Passive. Aggressive.


The HijiNKS ENSUE Store is all new looking and such, and all ladies shirts are $5 off! 

 I have dreamed a dream, but now that dream is gone from me. It’s hard not to take it personally when you have such a specific plan for your favorite geeky movie or show and it seems like Hollywood or the BBC or the Universe in general just isn’t paying attention to that plan. It’s even worse when you find out how close the Universe’s plan was to your own. It’s worse when you find out out you could have had it all

COMMENTERS: When I was a kid we were rarely privy to information such as casting rumors. Hell, we were rarely privy to information at all by today’s standards. What ill-fated casting rumor did you most hope was true? What geeky movie or show suffered from the worst casting? The best? 

The 2013 DIGITAL FANCY SKETCH DRIVE is still going through the end of next week! Check out the details and order yours HERE.

MY WIFE KEEPS MAKING AWESOME STUFF! My wife has also started making super cool, ultra geeky jewelry on Etsy. You can see her Tetris necklace and more geeky creations in her shop, but she just announced her Harry Potter inspired Quidditch necklace. Check out dat Quaffle!  

quidditch necklace

Comments (75)

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He’s riffing on the “Let go and let God” slogan.
Bruceski's avatar

Bruceski · 96 weeks ago

“Ain’t no law that says a dog can’t be a timelord.” — Air Bud 12, as told by Rifftrax Live.
TheWatcher's avatar

TheWatcher · 96 weeks ago

Isn’t “rooting for a black doctor” just as bad as rooting for a white doctor?

Can’t we just hope that part is cast well, regardless of skin colour?

16 replies · active 96 weeks ago

TheWatcher's avatar

TheWatcher · 96 weeks ago

Irrelevant. Just because there hasn’t yet been one does not make having one preferable *if* there is someone better for the part.
Breaking racial barriers is important whether its in sports, politics or entertainment. Also the “if there’s someone better for the job” is an old argument that’s been used by “I’m not racist, but I’m just sayin’l racists for years.
MichaelH's avatar

MichaelH · 96 weeks ago

It’s still odd everyone wanting a black or female doctor to be written by a white male. Shouldn’t we be wishing for the next showrunner/head writer to be the black/female (or both) who would in turn produce the diversity needed? It worked with the previous gay showrunner who opened the door to Doctor Who happily including characters of any sexuality desired.

While it’s nice Moffat has entertained widening the role, it’s also good that in the end he’s choosing to write the Doctor he knows rather than trying to force a new aspect of the Doctor just for the sake of it.

And the next showrunner is possibly the (respectful) campaign to wage now. After all, Davies was getting ready to leave and we didn’t even know it by about now!

UnderTheDark's avatar

UnderTheDark · 96 weeks ago

You know what, you make a fantastic point. I would be SO much more excited to hear about a new, non-misogynistic/”color-blind” show runner… if you think that women and minorities are under-represented IN FRONT of the camera, well Mississippi-godDAMN take a look behind!
TheWatcher's avatar

TheWatcher · 96 weeks ago

I would be nice to see a black doctor, but saying I’m “rooting” for it seems to me to be going to far…

I really hope the show-runners are colour-blind both ways when casting. I’m sure that they have a vision of what the doctor should be and frankly I’d be disgusted if that vision includes a race. (And in fact, we know it doesn’t. Since a black man has been offered the part before.)

If a white guy got the job over a black guy because they think he’ll be a better doctor – that better fits how they want to develop the character – so be it. The same goes for age, sex – whatever.

“Also the “if there’s someone better for the job” is an old argument that’s been used by “I’m not racist, but I’m just sayin’l racists for years.”

It’s funny, because I’m black. (Well, my mother is anyway.) But come on. Attack my argument, fair enough. But don’t use it as an excuse to lump me in with those assholes.

TheWatcher's avatar

TheWatcher · 96 weeks ago

I mean if you were just rooting for Chiwetel Ejiofor, I could understand it more. Chiwetel Ejiofor is fucking awesome.
It’s not just that they’re black, I think Cheesewheel and Idris would both be friggin awesome at the gig. But it’s not about wanting “Black” or “white” it’s about wanting “different”. Asian, woman or ginger would be cool too. though not an asian woman ginger. That might be weird.
Does she have a British accent? Gender, race and folcile-bending I’ll wholeheartedly endorse, but I’ll not have my doctors be other than British.
Hotsauce's avatar

