HijiNKS ENSUE At Fan Expo Canada (Toronto)!!!

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Your eyes and your literacy do not deceive you! I will be at Fan Expo Canada in Toronto this weekend with Blind Ferret and Randy Milholland of of Something*Positive. I will be at booth #844 and I will have t-shirts, books, sketches, prints, Lil’ Wil plushies and… THE MYSTERY BOXXXXX!!!

Come by and buy stuff or say hi, or ‘eh or aboot or CTHULHU FHTAGAN or whatever you Torontoonians say. Remember (always remember and NEVER forget) that you have the option (NAY, THE RESPONSIBILITY!) to bring me tribute in the form of exotic boozes, confectionary treats, Starbucks Doubleshots (the ones in the tiny cans), or actual Starbucks Iced Soy Lattes in exchange for my favor. My favor may take the form of a free sketch, a handshake, a confused and confusing scowl or a series of fierce blows to the head and knees and maybe the ear canals.

UPDATE: OH CRAPSPASM I JUST REMEMBERED THE KOREAN BBQ PLACE IN TORONTO THAT SERVES UNLIMITED MEATS FOR LIKE $8 OK NOW I’M SUPER EXCITED!!!

ANOTHER THING! 

Check out these Tetris earrings my wife made! 

Tetris Earings!

 

Comments (14)

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EvilJorge's avatar

EvilJorge · 95 weeks ago

I want a t-shirt or print of that picture, damnit.

1 reply · active 95 weeks ago

Are you going to the con?
Larry's avatar

Larry · 95 weeks ago

Tell me more about this Korean BBQ place, please! I’m going to be in Toronto the week after this con.

I’ll also suggest that, last time I was there, there were a bunch of decent and cheap sushi places on Eglinton between Yonge and Mt. Pleasant. Also, I suggest you try the amazing Jewish delicacy known as Smoked Meat. Caplansky’s near U of T and Centre Street Deli up in the burbs are both amazing, and different enough that it’s worth going to both if you want.

2 replies · active 95 weeks ago

http://www.koreangrillhouse.com/

It’s amazing. They just keep bringing you raw meat and you cook it in your table and it’s AMAZING. The more the cook the dirtier the grill gets with meat drippings so the longer you’re their cooking, the better the food tastes.

Larry's avatar

Larry · 95 weeks ago

Thanks! I do love Korean BBQ. There’s one in Philly where the little old lady who brings the bulbogi et al to your table doesn’t really trust you to get it right unless you are asian, female, and over 50.
HeyZeusKreesto's avatar

HeyZeusKreesto · 95 weeks ago

I feel kind of cheated with this comic. A week or so with no new comic, and this new one is basically an advertisement for something else I can’t afford. 🙁 But I know this is not just a hobby for you, so you do what you gotta do. Also, I was thinking of buying a drawing from you if it’s still available when I get paid Friday. Is a zombie panda eating the HE crew too complicated?

2 replies · active 95 weeks ago

HeyZeusKreesto's avatar

HeyZeusKreesto · 95 weeks ago

Sorry, no edit button. To add to the end of my other post, I’ll most likely be including an extra $10 donation if that matters at all.
Trying not to be too insulted by your initial comment, but if you feel you aren’t getting what you deserve from this situation then perhaps you should seek free entertainment elsewhere. If you want to buy a sketch that’s cool, but 4 characters will require more than a $10 donation. The guidelines are posted on the sketch drive page.
I am SOOO looking forward to meeting you at Fan Expo this year! I missed you laster year as I was at the Star Wars Celebration Convention. My friend bought me your second book and i’ve been hooked ever since.

1 reply · active 95 weeks ago

That’s great! Im glad you enjoyed the book.
They’re made to order so they’ll be available when you’re ready. Thanks!

 

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The Loophole

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That title should actually be, “The Loouphoule.” 

TOP SECRET INFO: You can get a print of any HE comic ever by clicking “Buy A Print” under the comic, or by going here.

Did you know if you catch a real live Canadian they have to show you their Indentattoo which, in turn, reveals their true name and spirit animal? Once you can call a Candian by its true name, it must obey your every command. Unless you command it to commit murder, or be rude in public. Then IT CONTROLS YOU! The good news is, it will often express mild irritation at your capture and enslavement of it, but ultimately wish you well and attempt to find its way home. Canadians can always sense true north because of a naturally occurring magnet found in their skulls. Up until the late 1800’s, these “bone magnets” were highly sought after by American hunters, trappers, golfers and tennis players for their perceived effectiveness in pseudo-science carpal tunnel bracelets.

I am quite literally bursting with true facts about Canada. I’ve been there at least 3 times, which makes me an expert. I’m going back again next month for Calgary Expo and to get recertified as an official Canada Expert First Class. I’ll be at booth 925/1025 with Blind Ferret.

One more comic and this story bit ends. Game Of Thrones comes back this Sunday, and I’m struggling to remember who is dead, who is currently actively being killed and who is merely mortally wounded. I need to make a chart. A blood chart. My wife has read ahead in the books which has transformed her into some kind of fire witch with the curse of foresight. She isn’t to be trusted.

I need to go write a foreword for my friend’s book.

