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You Are Here…ish

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I guess they should have stuck with iOS 5th edition. BANG! ZOOM! ETC! And thus I have exhausted my knowledge of Dungeons and/ or Dragons. Wait, one more. Maybe they should have stuck with the GPS… GRAPH PAPER SYST[bursts into flames, explodes forever]

Big thanks to my pal, Joseph Scrimshaw, for inspiring this comic with a tweet. Speaking of ScrimTweets, once on a boat Joseph made me laugh so hard the boat sank.

I am an Apple fanboy, but not an Apple apologist. When they screw up, I am the first to admit it. With their new Google Maps replacement app, Apple certainly screwed the pooch, humped the pumpkin and hosed the Brony in the grandest fashion. I was really looking forward to a turn by turn directions situation that let me yell my desired destination at Siri, but the press has been so bad and the user reactions so negative that I haven’t even opened the Maps app, yet.

For now I am sticking with the Google Maps web App for every day map-looking-both-up-and-at and Navigon for in-car GPS. Navigon is really a fantastic app and the price has been cut by over 50% since it was first offered. If you need a true GPS unit replacement app, you can’t really go wrong for $40. I especially love how they let you download only the states you plan to drive in so you don’t have to keep gb’s of map data on your phone. The interface is easy to read, the voice synth is clear (and often humorous with pronunciations), the maps are up to date and it works offline/sans cell data connection. It has saved my ass at least a dozen times.

COMMENTERS: Give me your GPS, Google Maps, Apple Maps related horror stories. Was the map the cause or the cure of your strife? The first year I went to San Diego Comicon, I stayed in an extended stay motel about 35 minutes away. One night I took a cab back to the motel. About 5 minutes in I told the driver I thought she was going the wrong way. She assured me all was well and she had been there before. 15 minutes in I said, “I’ve never seen any of this before. Are you sure?” Again, she was positive we were A-OK. I pulled out my phone and plotted the Convention Center, the motel and our current location, a tiny blue dot moving increasingly further and further away from and in the opposite direction of the red dot that represented my air mattress and suitcases. She stared at it a bit then finally agreed to turn around. I agreed (without really opening it up for debate) that I would not be paying for all of the time and miles in which she drove me wherever the hell she thought I wanted to go.

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Guest Comic By Brian Patterson of D20 Monkey

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AND MY AXE!
MEEEEDLY MEEEEEDLY SQUEEEEEEEEE!!!!!

ALL NEW REDESIGNED “AND MY AXE” SHIRTS ARE IN THE STORE!

And My Axe - Gimli shirt by HijiNKS ENSUE at Topatoco

NEW HE Podcast Episode 80: Medium Seabiscuit [or is it Sexbiscuit?]

HijiNKS ENSUE at Emerald City Comicon

OMG EMERALD CITY COMICON IS THIS WEEKEND!!! It is by far my favorite show of the year. Come see me and Angela at booth 307. Here’s a MAP to all the other webcomics I know that will be there. I will be at the Marian Call show in Seattle Thursday night. If any Fancy Bastards are in the audience, feel free to comic up and say hi.

CONVENTION UPDATE: I announced on Twitter today that I wouldn’t be attending the Toronto Comics and Arts Festival [TCAF] due to astronomical airfares. Lots of you suggested I flying into Buffalo, NY and drive from there. This might be a viable possibility, so I’m not counting Toronto out 100% yet. I will make an update via Twitter when my plans are finalized.

BOOK UPDATE: The giant, frost bitten pallet of HE Book 2’s should arrive at my house from Canada today. I’ll be on a plane to Seattle the next morning and start shipping books when I get back. Non-artist edition books will ship first, followed by non-artist UFE’s (still waiting on some of the goodies like stickers and buttons to arrive), followed by all artist editions. I have at least 200 books to sketch, so please be forgiving when it comes to delivery times.

HOW ABOUT THIS FANCY GUEST COMIC, HUH? Very special thanks to Brian Patterson of D20 Monkey for this hilarious guest comic. Though the three of us have never played D&D together in real life, I assume it would go very much like this.

COMMENTERS: What else goes on in the mundane lives of Orcs and other dungeon dwellers BEFORE you party happens upon them?

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Wheaton Comic Dare: Who’s On Middle Earth?

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CHECK OUT MY GUEST COMIC OVER AT SOMETHING*POSTITIVE!!!
And Dumbing Of Age by my friend David Willis starts TODAY!

Occasionally Wil Wheaton will dare me to turn a random Tweet into a full fledged comic. Not one to back down from a challenge (nobody… calls me chicken), I have once again obliged.

A little context from the man himself:

Aeofel Elhromanë, [is] the Eladrin Avenger I played for the most recent Penny Arcade D&D podcast. [link to post]

In describing his character, Wil said:

Aeofel is an Isolating Avenger. He is, in normal language, a zealot. Where a Paladin brings comfort to the afflicted, the Avenger brings great vengeance and furious anger to those who caused the affliction.

And in a particular bout of furious anger he fell into a pit of acid and died forever. Wil’s followers have madeAeofel Lives! one of their many battle cries (along with “Don’t Be A Dick” and “I feel strange but also good”). One intrepid PAX goer went as far as to make an “Aeofel Lives” t-shirt. In response I Tweeted (or Twat) THIS at which point Wheaton threw down the gauntlet.

This was one of those comics that I just had to get out of my system before the idea overtook all of my higher brain functions. So if you find it overly specific or unenjoyable, please understand that me having inside jokes with Wil Wheaton is basically the reason I started this comic and just indulge me. There will be a new comic about a movie or something (probably Machete) on Monday.