Hotsauce · 96 weeks ago

As I said on the last comic, there is no one “best actor” for any role. Acting is pretty much the only profession where a black woman who nailed her audition for the Power Rangers can be told she didn’t get the role because “we already have a black actor”. So it’s naive to the border of incredulity to say “color doesn’t matter as long as it’s the best actor” whenever “someone who isn’t white” is mentioned as a casting possibility.
Dukes of Hazard.
When Coy and Vance joined the show. No, at least they were acknowledged to not be Bo and Luke. But C’MON!
Love the word Alcoholabetes by the way. 😉
Ron's avatar

Ron · 96 weeks ago

I was dreading Heath Ledger as the Joker. All I could picture was Ten Things I Hate about you. It was going to be horrible. Then I watched it. I couldn’t have been more wrong. Since then I don’t judge who gets cast for whatever role.

1 reply · active 96 weeks ago

I had never seen his previous works, but I was similarly skeptical. Holy shit was I wrong.
Paul's avatar

Paul · 96 weeks ago

Used to love the show Sliders, especially with the original cast. I was not the least bit perturbed when they replaced Sabrina Lloyd as the token female/love interest with Kari Wuhrer. I was, however, a bit annoyed when they replace Jerry O’Connell with his lesser brother, Charlie. The dynamic was completely obliterated and the show lost a lot of something, including me as a viewer after a few episodes.

4 replies · active 96 weeks ago

I caught a really late in the series episode one night about a month ago and the entire cast has been replaced (more than once over) and only Rembrandt was left. Charlie O’ wasn’t even there. It was some other random dude who apparently was a shitty clone of Quinn or something.
That was the last season when Jerry focused on directing. The finale was anticlimactic, too
I suggest you watch the finale to find out
Richard Ayoade. Would have been brilliant. So much of a long shot that it was fun to think about. But Neil Gaiman says that he knows a black actor who was offered the Doctor and turned it down.

1 reply · active 96 weeks ago

That would have been bananapants awesome.
DuckAmuck's avatar

DuckAmuck · 96 weeks ago

I just want a maple bacon vodka pancake batter smoothie.
It seems everything would be fine if I had one of those…

What if I went crazy and made PANCAKES out of it! Oh, the awesomeness…

1 reply · active 96 weeks ago

So, being that you have free will, i suggest you start collecting ingredients.
I don’t know who decided Topher Grace should be Venom, but they deserve nothing less than being thrown in Sarlacc’s pit.

4 replies · active 96 weeks ago

Canadian Spider-Man's avatar

Canadian Spider-Man · 96 weeks ago

Topher Grace should have been Peter Parker. Tobey McGuire was completely miscast. During That 70s Show, I swore he would make the PERFECT Peter, and then the Spider-Man movies happened, and Tobey was an emotionless robot. And then they finally get Topher, but he’s Eddie Brock..
Bruceski's avatar

Bruceski · 96 weeks ago

When I went to see Gatsby my main comment was “how come when Tobey Maguire is shy and awkward it’s painful, but when DiCaprio does the same kind of thing it’s endearing?” The answer of course is “because one of them’s a good actor.”
I think it was definitely different back in the day before the Internet…we would just watch the show, take what we got and either kept watching or stopped.

I remember reading about Lucas’s 9 Star Wars plan, being all excited and then wondering if we were ever going to get Episodes I-III.

HikingViking's avatar

HikingViking · 96 weeks ago

I think the best fantasy movie casting I’ve ever really noticed was Julie Walters being cast as Molly Weasley. After watching her play Mrs. Wilkinson, I couldn’t imagine a better actress to play someone so fiercely protective and maternal. But honestly, I think her acting chops (along with many of the actors and actresses in the franchise) had their talents wasted – or at least not utilized to the fullest. Alan Rickman being a very notable exception. At the other end of the spectrum, the worst casting ever was Tom Cruise and Brad Pitt being cast in Interview With the Vampire.

3 replies · active 96 weeks ago

That whole series is full of just sublime casting choices. Hagrid, Snape, pretty much all of the teachers… just fantastic.
Stonemaven's avatar

Stonemaven · 96 weeks ago

Re Interview:
I read the book as a kid and always pictured Sting (circa Dune) as Louis and Rutger Hauer (circa Ladyhawk) as Lestat and maybe Mathew Broderick as Armand. If it had been made into a movie back then at the time, it would have been perfect. I was horrified when Pitt and Cruise were announced even though my ideal actors were too old by that time.
I had heard that Patrick Stewart was rumored to play Mr. Freeze in ‘Batman and Robin’. I was hoping that it was him instead of Arnold Schwarzenegger.

