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The Second Time Around

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TORONTO: I AM COMING FOR YOU! TCAF is this weekend!
I will be at table 222 (with Topatoco) on the 2nd floor Saturday 5/7 and Sunday 5/8. I will have books 1 and 2 (and I will draw dumb things in them for you), stickers, buttons, prints (probably a “The Doctor Is In” print), and maybe a couple of shirts.

The Doctor Is In T-Shirt

“The Doctor Is In” shirt based off the “You’re The Last of The Time Lords, Charlie Brown” comic is here!

Sharksplode.com - Geeky Nerdy T-Shirts, Funny Tee Shirts
I hope you enjoy this very unusual thing my brain (and subsequently my body) did in the wee hours of the night. I started trying to write a comic about how Megan Fox was ejected from Transformers 3: The Wall (presumably for NOT buffing Michael Bay’s Ferrari with her own buttocks slathered in Professor Explosionheimer’s Patented Gluteus Auto-Balm), but I couldn’t see to… care? Yeah, that’s the thing I wan’t able to do.

As it turned out I cared a lot more about 90’s family sitcom character-inconsistencies than the fate of Ms. Fox. I guess I’m really growing up. Speaking of, why did Uncle Jessie change his last name from Cochran to Katsopolis. If he was dodging the INS, that seems like the opposite way to go.

COMMENTERS: If you saw the trailer for Transformers: Tales From The Darkside, feel free to comment on it or offer an alternate subtitle for it, as we once did with the Spider-Man musical. After seeing last week’s Doctor Who, I have a feeling The Doctor had something to do with that spaceship crashing on the moon. You can also remind us of your most nagging sitcom weirdnesses if you like.

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Habeas Jennifer’s Corpus

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Every night Josh cooks 6 pounds of bacon and reads aloud from the NecroOmNomNomicon.

If you get the reference in this comic it must be because you (like me) have seen the trailers for Jennifer’s Body, because apparently no one saw the actual movie. Megan Fox is an attractive young lady, but other than that she’s shit-cocking insane. She’s been dating Brian Austin Green from Terminator: 90210 The High School Years and told Rolling Stone that the reason she will never buy a gun is that she’d definitely shoot him with it. I wonder if he started wearing full Kevlar body armor after that article came out. She also uses gypsy magic to keep airplanes from falling out of the sky. So what I’m saying is that she’s s winner. Not a “thankless, unfriendly bitch” as former coworlkers have said. No sir. She’s a winner through and trough.

On a “things I can actually recommend you checking out” note, two of my webcomicing friends Bill Barnes (of Unshelved) and Paul Southworth (of Ugly Hill and You Are Dead) have activated their webcomic wonder twin powers and created a new comic call Not Invented Here. Programmers and coders should be instantly familiar with the title and thus most of the subject matter. That’s not to say non-programmers won’t get the jokes (but you won’t). Bill is the king of niche webcomics that only make sense to 1 out of every 150,000 people. And Paul is the king of drawing 150,000 times better than Bill. Together they can’t be stopped.

Not Invented Here Comic

That’s enough good will. Here’s an ad for my book. Looks like it will be shipping when I return from Baltimore Comic-Con.

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A Fetish Revealed

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Alternate Title: Sittin’ In The Box O’ The Bay

the-hijinks-ensue-store-e28094-sci-five-t-shirt[reddit-me]Michael Bay traveled to our time from a distant future where man is enslaved by sentient explosions. He also made Megan Fox wash his Ferrari while he filmed it. One can only assume she wasn’t the first actor to get in Bay’s good graces by indulging his is peculiar obsession. Honestly, if the only thing that gets you off is celebrities washing expensive cars there probably isn’t a lot of porn in that genre ready for your enjoyment. I can see why he would take it into his own hands (pun intended) to produce it on his own.

“Like this, Mr. Bay?”

“Yeah, just like that. You’re auditioning for the scene where Cappuccinotron, the Transformer with the stereotypically Italian accent, drives through some mud, then an explosion, then more mud then five more explosions and needs to be washed. Fine Italian transformers can only be washed by hand… in cutoffs…”

SPECIAL THING FOR SERENITY / FIREFLY FANS!!

My friend Mikey is parting with his beloved Serenity Prop Sword and you can totally buy it. It was actually used in the final battle scene between Capt. Mal and The Operative.

Read more and bid HERE.

PS

Sorry for the lack of a comic on Friday. I was in a bit of a creative rut and didn’t want to half ass it.