Momentum

Momentum

I might have already written about this story here, but a little over a decade ago I saw a dude refuse to leave a customer service line at Walmart the day after Christmas until they agreed to refund him for a dozen or so bottles of perfume that were NOT purchased at...
Better The Dirt Devil You Know

Better The Dirt Devil You Know

COMMENTERS: You already know Eli’s. What is YOUR “mating call.” Alternately, what is the “song of your people.” When my Patreon reaches $2000/month I’m going to release a new podcast where upon I interview my 7 years old daughter as...
Gross Up Close

Gross Up Close

My friend Kris, got me a present. Two presents actually. The first was a USB microscope. He had seen how much I enjoyed playing with his: (putting it on my keyboard to see all the weird gunk and hairs and garbage that sits undetected between the keys and the cavities...
No Fate But What We Make

No Fate But What We Make

Better we teach our children to fear the machines, before the machines teach them for us. Do you think Sarah Connor told little John bedtime stories about princesses and teddy bears? Only if those princesses were being eviscerated by Hunter Killers and those teddy...
I Was Working In The Lab, Late One Night

I Was Working In The Lab, Late One Night

When my Patreon reaches $2000/month I’m going to release a new podcast where upon I interview my 7 years old daughter as she reads through the Harry Potter series. It’s called Potter And Daughter and it’s awesomefreakinadorableashell! More details...
I Prefer The Term “Artificial Person” Myself

I Prefer The Term “Artificial Person” Myself

When my Patreon reaches $2000/month I’m going to release a new podcast where upon I interview my 7 years old daughter as she reads through the Harry Potter series. It’s called Potter And Daughter and it’s awesomefreakinadorableashell! More details...
The Rise Of The Machines

The Rise Of The Machines

This really happened to me. No, I am not Ok. I doubt I will ever be OK. I got my wife a Roomba for her birthday. I had no idea those things were so expensive, but I found an amazing deal on a used one, and was able to bring our home one step closer to the Robotopia...
Jaeger Bomb

Jaeger Bomb

Wil and I made you a Sparks McGee T-Shirt!  Confused? Of course you are! Read up on Sparks McGee and his awesome adventures. Guys, please go see Pacific Rim. Let’s cancel this film’s financial apocalypse before it happens. Let’s be the giant robot...
Giant Robits Vs. Water Kongs

Giant Robits Vs. Water Kongs

CRUISE FUNDRAISER: 88/100 prints are sold and it would be great to sell that last few remaining prints before the end of the year. I am also going to leave up the additional prints and print packs for sale until probably February in case you want to get in on that...
The Möbius Explosion

The Möbius Explosion

Wil Wheaton and I got excited and made a thing! Check out our Wesley’s Big Adventure Shirt over at Sharksplode. CONVENTION NEWS: Connecticon is almost right now!!!. Come see me and David and Ryan and Lar and the Explosm quadruplets and much many mores! [I am...
Blasphormers

Blasphormers

My Heart Is A Hate-filled Pineapple T-Shirts are Alive and Pulsating @ Sharksplode!!! NEW HE PODCAST – Episode 83 “Ass Merkins” The soaps were scented in various Autobot flavors. Diesel for Optimus Prime, New Van Smell for Ironhide, Lilac for...
Always Look On The Bright, Blinding Light Side Of Life

Always Look On The Bright, Blinding Light Side Of Life

“The Doctor Is In” shirt based off the “You’re The Last of The Time Lords, Charlie Brown” comic is here! Guys, it is seriously not that bad. We are all up to our eyeballs in freaking skulls here! We’re motherfucking skull-rich! I am...
Culturally Biased

Culturally Biased

Team Edward [James Olmos] Shirts at Topatoco! NEW HE PODCAST [episode 78] IS HERE! Hours of extra podcast are HERE for Vault Subscribers. Check out my good friend Tom Brislin’s video-song cover of Joe Jackson’s “Steppin’ Out.” HE Podcast...
Don’t Fuck This Up, America

Don’t Fuck This Up, America

Alright, America, if this comic doesn’t set things straight once and for all then I’ve lost all hope in you. Do you want me to spell it out? You like Voltron. Obama is Voltron. Vote for Obama. PLEASE, don’t fuck it up this time. Tags: 2008...
The Chronic-What?-cles of Sarah Connor

The Chronic-What?-cles of Sarah Connor

There you go. Josh IS an evil, hate filled robot from the future after all. Despite a slight climb in last week’s ratings, it is highly likely that “Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles” will get thrown into a vat of molten steel, only to give a...
Requiem for a Robocop

Requiem for a Robocop

Comic-Con ’08 Revelations Pt. 3 There’s also a tunnel of light that probably represents a vagina or something. Aronofsky certainly wouldn’t have been the first name that came to mind when someone mentioned “Robocop.” He’s a fine...
No Disassemble Visitation Rights

No Disassemble Visitation Rights

I posted a remark in the previous comic about Johnny 5 walking out on WALL-E and his mom. Almost immediately I wanted to see this SciFi/Lifetime movie play out. So there you go.I imagine it was tough for Jonathan 5 after “Short Circuit 2.” There were...
He’s Very LONEL-E

He’s Very LONEL-E

Spoiler Alert! WALL-E’s a Cylon. I saw the movie last night. Not my favorite Pixar product, but certainly worth the money.  I thought it was odd for Pixar to include video of REAL humans (assuming Fred Willard isn’t a cartoon of some kind) along with the...
Come with me if you want to love

Come with me if you want to love

His CPU is a neural net processor, a learning computer. You honestly have no idea how many times I’ve seen that movie. Let’s just say the number of times was a lot. A lot of times. Google is definitely trying to buy part of the air or the waves or the...
Reasons I Love Teh Internets: Vol 1

Reasons I Love Teh Internets: Vol 1

It is a well documented fact that I love the Internet. You may counter, “Well, if you love it so much, why don’t you marry it?” Two reasons: A) I’m already married, and 2) judging from its proclivity towards pornography one can assume that the...