4 replies · active 96 weeks ago

in retrospect, arent you glad it wasnt him?
Liam's avatar

Liam · 96 weeks ago

Considering how “Batman and Robin” turned out yes I’m glad but at the time I was disappointed because I think Patrick Stewart could be a good Mr. Freeze.
Just imagining it is giving me waking nightmares. I must wash Batman and Robin from my mind.
bucketofarrows's avatar

bucketofarrows · 96 weeks ago

Nathan Fillion as Nathan Drake. He even said he wanted the role. When I heard it was Wahlberg and the weird direction they were going I died a little inside and then felt relieved when the whole thing got scrapped.

HikingViking, another exception was Maggie Smith I thought.

1 reply · active 96 weeks ago

Ali's avatar

Ali · 96 weeks ago

I was hoping for David Tennant as Thranduil, honestly, back in like 2010 when Hobbit casting rumors were first floating around. And I was pleased by the Nimoy as Smaug casting rumor, but far more pleased by the reality of Cumbersmaug.
groklife's avatar

groklife · 96 weeks ago

Late 80’s/early 90’s: I was so ready for Pierce Brosnan to be Agent 007.
Instead, we got Timothy Dalton. Nothing wrong with Timothy Dalton, but HE WASN’T Pierce Brosnan!

Of course, then I got Pierce Brosnan. Be careful what you wish for. I thought he was crap in his four Bond movies.

Daniel Craig is fantastic, imho.

Hotsauce's avatar

Hotsauce · 96 weeks ago

In the early 90s, rumor had it that Robert DeNiro was being cast as Wolverine. I could not and can not imagine it.
Liam's avatar

Liam · 96 weeks ago

Here is a good one. Nicolas Cage as Superman.
Mr. T is still alive. That recent A-Team movie should have had him as Mr. T! I don’t care if he has aged; it should have been.

I don’t really know enough to figure out how to get in on the casting rumor mill, though.

2 replies · active 96 weeks ago

He has NOT aged. He is ageless.
The Unknown FB's avatar

The Unknown FB · 96 weeks ago

Enough of your jibber-jabber…Mr. T is a closeted Time Lord!
He pities those who fool with his TARDIS!
Tony's avatar

Tony · 96 weeks ago

There was a rumor that Christopher Eccleston was going to find his way into Game of Thrones (I want to say as Balon Greyjoy, but I could be mistaken), and this was right after my second time watching his run as the Doctor (you know, the time after you’ve seen the Tennant years and the beginning of Smith’s run, and you’re rewatching everything and you realize how much more brilliant Eccleston’s Doctor was than you initially gave him credit for), and I was excited to see him doing anything, but especially something as cocainesque as Game of Thrones. Sure, even he probably couldn’t have saved Balon Greyjoy from the massively petty stupid that Georgr R. R. Martin originally imbued the character with (seriously, what the fuck is the point of invading the North when the Lannisters probably can’t afford to thoroughly defend the wealthiest castles in the country from the sea because two of the people that want to claim their Iron Throne are like two days’ sail from attacking the capital?), but it doesn’t change the fact that I would really love to see Mr. Eccleston on screen again in something I’m going to watch…

2 replies · active 96 weeks ago

Eccleston is fantastic! It would have been awesome to see him in Game of Thrones! But he will be in Thor 2! So don’t give up on him.
Kirby's avatar

Kirby · 96 weeks ago

People really don’t give Eccleston’s doctor enough credit. Of the three, “modern” doctors he’s probably my favorite.

I was squeeing my little fanboy brain out when I heard that Matt Smith wanted to do a crossover between them. <3 I so so very very disappointed that it never happened. *crosses fingers* Another 5 doctors, another five doctors

Bubbalouey's avatar

Bubbalouey · 96 weeks ago

Erm… Didn’t you only just start watching doctor who last year?

2 replies · active 96 weeks ago

lou's avatar

lou · 96 weeks ago

I think he’s been mainlining old episodes in between seasons.
Canadian Spider-Man's avatar

Canadian Spider-Man · 96 weeks ago

I was hoping for an older man to play the Doctor. Skin color didn’t matter. I got what I wanted!

