Hulk: El Hombre Increíble

UPDATE: Or maybe this didn’t happen at all.

In the same week it was announced that former TV Hulk, Lou “The Ferrigs” Ferrigno, was joining Steven “Fat Karate” Seagal in the Arizona Anti-Illegal Immigration Marauder Posse Squad Strike Force Delta, AND that Guillermo “The Most Mexican Director In Hollywood” del Toro would be bringing a new Hulk TV series to ABC.

Keep Your Laws Off My Ovipositor T-ShirtI can put up with a lot of things, but brand disparity among individuals loosely affiliated with the same fictional property is ALWAYS where I draw the line. I guess. Come on, The Incredible Hulk Franchise. Pro-Mexican or Anti-Mexican? Pick a side. We’re at war.

Is it just me, or does this story make it seem like Steven Seagal actually is the character he played in Robert Rodriguez’s Machete? Pro-tip for illegals trying to sneak past Lou Ferrigno at the border: he’s partially deaf. Stay behind him and be very, very quiet. If he catches you in a sleeper hold, it’s lights out.

For those unfamiliar with Eli’s Vespa-riding doppleganger, it is his friend Alex. He last appeared in THIS COMIC taking Eli’s place after Eli asked for too much imaginary comic money.

COMMENTERS: This whole thing just screams, “set up for a reality show.” Name the show, come up with the tagline, and/or give us an episode synopsis. I’ll get you started:

“Bean Counters with Lou Ferrigno and Steven Seagal! We’re taking these illegals back to brown-town!”

Josh Smash!

I’ve spent the last 3 days or so working non stop on “The Vault of Secret Awesome.” At one point today I said, “wait… I actually have to make the comics or there won’t be any comics.” Let me tell you, this job would be easy if it weren’t for all the comics. I could just sit back and collect delicious internet monies. So delicious.

This comic is as close as I can get to talking about “The Incredible Hulk” since I haven’t seen it yet. Granted, that has never stopped me before, but I actually plan to see this one. Eli says it’s pretty good. Regarding Josh’s pigmentation,  I suppose the hyper-gravy-ation turns the skin green. Why not?

In real life Josh has an “in” with a Popeye’s chicken employee that owe’s him a life debt. Much like Angel and his butcher friend, Josh sneaks in the back of the restaurant and Hector loads him up with life giving gravy… and probably some pig’s blood too.

My comment challenge to you: what else might one order off the menu at “Cluck-U-Chicken“?

(Thanks for your patience with the late comics and such while I’m getting the foundation poured for this webcomic empire. Your comments and emails of support are extremely helpful.)