Risque Cryptography

Risque Cryptography

4 NEW PRINTS IN THE HE STORE!  Coffee Is Life, There Are Four Lights, Such Darmok and the remaining (25 or so) signed and numbered Daddy/Daughter Digital Drawing Time Posters have just been added to the HijiNKS ENSUE Store. The regular prints are available in...
First Of All I Wanna Thank My Connect

First Of All I Wanna Thank My Connect

NEW ITEMS: The book sale is going very well, by which I mean you have bought most of the books that I own for about what I paid for them, so I don’t have to burn them. Putting them in the hands of Fancy Bastards as opposed to destroying them is preferable. The...
The Objectification Of My Affection

The Objectification Of My Affection

This biggest difference in the typical straight dude’s celebrity crush and Josh’s is that Josh will likely have sex with this dude before he dies and Kiera Knightly wouldn’t noticed if you jumped on a hundred grenades made of poison dicks to save...
Meat Cute

Meat Cute

I’ve never really dated. I was in 2 long term relationships in high school, then I met my wife when I was 18 and we’ve been together ever since. I’ve only ever had to work up the nerve to romantically introduce myself to 3 people. And while pursuing...
A Good First Impression

A Good First Impression

Concealed weapons laws? In Texas? Sorry, I momentarily forgot about the sign that welcomes you into our great state: “Welcome to Texas. Please help yourself to one of our complimentary assault rifles. Due to new state regulations, you may not enter Texas with...
Yoink

Yoink

A real thing that really happened for real. My self preservation instincts told me to fling the tainted device across the room, but my iPhone preservation instincts superseded them, and I merely placed it back on the table then ran screaming directly into the ocean. I...
The Cleaner

The Cleaner

I had A LOT of fun making this comic for some reason. Perhaps it was sleep deprivation induced euphoria, but the dialog, the inks, everything was just a blast to create. Especially that blanket in panel 2. I am super proud of that blanket. That’s a GOOD blanket...
No Re-Entry

No Re-Entry

At least a dozen of you DEMANDED that I make a shirt based on this comic, SO I DID. I also made you this super cute Adventure Time/Doctor Who shirt. GO BUY IT!  I have 4 or 5 submissions for the Fancy Fan Art Contest. I NEED MORE! “But, Joel! I don’t know...
The Escape Artist

The Escape Artist

At least a dozen of you DEMANDED that I make a shirt based on this comic, SO I DID. I also made you this super cute Adventure Time/Doctor Who shirt. GO BUY IT!  I have 4 or 5 submissions for the Fancy Fan Art Contest. I NEED MORE! “But, Joel! I don’t know...
That’s Why A Bear Can Rest At Ease

That’s Why A Bear Can Rest At Ease

[actually posted on 4/14/14] I’m playing catch up on a week’s worth of comics. Luckily I’ve got three written and I’m banging them out one after another. Just like Josh will be at his Bear Meet Up. Years ago, after Josh have given me a sort of...
Grizzly Mens

Grizzly Mens

[Actually published on 04/10/14] Life has been kicking my ass a bit for the last couple of weeks. A week ago my family and I were huddled in a closet during a tornado warning (which touched down EXTREMELY near my house), then a hail storm smashed both of our cars to...
The Bear And The Maiden Fair

The Bear And The Maiden Fair

[Actually published April 7th] Thank you, Fancy Bastards, for your patience. I’m playing catch up after a week of unexpected distractions. First their was a tornado/hail storm type of situation in my town. Luckily the tornado passed us over (just barely), but...
The Birds And The… Sometimes It’s Just Birds

The Birds And The… Sometimes It’s Just Birds

I LOVE the argument from homophobes that goes something like, “How am I supposed to explain to my children that their teacher is gay?!” Have you tried? It’s super easy. It goes something like, “Sometimes a boy falls in love with a girl and...
Phoenix Comicon 2013 Fancy Sketches Part 2

Phoenix Comicon 2013 Fancy Sketches Part 2

Go to my store. I promise there is something there you will enjoy owning. In turn, I will enjoy owning your money. Hey hey! It’s part 2 in my 2 part series of 2 sets of Fancy Sketches from 1 Phoenix Comicon! This set indirectly stars my friend John Scalzi, who...
Guest Comic By William Tallman Of Reptilis Rex

Guest Comic By William Tallman Of Reptilis Rex

I’m at Emerald City Comicon RIGHT NOW having a motherbuttshaking PARTYPARTYPARTYPARTY!!! If you are in Seattle, come to booth 1106 (the Blind Ferret Booth) and SHAKE DEM HEALTHY BUTTS!  (also buy stuff from me) In my absence you are presently being treated to a...
If I Had Glass

If I Had Glass

I have a bunch of clearance shirts in my store. Please buy them. Josh IRL brought up a good point in this tweet. The possible proliferation of Google Glass won’t lead to people doing a lot more sky diving and hot air balloon racing. It’s going to lead to...
Franky Say Relax

