The Day After Yesterday

CRUISE FUNDRAISER [UPDATE 01/04/13]: 96/100 prints are sold and it would be great to sell that last few remaining prints before the the cruise. I am also going to leave up the additional prints and print packs for sale until probably February in case you want to get in on that action.

Prints are being ordered now and will hopefully start shipping by mid January.

What Eli doesn’t realize is how thoughtful Josh was actually being with his power saw tossing experiment. Had Eli’s extra fingers been severed and had they grown back, everyone would be satisfied in the knowledge that they could go out and (at least for a couple of hours) pull some pretty sweet “fingers got chopped off” pranks. If they didn’t grow back, then Eli would have no fewer fingers than he had the day before. And trust me, he wasn’t stomping around yesterday all in a huff, lamenting his lack of additional digits.

For guys like Joel and Josh who play guitar or piano, I bet the extra fingers are really filling in some gaps in the ol’ musical skill sets. Before man had five fingers, I’m sure the piano seemed like a cruel test left on Earth by ancient aliens in the late 80’s to frustrate humanity into early extinction. Dumb ancient aliens. Always leaving shit on planets for people to have incredibly stupid ideas about.

I wonder if Juan Q. Zach survived. I mean he WAS at the epicenter of a worldwide BLOODQUAKE, and that’s not really the sort of thing you just shake off. Still, he seemed a resilient beast, and the most likely HE character to eventually be made into a plush doll, so… I bet we see him again.

Well, this comic ends the current storyline, all of the comics for 2012 and what will eventually become HE book 5. I hope you’ve enjoyed this indulgence of continuity as much as I enjoyed creating it. Hell, I hope you enjoyed this entire year of comics, and perhaps even a select few of the years preceding it.

Thanks for letting me do this amazing job for another year. How about we make a deal to keep up our individual ends of this bargain (I make stuff, give it away for free and sometimes you buy stuff or give me money or send me a nice email or whatever) for at least another year? Cool? Cool.

COMMENTERS: What physical enhancement from fiction (augmented body part, extra body part, etc) do you feel you would most benefit from and why? I remember this old episode of the 90’s Outer Limits series (or it totally could have been John Carpenter’s Body Bags) where this dude gets injected with nanites and they start to interpret his inability to breath under water or see behind himself as biological deficiencies and they start growing him gills, extra eyes, etc. It’s basically The Fly without all the vomiting on donuts and Goldbluming all over the place.

The Digital Transition

CRUISE FUNDRAISER [UPDATE 12/31]: 95/100 prints are sold and it would be great to sell that last few remaining prints before the end of the year. I am also going to leave up the additional prints and print packs for sale until probably February in case you want to get in on that action.

Prints are being ordered now and will hopefully start shipping by mid January.

Throw our your gloves and stock up on pinky rings! The hands of the world are born anew in BLOOD! So that was Juan Q. Zach’s plan all along? Not to drown the world in blood in order to cleanse the disease that is man from it’s surface, but to drown the world in blood so we could all type faster. Ooh! I bet diminished 7th chords are WAY easier to play on the guitar now. Plus if you have something stuck in your ear, that new little finger’s really going to just get right in there and fish it out. I mean, sure, probably like 80 to 90% of the world’s population died in THE BLOOD WAVE, but for those that are left… bonus finger!

About halfway through planning out this storyline, I was talking to my friend, and oftentimes art mentor, Lar about how my art had progressed over the last year. He pointed out some things I was doing right, and a few areas that I needed to work on, and then gave me a Canadian tongue lashing (which is similar to an American tongue lashing, but it’s far more polite, has better public schools and is slathered in cheesy gravy) for still drawing my characters with four fingers.

I never made a conscious decision to draw them that way. Cartoons just HAD four fingers as far as I was concerned, always had and always would. Of course I HAD thought about the dozens of times I’d run into problems trying to illustrate semi-realistic human anatomy when all of my characters were missing 20% of their digits. Gesturing, the holding of things, the size of the hand coming off the wrist, all of these things were problems more often than not. That’s when Lar forced me to have an artpiphany. It’s my comic and I can do what I want. BAM! The Blood Wave forces everyone to evolve four new tiny appendages. Done and done.

