Morbidity And Mentality


Playing with a new art style today. Hope you enjoy it.

HEY SHIRT WANTERS: I’ll be posting holiday shipping deadlines over at my store soon. If you want something before, let’s say, around the last week of December, you should probably order it now.

Want to help me bring back the HijiNKS ENSUE Podcast?! Or at least a NEW PODCAST called HijiNKS ENSUE?!  Then my Patreon is THE PLACE for you. My next goal is to relaunch my podcast and updated weekly. Go on and help out if you can. Thanks!




Missing Mom


I’ve been making alternate versions of my recent comics with NEW JOKES and posting them exclusively for my Patreon Patrons. TODAY, AND TODAY ONLY, EVERYONE GETS TO SEE 5 DIFFERENT VERSION OF TODAY’S COMIC!!!!

Screen Shot 2015-09-28 at 6.40.31 AM

I’ve posted them HERE on my Patreon FREE FOR EVERYONE!

Dearest Sharksploders, please help me get my Patreon over the $2000 hump. Comics is my full time job, but it doesn’t currently pay full time money. Every little bit helps and is QUITE appreciated.




FARGOne Conclusion





Become a Patron now and you can help
me release more eBooks of my comics and
sketches, bonus monthly Patron-Only comics,
an album of cover songs, a LOST EPISODE OF
, and MORE!

Check out my Patreon HERE.


Here’s another redrawn/recolored FANEURYSM comic, newly reborn as a SHARKSPLODE comic. Bask in its unholy tranformation! You can see the original here, and read the blog post I wrote back in March 2014 below. Fargo season 2 is about to start, so now’s a good time to shotgun season 1.

The Fargo TV series is really good. Like REALLY good, dontchaknow. My wife and I started shotgunning it via VOD based on numerous accounts of it being of high quality and damn, if it didn’t grab me right away. At first I was confused, thinking that it was a retelling of the original Coen brothers movie. A lot of the characters and many of the situations seemed to be analogous to the those in the 1996 film. Also, they both started with an onscreen message about being based on a true story. So was it the same true story, or two very similar true stories that happened nearly 20 years apart? Was Martin Freeman’s character supposed to be the TV version of William H. Macey’s character? They both had dead end jobs and got involved with criminals before quickly getting in way over their heads.

So, what was the deal? It turns out the answers to my questions were basically, “Yessss? But also noooo?” Fargo, the movie, is NOT based on a true story. There are a few true crime stories that might have been inspiration, but one of them took place in Connecticut, and neither of them are similar enough to the film to call it “true.” That was just a lie the film makers used when marketing the movie to a world that didn’t yet have immediate access to all recorded facts in their pockets. Bullshitting was easier in the 90’s. Likewise, the FX show is also NOT a true story. It’s a great story, but a false one none the less. After a few episodes you actually learn that Fargo the show is a direct sequel to Fargo the movie in that they take place in the same universe, and at least one plot point carries over directly from one to the next. It is ALSO a bit of a remake/retelling in that many of the characters and situations are TV-ised versions of their movie counterparts. It’s a bit confusing when you analyze it, but it’s also great TV. And I should point out that knowledge of the movie is in no way necessary to enjoy the show.

Now go have some hotdish, hon, and enjoy the nice, gruesome murders on the TV.

Look at these Harry Potter Owl Post Earrings, Doctor Who Dalek Earrings and Star Wars Lightsaber Earrings my wife made!

Sharksplode Harry Potter Earrings Dalek Earrings Lightsaber Star Wars Earrings


Look at them with your eyes, buy them with your hands and jam them into your ears!


Every Phone Call With Your Mom


I have completely retooled my Patreon rewards and goals!
Become a Patron now and you can help me release more eBooks of my comics and sketches, bonus monthly Patron-Only comics, an album of cover songs, a LOST EPISODE OF THE HIJINKS ENSUE PODCAST, and MORE! Read the details HERE or just check out my Patreon HERE.

This comic is only SLIGHTLY embellished from completely true events that may or may not have happened, but almost entirely and certainly DID happen to me. If Facebook is the place you go to find out what your friends’ wives’ coworkers think of politics, Mom’s phone calls are where you go to find out who, among the people you don’t know, is now dead.

I think this would be funnier if your parents had dementia and were also comic book fans. Then they’d call you to let you know that the nice billionaire bachelor up on the hill has lost yet another ward under mysterious circumstances. Your mom just hopes he settles down and finds a nice woman. Your mom doesn’t know that he is already in a committed relationship… WITH VENGEANCE


The thing in the alt-text is a true thing that was a part


200 Years Of Parenting


Look at these t-shirts I made for you! Look at them, then complete the necessary steps to own them!

HijiNKS ENSUE Store t-shirts

Sometimes, as a parent, you have to put your foot down. You have to show a little tough love. Sometimes this means seeing your child’s laptop only has 5% battery left, but you don’t plug it in. You LET it die, because you know you told your kid to plug it in when it was below 10% and they didn’t. You LET them experience an entire 8 minute car ride to the grocery store without a full screen, digital entertainment experience. You bite your lip, and power through the tears. You hold your ground and you stand firm. You FORCE them to make do with their tablet, their phone, their smart watch, their 3DS and, in case theirs dies, your phone and also your iPad and probably your Kindle Fire and maybe just bring your laptop in case the other stuff doesn’t cut it.

Hey, Honda, Chevy and whoever else is listening: You wanna make a car that absolutely EVERY SINGLE PARENT in America will buy? Regardless of the size, fuel economy or price, just make it so up to five kids can play Minecraft simultaneously in the back seats. Put in the headrests or the consoles or where the airbags used to be. I mean, something has to go to make room for all the Minecraft hardware. Don’t even bother naming it. Call it “The Car Where All The Kids Can Play Minecraft While They’re In The Car.” Don’t even show a picture of it in the ads. Just a black screen with those words. Don’t even paint it. Use those stick on letters to write “Minecraft Car” on the windshield. Other parents will crane their necks and “ooh” and “ahh” like it was a god damn Tesla. Have a second 40 gallon fuel tank that JUST powers the Minecraft server’s battery. Make it ONLY run off a mixture of premium unleaded, and in-season avocados. NO ONE WILL CARE. Stuff the seats with scorpions and replace the steering wheel with a length of loose chain. You’ll sell a MILLION of them.

Call me. We’ll talk numbers.