Franky Say Relax

Horribly sad, long story short: The Blind Ferret Server got SUPER hacked and all their sites went down, including my store. Most are still down. Every day the store is down I get closer to not having enough money to pay my bills this month. Therefor I have created a...
Outward Bound

Outward Bound

CRUISE FUNDRAISER UPDATE: 98/100 prints are sold!  Only 2 prints remain! I am expecting delivery of the prints any day now and they’ll start shipping as soon as they arrive. I made a new eBook/iBook! It’s called “Sorry I Ruined Your Book Vol....
SDCC 2012 Fancy Sketches

SDCC 2012 Fancy Sketches

I am still recuperating from SDCC. I will resume drawing Fancy Sketch Drive sketches this week, and start mailing them out as they are finished. There were almost 60 ordered so it’s going to take me a while. I appreciate your patience. I have a guest comic up at...
Booty-Call Accelerator

Booty-Call Accelerator

The Fancy Sketch Drive is on! About 25/100 are already sold. Get in on this and help support me in a time of financial need while getting some sweet original art! I will draw damn near whatever you want (within reason) and I will do it live on Ustream! Donors and...
You Can’t Take This Guy From Me

You Can’t Take This Guy From Me

If you are a Donation Subscriber, you are A) one of my favorite people, and B) going to get an email today with a link to download the first HijiNKS ENSUE iBook/eBook. It’s called iJinks Ensue: Drawing Hands Is Hard, and it contains all of the HE comics from...
This Is A Safe Place

This Is A Safe Place

Sometimes you have let the one’s you love know how their path to self destruction is really inconveniencing you. Other times you have to say, “F-Balls to that!” and go grind your man-bits (Tim Bits if you’re Canadian) right into another...
Know What I’m Saying, Holmes?

Know What I’m Saying, Holmes?

UPDATE 05/18/12: Donation subscribers of any level will get access to an RSS feed with the full comic in it. I am going to be at Dallas Comic Con this weekend with Randy Milholland of Something Positive. I will ONLY BE THERE SATURDAY. Randy will be there Saturday and...
Guest Comic By Brian Patterson Of D20 Monkey

Guest Comic By Brian Patterson Of D20 Monkey

Wil Wheaton and I got excited and made this “Fighting Time Lords” shirt!  Since I am packing and print-making and prepping for C2E2, Brian Patterson was kind enough to provide you with an illustrated funny-time concerning role playing, Time Lords and...
A Lincoln Log Through The Heart

A Lincoln Log Through The Heart

Did you know my books have 1000’s of words (many of them quite funny) that you haven’t read? I don’t just put the comics you’ve already seen on the pages. I write NEW COMMENTARY for each and every comic. There’s also funny character...
Star-Crossed

Star-Crossed

UPDATE: This comic is totally a shirt now!!!  Han And Chewie “I Know” shirts are live at Sharksplode! Seattle Fancy Bastards! I am coming for you this weekend! Read more HERE.  Notice how every other alien’s dialog is subtitled in Star Wars except...
Consecration

Consecration

NEW SHIRT!!! There are a lot of misconceptions about THE PENTAPPLEGRAM. Did you know ancient druids used it to ward off kernel panics as well as for human sacrifice? Josh has his new “The New iPad” for mere moments before he discovered that it was capable...
What’s In The Box?!

What’s In The Box?!

UPDATE! Check out this new shirt I made: THE PENTAPPLEGRAM! There will probably be stickers as well in the future. Many of us more technologically inclined individuals have certain habbitual behaviors concerning the delivery, unboxing, first use and subsequent...
We Are The 5%

We Are The 5%

NEWT FOR PRESIDENT!!! GET AWAY FROM HER, YOU BITCH!!! Josh IRL actually got a stern warning from AT&T that his “unlimited” data usage was approaching it’s lim… utmost boundary. I find this kind of shit infuriating. The trend among data...
Feliz Año Nuevo!

Feliz Año Nuevo!

Buy my book. Buy my book. BUY MY BOOK! Theoretically, when someone opens an eventual 4th HijiNKS ENSUE Book THIS will be the first comic they see. Seems like the perfect way to scare off the normals.  I spent New Years Eve (eve) with Eli, Josh and a slew of other...
How It’s Laid

How It’s Laid

OMG FOR THE LOVE OF KRAMPUS, CAN WE PLEASE MAKE #howitslaid A THING?! PLEASE?! It’s all I want for Christmas.  Earlier this week I was live tweeting an episode of How It’s Made where, from the sounds of it, they were either hand-crafting horse saddles or...
Behind Enemy Lines

Behind Enemy Lines

Fighting Time Lords hoodies are at Sharksplode right now! Wibbly Wobbly Hoodie Warmy!  I was a guest on Earwolf’s The Wolf Den Podcast. We talk about the beginnings of HE, The Experiment and making a living doing the thing you love doing. I had a fun time, and I...
The iLluminati

The iLluminati

THE HIJINKS ENSUE STORE IS A PLACE WHERE YOU CAN BUY STUFF!!! OMG you guys, Apple totally wants to go steady with Tim Cook! Brenda told Gina and Gina told Stephanie H. that after study hall, Apple is going to give Tim Cook a million shares of their company valued at...
The Mystery Box