1 reply · active 96 weeks ago

Bruceski's avatar

Bruceski · 96 weeks ago

Now I’m imagining Bill Nye as The Doctor. Someone would ask “how are the Daleks doing this” and he’d get halfway through an explanation full of props and sound effects before they got killed because they forgot to run.
meagankn's avatar

meagankn · 96 weeks ago

THAT NECKLACE! GIVE IT TO ME FOR TO PUT ON MY NECKLACE PLACE! I’m throwing all my dollars in a vaguely Southeastern direction which means, given a good head wind, they should reach you from Seattle in about a week. Then necklace, please? Yes. Thanks. `
I think i remember hearing Coin Firth wanting to be a villain in Doctor Who. I could be mistaken here but he said something that he wanted to play a bad guy.

As for the new casting of the Doctor, I’m excited that they’ve gone back to a mature actor, I saw some of Tom Baker’s Doctor and he was brilliant in that! But I get that people want something different, i myself am tired of the love struck companions and would love to see an alien companion for a change.

Bruceski's avatar

Bruceski · 96 weeks ago

When I was a kid I think every year we had a new rumor about an Ender’s Game movie with various people in various roles. This was back when the internet was AOL and I didn’t have political awareness, so it was possible to actually enjoy an Orson Scott Card book without feeling slimy.
Kirby's avatar

Kirby · 96 weeks ago

Green Lantern’s hasn’t been brought up in here? Interesting.

I like Ryan Reynolds. He might not be in a lot of the best movies, but I don’t think he was right for… well, any of the human lanterns I can think of off the top of my head. At least he should have been a -funny- character. Flash, for example.

It’s kind of like having a movie with Bane and casting a muscle bound hulk as Mr. Freeze instead.

You all know what I’m talking about.

Chaucer59's avatar

Chaucer59 · 95 weeks ago

Some of Enterprise was excellent. As long as they were just filling in back story, it was fine. Where they went to hell was in adding whole empires of aliens we’d never seen in Star Trek. That just stretched hell out of audience credulity.

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Sherlocked And Loaded


My wife and I shotgunned Sherlock series 1 and 2 in three days. It wouldn’t have taken THAT long if she hadn’t insisted on feeding, caring for and paying attention to our child. A child who can almost open a the Pop-Tarts box by herself which essentially makes her self sufficient. When we finished the series I felt that strange mix of relief and anticipation that comes with totally immersing yourself in a particular fiction for days at a time. You’re satisfied to have completed your goal, but anxious for there to be more of it. More to consume. When something is THAT good, waiting months for new installments is like… well, it’s almost like a REAL problem. Which it is not. Still… HURRY UP AND GET ME BACK TO 221B BAKER STREET! There’s mysteries what need solvin’!

I feel like Sherlock’s immensely impressive powers of deduction would be wasted on someone like me who rarely leaves the house other than to run simple errands or go to the airport, and who posts nearly every detail of his goings on to the Internet. He’d step foot in my dwelling (presumably where I had either just been murdered or been accused of such), rapidly flash across the items lying about – my suitcase (still packed from my last convention), my office (the room where I keep my piles of things), the couch with a big my-ass-shaped divot in it and me with my makes-British-look-Jamaican skin tone) – mumble, “Booorrrring,” under his breath and let D.I. Lestrade take it from there. Then he’d go convince Watson to let him shoot a cadaver off his head with a canon and torment his brother Minecraft Mycroft until an interesting case presented itself.

I had a friend in my early 20’s that reminds me of Sherlock. He was smarter than EVERYONE in the room and was exceedingly frustrated with how much less intelligent everyone was than him. Of course this just made him seem arrogant and callous, when in fact he was just struggling to figure out how to relate to regular dumb people. He was the kind of guy that would give away all of his possessions then not have money for rent, or sell his car to pay for school, then skip all of his classes to read books about obscure, unused programming languages and small mammals. He was also one of my favorite people in the world. He even looked quite a bit like Cumberbatch. The only point to share all of that with you is to convey that one of the reasons I fell in love with the show Sherlock mere minutes after starting it (regardless of it’s incredible cast, superb writing, and sublime character development) was that I felt like I knew this guy and instantly understood what made him tick. I wondered if Moffatt had a friend like mine who inspired Sherlock or if he was just a culmination of his understanding of the human condition.

COMMENTERS: Feel free to share your thoughts on Sherlock. Did you ever know anyone like Sherlock who simply can’t relate to regular, stupid humans? Are you going to watch the US Sherlock show, Elementary, with Lucy Liu and the guy from Hackers? Well, don’t. It’s going to be terrible. What series did you watch via dvd, streaming or other bulk means that you simply couldn’t stop watching? “Just one more episode…”