The Neverending Backstory

I made a bunch of shirts and put them on the internet for to you buy. Wil Wheaton helped.

I am not 100% opposed to Han Solo or Boba Fett origin stories, but of the Star Wars EU (novels, video games, comics, etc) has taught us anything, it’s that theirs quite literally AN ENTIRE GALAXY of stories to tell without rehashing old tropes and characters. I’d love to see an original character, set in the Star Wars universe that just has, oh I don’t know, a great story. I feel like the entire purpose of the prequels was to answer questions that no one was really asking. Sure, we wanted to know what exactly turned Vader evil and how he got in the robot suit, but that was about it. One prequel movie (written by ANYONE but George Lucas) could have handled that story expertly and done it as a subplot of a much larger original story. I don’t care to see 20 minutes of how Han and Chewie met or how Han had previous encounters with characters we already know. That’s garbage story telling. Where’s the Kyle Katarn movie? Where’s the KOTOR movie? Disney, let’s move in that direction before we find out how young Boba Fett dealt with the death of his father and eventually bought a defective jetpack from PROBABLY WATTO (you monsters).

Big thanks to my buddy Stepto for inspiring this comic with his tweetings. You should go buy his new comedy album “A Geekster’s Paradise.” That is, if you enjoy laughing. Otherwise go buy a bunch of rocks and jam them into your face or whatever people that don’t enjoy laughing do.

COMMENTERS: What area of the Star Wars universe would you most like to see explored in new stand alone movies? Since it’s going to happen anyway, who would you cast in the young Han Solo movie?

Rival Smugglers

Alternate Title: The Smugglers Brothers

NEW PRINT SIZES IN THE STORE! I might have some prints of this comic with me at SDCC. If you would like a print and you won’t be at SDCC, you can click the “Buy A Print” button beneath the comic [or click HERE] and select from either 8.5×11″ for $15 or 11×17″ for $25. They are printed on SUPER nice matte stock and ready to be framed.

The Fancy Sketch Drive ends TODAY Wednesday 7/11/12! I will be turning it off as soon as I leave for San Diego, around 2pm central time. 

San Diego Comic-Con is right now! I will be hanging out at booth 1332 with Blind Ferret. Check my Twitter for signing times and availability. More info HERE.

Grammar Dalek Shirts will go on presale after I get back from SDCC.

I was going run some of the Fancy Sketch Drive sketches as filler while I was away at SDCC, but at the last minute I got inspired to post a colored and be-backgrounded version of the original art I did for the Edmonton, Alberta chapter of Can’t Stop the Serenity 2012. Apparently the drawing raised over $100 for Equality Now. Pretty shiny.

COMMENTERS: I don’t really think the Star Wars and Firefly universes would crossover well, but I was having a conversation recently that (with a little rule bending) the Avatar and Firefly universes could co-exist. What other sci-fi or fantasy ‘verses would mesh nicely together? I bet Blade Runner takes place 40, maybe 50 years before Fifth Element.

Dallas Comic Con 2012 Fancy Sketches

Dallas Comic Con and I have always been at odds. I resent it for being so close to my home and yet such a poorly organized, terribly mismanaged convention, and it resents me for being alive apparently. Don’t get me wrong, all of the fans I talked to (all half-dozen of them) were quite kind and wonderful. But I spent a day away from my family, paid for a table and sat there for 8 hours for basically no reason. I’m sorry, Dallas. You must have done something VERY wrong, because you don’g get a good con. [I wrote a GIANT post about why this con was an incredible disaster, but I realize it was a bit of downer so I moved it to this TUMBLR post.]

Major thanks to all of you Fancy Bastards that have started donation subscriptions since I added the new $2, $3 and $4 monthly levels. There is a now a premium RSS feed just for subscribers that has the full comic in the feed. You’ll get an email with a link when you sign up. If you have already signed up, you’ll be getting an email this week.