Tags: Juan Q. Zach, Storyline: This Is The Beginning Of The End

…To The End

CRUISE FUNDRAISER [UPDATE 12/31]: 94/100 prints are sold and it would be great to sell that last few remaining prints before the end of the year. I am also going to leave up the additional prints and print packs for sale until probably February in case you want to get in on that action.

How about a direct follow up to this cliffhanger… er, bloodhanger… blood wave? Yes, from now on the phrase “cliffhanger” will be replaced outright with the phrase “blood wave.” Write that down in case you forget.

COMMENTERS: WHY AREN’T WE ALL DEAD?! The apocalypse just came and went, not a blood wave in sight. Did The Doctor save us? Did the Scoobies prevail yet again? STEPTO WARNING: LOST SPOILERS AHEAD!!! Are we actually all dead like in the final season of LOST (even though the producers of LOST told us from THE BEGINNING that they WEREN’T ALL DEAD [those motherfuckers])?

Tags: Juan Q. Zach, mayan apocalypse, quetzalcoatl, Storyline: This Is The Beginning Of The End

All Blood Things Must Come…

CRUISE FUNDRAISER [UPDATE 12/22]: 90/100 prints are sold and it would be great to sell that last 10 remaining prints before the end of the year. I am also going to leave up the additional prints and print packs for sale until probably February in case you want to get in on that action.

Bid on an auction to APPEAR IN A HIJINKS ENSUE COMIC! It’s for charity! The auction ends TODAY!!!

COMMENTERS: Meteors, polar shifts, solar flares, eaten by demon snakes with your grandmother’s face… there’s LOTS of ways to get your armagedd-on. Of all the various apocali in movies, tv, books, etc., which would you prefer for your going out in a proverbial or possibly literal blaze of glory?

If you want to support HijiNKS ENSUE’s ability to have a merry Santaween and you don’t feel like donating or buying any merch… HELL, why not just check out my Amazon Wishlist? Who’s going to stop you? Not me.

Tags: Juan Q. Zach, martin freeman, mayan apocalypse, quetzalcoatl, Storyline: This Is The Beginning Of The End, tumblr

Wheaton Comic Dare: We Have To Go Back!

CRUISE FUNDRAISER: 85/100 prints are sold and it would be great to sell that last few remaining prints before the end of the year. I am also going to leave up the additional prints and print packs for sale until probably February in case you want to get in on that action.

Hey Sci-Fancy Bastards! Syfy Tv Movie Title Generator Shirts are almost gone from the HE store for good and they’re CRAZY CHEAP! Men’s are down to Sm and Med. Ladies sizes are more abundant.

You guys know the Weaton Comic Dare drill by now. He dared, Stepto jumped in, I responded and did my cartoonistly duty. Everybody wins. This comic hits a little too close to home. The home which I never leave. The home in which I rarely change out of my pajamas. The very same home where I go to bed at 7am and start my day around 3m. This is a weird job. Freelancers know what I’m talking about. Putting on pants just causes problems. Like having to know where pants are, or how to clean them. Serious problems.

Bid on an auction to APPEAR IN A HIJINKS ENSUE COMIC! It’s for charity! Only 4 days left!
And only 1 day left to bid on this sweet Webcomics Jam Poster.

My desire to prevent my friends from being dissappointed by LOST is the same as Lord Elrond’s desire to save his daughter Arwen from toiling in a mortal life only to die, when eternal paradise is only a boat ride away. The irony is he WANTED her to go the island. I’m trying to keep as many people off the Island as possible. It’s not that there was NOTHING to enjoy about LOST. In fact the first 3.5 seasons are some of the finest TV that’s every been TV’d. The problem is the steeeeeeeep drop in quality halfway through the 3rd season that just continually plummets to a dismal and unsatisfying conclusion. If you have the willpower (and most don’t) to watch the first 3.5 seasons then pretend it was cancelled, you might end up being the happiest geek alive. All of your questions will still never be answered, but at least you don’t have to experience the half-hearted nonsense of the back half of the show.

COMMENTERS: When I found out my friend Stepto was going to crash his plane into the island, I tried to sum up what was about to happen to him via Twitter. Turns out it only took 4 tweets. Have you ever tried to stop a friend from delving into disappointing geekery? Did they do it anyway? Did they love it, despite you? WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOUR FRIEND!?

Tags: lost, scifi, stephen "stepto" toulouse, Storyline: This Is The Beginning Of The End, tv, wheaton comic dares