever.
Ginny Wheelsy?
Professor McGonnaclobberyou?
Severus Skate?
Cho Bang?
Madam H-ouch?
Nymphadora Thunks?
Madam RoseHurta?
Balla'Tricks Deranged
Ariana Rumbledore
Bathilda Ribshot
Fleur de la Cruel
No love for Draco? I thought this was a site filled with gothic high school girls! I bid you all good day!
… I SAID GOOD DAY.
I figured that if two roller derby players with the same derby name met, they would simply fight to the death. The internet really is runing everything.
In a just world, this would be the case.
Two teams enter on team leaves
Whomping Willow Rosenberg is perfect!
If it's too obscure, then there's most likely a chance it's available
Don't limit yourselves to one writer—Brust: Sethra Explode…Moon: Paksenarrion Slashnslaughter…Weber: Donar Harrington…Martin: The Great and Powerful BodyChecker.
Ginny Wheelsey!
If there's a guy named "Problems" with the number 99, then I'm hoping that whoever gets the number 1 crosses the number out and calls themself "The Bitch".
How about names based on real people?
Princess Die
Nikki Triage
Kim Killdashian
Margaret Thrasher
Calamity Pain
Sigorney Reaper
Smashley Judd
Smashley Judd is my favorite.
I like your names better than all of the fictional names!
I like Calamity Pain and Sigourney Reaper (or Ripper).
Diagon Sally
OH MY GOD.
Diagon Sally,
think you better slow your Diagon down…
You been castin\’ spells all over town…
Knocturn Sally works too
I think I just officially crossed the barrier into Old. It took me a good ten seconds to realize that the #99 "Problems" thing wasn't an obscure Gretzky reference I was failing to grok.
It's safe to assume I am never talking about hockey.
Pity
Rolldemort! (aka The Skater Who Shall Not Be Named)
That'll teach me not to read them all before posting.
Lord Wheeldemort
Whomping Willow Rosenberg may just be the best pun name I have ever read.
Does the name have to be based on a Harry Potter character? Or a woman? The first name that came to my warped little mind was this:
Killbo Baggins!
Another one:
Break-a-legolas!
Frodown or elrend
Sirius Blackout/Blackeye.
Murdering Myrtle
I remember when one of my friends finally started derby-ing (that's totally a reall word, right?) in Austin and the Facebook posts for weeks and weeks went back and forth between I don't know how many people trying to come up with a name for her (she ended up as Bessie Mae Mucho).
That is a great name! My friend started doing roller derby as Battle E. Portman, which made me realize that I can't join roller derby because I'm bad at puns.
Die Anna val hella carmaggedon reference
OH
JUSTINE FLINCH-FLESHWOUND
Captain Scarbuck
Riveter Tamm
Zoë CrashNburn
Mortician Addams
I'm waiting for somebody to take the derby name Wingardium Furiosa.
Holy shit, that\’s rad.
Also, it\’s Furi-OH-sa, not Furio-SAH.
Or go Doctor Who
Amelia Pound
Ripper Song
Sara Jane Smash
etc.
"Ripper Song " was one of her original choices. I can't remember if it was taken or if she just gave up on it.