When I told you all that I was rethinking what I was doing with HE, I opened myself up to a lot of criticism. A lot of it was constructive, and a lot of it was painful to take in (because it was true). Still some of it was painful just because a few of you took my self evaluation as an invitation to let me know how badly I’ve been fucking up for the past year or so. Not many of you, but enough. One thing that KEPT cropping up was a deep, all consuming hatred for the photo comics. Many readers told me they were the very reason they stopped caring about the comic in general. A lot of people said they were all in-jokes with my friends and this inaccessible. This is a criticism I can sympathize with despite not really understanding it at all. I always assumed the appeal of the photo-comics WAS that I was bringing you inside. Many of the people I feature in the photo comics are far more famous than I. I never expected writing silly situations for me and famous friends to act out would seem exclusionary.

Now, before you jump to their defense and tell me you LURV the photo comics, rest assured that I have heard from your camp as well. I have determined that these photo comics are the MOST DIVISIVE thing I have ever created. You either ALL THE WAY love them or hate them, but you do not KIND OF anything them. I admit they are a bit self indulgent, and certainly not in line with the regular drawn comics you might be accustomed to here. Since I do enjoy making them, and SOME of you do enjoy reading them, I am working on a way to separate them from the main archive. I am also considering moving the convention sketches along with them. I am thinking you would see regular HE comics on the site when you visit it, and then there would be a sidebar widget they told you if there was a new “Convention” comic or a new “Lo-Fi” comic.

I am definitely doing this with the Lo-Fi’s, so that’s not up for debate. The reason is, if I move them I can actually do them multiple times a week (on the same days as the regular comics even) which was always the plan. I’m just not sure if I should break out the photo comics, the sketches or both into their own area. I am opening the floor to your thoughts on this matter. Please don’t use this as a reason to let me know why you hate the photo comics. I’ve heard enough of that for a lifetime. I just want the site to be as user friendly as possible.

COMMENTERS: Weigh in on this idea if you have something constructive to add. I am going to base my decision largely on your feedback. This site is for you to enjoy, and I don’t want to go breaking it needlessly. If you read my TUMBLR post about Dallas Comic Con, feel free to add your own convention (or other gathering) nightmares. I once went to a ren faire where the sewers backed up and started creating little cesspools here and there throughout the faire grounds. It was very… authentic.


UPDATE: This comic is totally a shirt now!!! 
Han And Chewie “I Know” shirts are live at Sharksplode!

Han And Chewbacca - I Love You / I Know, Han And Chewie Star Wars Parody Funny T-Shirt

Seattle Fancy Bastards! I am coming for you this weekend! Read more HERE

Notice how every other alien’s dialog is subtitled in Star Wars except for Chewie’s? That’s because every word out of his mouth was a declaration of love, and only one person can understand the truth in his heart. He was more than Han Solo’s co-pilot. He was his co-partner. Of course the films DID take place “a long time ago,” so some predjudice is to be expected. Why do you think Chewie didn’t get a medal at the end of A New Hope? Interstellar bigotry, that’s why! Sure, they called themselves “Rebels,” but more than the Empire they are rebelling against love.

Basically Brokeback Mountain is a modern day retelling of Star Wars. Two cowboys (smugglers) hide their true feelings by assuming “normal” lives except for on their long, secluded retreats (deep space runs in the Falcon), and even go as far as to marry women they don’t really love (Leia and Malla) to keep up appearances for fear of reprisal from their community (the Rebels). It really is a tragic story of love, denial and persecution. Also there’s this winy kid who gets his hand cut off. Spoilers.

COMMENTERS: Doesn’t the Star Wars Trilogy make SO MUCH MORE sense now? If you agree with my groundbreaking new understanding of the greatest film love story of all time, feel free to elaborate in the comments. What were the clues? Why was Han really so anxious to get his reward and get back to the Falcon? He wanted to start a nestegg for he and Chewie. Why was he so apprehensive about giving the Falcon to Lando? Because that was the only place he was able to be himself with his partner!