The Mystery Box

Wil Wheaton and I got excited and made a thing! Check out our University of Gallifrey Fighting Time Lords Shirt over at Sharksplode. BIG NEWS! The HijiNKS ENSUE Store will be shutting down for a few weeks so I can make some big, exciting changes. [READ MORE HERE] If...
With Fans Like These…

With Fans Like These…

“The Doctor Is In” shirt based off the “You’re The Last of The Time Lords, Charlie Brown” comic is here! NEW HE PODCAST – Episode 83 “Ass Merkins” UPDATE 4/28/11: Some of you are upset that I’ve taken this...
The Boy Who Landscaped

The Boy Who Landscaped

“The Doctor Is In” shirt based off the “You’re The Last of The Time Lords, Charlie Brown” comic is here! Alternate Title: Peaches and Herbology Then, right as Neville lifts the Sword of Gryffindor above his head, his parents appear to him...
Guest Comic By Ryan Young: Lightraver

Guest Comic By Ryan Young: Lightraver

AND MY AXE! MEEEEDLY MEEEEEDLY SQUEEEEEEEEE!!!!! ALL NEW REDESIGNED “AND MY AXE” SHIRTS ARE IN THE STORE! NEW HE Podcast Episode 80: Medium Seabiscuit [or is it Sexbiscuit?] OMG EMERALD CITY COMICON IS THIS WEEKEND!!! It is by far my favorite show of the...
Paralleloquels

Paralleloquels

There is a new HE Podcast. Download episode 77! You can still order Ultimate Fancy Editions of HE Book 2 AND get your name in the book until I tell you otherwise. Could be a few more days, or longer. Not Sure Yet. Feel free to use the new term I’ve invented,...
It’s Time To Light The Lights

It’s Time To Light The Lights

Get your HijiNKS ENSUE Book 2 Preoder on! GO HERE NOW! Over 1/4 of the Ultimate Fancy Editions are already gone! TEXAS FANCY BASTARDS: Come to Dragon’s Lair Webcomic Rampage in Austin this weekend and hang out with me, David, Danielle, Randy, Jeph, Bill, and...
The Pilgrim’s Progress

The Pilgrim’s Progress

This comic has essentially nothing to do with Scott Pilgrim vs. The World but I’ve been wanting to draw Josh’s “Rogue’s Gallery of Exes” for a while now. So there you go. If you are wondering where “Goldie Locks” is, I know...
…And Leave A Beautiful Corpse

…And Leave A Beautiful Corpse

A NEW PODCAST SAY WHAAAAT?! I am doing a new mini-podcast called the LoFijiNKS Podcast where I just talk for 30 min or so about whatever was on TV or anything else I feel like sharing. I hope to do it a few times a week. You can listen HERE, subscribe HERE, or iTunes...
Jazz Fangs

Jazz Fangs

What can we expect from a Whedon-directed episode of Glee? Dark Willow and Andrew the uber-nerd signing a mashup of Beyonce’s “Single Ladies” and Positive K’s “I Got A Man”? A medley from “The Music Man” performed by...
To Obscenity And Beyond

To Obscenity And Beyond

This comic reminds me of the time Josh IRL showed up to my wife’s college graduation party wearing a Penny Arcade “Jesus is F’ing Metal” shirt. This particular party featured all of her aunts, uncles, grandmas, grandpas and great grandpeople. I...
The Glee Agenda

The Glee Agenda

Echoing the real Josh’s Twitter sentiments: I am totally gay for Glee. In fact, I’ve been quite gay for it since Fox premiered the pilot on Hulu almost 4 months ago. The musical element of the show gives it its voice, but thankfully it’s used...
Extinction Level Event

Extinction Level Event

After Monday’s near miss, it’s only a matter of time before we are gently nudged into oblivion by an asteroid. Despite what the movies tell you, no amount of Bruce Willis or President Morgan Freeman can save us. The last one missed us by 41,000 miles....
The Return of Gaytos

The Return of Gaytos

Do a Google Image search for “Kratos“ and see how long it takes for you to see Josh. Not the “comic Josh” but the ACTUAL HUMAN JOSH in full Kratos regalia. Assuming the Google gods are still smiling upon me, he will be in the first 5 results....
Well, It’s Groundhog Day… Again…

Well, It’s Groundhog Day… Again…

During the “magical date” Josh, carved a giant penis out of a block of ice with a chainsaw. The townsfolk  of Punxsutawney thought it was very romantic. Later they went to  Gobbler’s Knob. It seemed appropriate. “Groundhog Day” is in my...
Recommended For Ages Youngling to Padawan

Recommended For Ages Youngling to Padawan

That actually was my name in KOTOR. Call me a heretic but I didn’t enjoy it. Turn based combat just doesn’t make any sense to me. The story was enthralling (certainly better than the prequels) but the game play fell flat for me. Two toys debuted at CES...