COMMENTERS: Have you ever been catching up on a popular tv or movie series while your spouse, significant other, friend, etc. has already read all the books? Did it augment the experience for you, or were they all, “OH MAN OH MAN OH MAN YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT’S ABOUT TO HAPPEN OMGOMGOMG!!!” all the time? I made the ENORMOUS mistake of assuming I would never care about Harry Potter, so I forced my old boss to explain the entire plot to me, including who killed Dumbledore and that Harry was the final Horcrux, thus robbing me of the excitement of finding those things out for myself when I eventually fell in love with the series.

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Toronto Fan Expo 2012 Fancy Sketches

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HijiNKS ENSUE At Dallas Animefest

This weekend I’ll be at Dallas Animefest with Rob from Explosm. We’ll be in the dealer room, terrified of glomping cat-girls and Sailor Bubbas alike. I’ll have both HE Books, Prints, sketch cards, “Grammar Dalek” Shirts and “The Doctor Is In” shirts.

This was my first Toronto Fan Expo, but my second time in Toronto. Once again, I found the city and it’s comic-loving citizens to be as kind as pleasant as the Canadian Constitution requires them to be under penalty of mild reprimand. I only had one goal for my weekend in Toronto, which was to dine once again at Korean Grill House. This is a restaurant where you are given a table that is on fire, tray after tray of raw meat, some tongs and ZERO instructions, guidance or supervision of any sort. It’s $10 all you can (m)eat, and I’m pretty sure it’s my favorite place in the world. I wondered if I was hyping it up to my friends too much, but after seeing them marvel at the quantity and quality of meats, the looks of childlike wonder at the thought of throwing said meats into a flaming grill that was built into the table, and their amazement as we elected to reward ourselves for consuming our own weights in meat with celebratory milkshakes, I knew that I was significantly UNDERhyping the fantastical nature of this (m)eatery. If you are visiting Toronto, there is a KGH on Bloor and another on Queens. The service is terrible, the staff is incredibly uninterested in bringing you more lukewarm soda, and the bathroom was unusable, so please take all of that into consideration when I STILL DEMAND that it is my favorite place to eat.

I left the con a day early so I could get home in time to accompany my daughter to her first day of kindergarten. Delta lied to me and told me even though my flight from Buffalo to NYC was late I would definitely still make my connection to DFW. I was still on the first plane when my connecting flight home took off. Even if every plane had been on time, the flights were scheduled 27 minutes apart. Given the 15-20 minutes it takes to de-board the first plane, the time it would take to get to the other terminal (which was a “bus ride” away according to my flight attendent) and the time to board the following flight there was essentially no way possible for this connection to be made. Delta sold me an impossible flight, lied to me about my chances of making it home, then when presented with a plane load of passengers that missed their connections the Delta agents elected to offer us NOTHING as compensation. No flights into TX (for me at least), no flights on other airlines that might have gotten us to our destinations, no hotel and no travel vouchers.

The dead-eyed, policy spewing assfaces I spoke to (Shout outs to Kentun and Chris the PO at Delta in LaGuardia!) made it clear that if I had been the only one affected I would have been taken care of, but since their error screwed 10-15 people NO ONE would be given any sort of consideration. “What would you have me do? Give ALL THESE PEOPLE a hotel?” Oh, the people your company lied to, bilked and stranded hundreds if not thousands of miles from home? Yes, I would. That would be doing the right thing. Delta had an opportunity to make me a customer for life that night. Instead they made me miss my little girl’s first day of school, lose hundreds of dollars by skipping a day of the convention for no reason, and through their arrogance and lack of compassion they lost a customer (who spends nearly $5000 a year on air travel) FOREVER.

COMMENTERS: Please feel free to share your stories about Toronto, Fan Expo, Korean BBQ, or air trave nightmares.  

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Calgary Expo 2012 Fancy Photo Comic Part 3

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Calgary is a weird town. Everything is pretty nice and clean and Canadian and there is a series of above ground tubes that you can navigate most of downtown with to avoid actually being on the street, but pretty much everything closes at sundown and NOTHING is open on Sunday. Visting cartoonists need to drink on Sunday too, Calgary! I don’t think Canadian Jesus will mind. Incidentally, Canadian Jesus is the same as American Jesus (the one true Jesus) except he does some occasional ice fishing and pays too much for his mobile data plan.

The Holodeck is for porn! The Holodeck is for porn! 

The Holodeck Is For Porn T-Shirt, funny star trek parody shirt

If you are a long time reader of HijiNKS ENSUE, you probably know what Star Trek: TNG means to me. It was more than a show. It was a friend and a guide when I was a confused, ignored and bullied little boy. I learned so much about respect (how to earn and give it), problem solving, avoiding violence at all costs, but still not letting anyone push me around, and what the future can (and should) be if we aren’t too childish, greedy and stupid to get ourselves there. I very large part of who I am, and how I view the world is based on the lessons I learned from TNG. So, with that in mind, I’m sure you can gauge how much it meant to me to be present at the 25th Anniversary reunion of the TNG cast at the Calgary Expo. It was nothing short of magical.

As the cast members recollected and joked with each other, I quickly realized that they were not performing; not putting on a show, but instead they were just catching up. It was as if 8000 grinning geeks were not in the room with them as they told stories, and reminisced. We were scores and scores of flies on the wall to the greatest geek conversation we could have hoped to hear. That is not to say they ignored the audience or seemed in anyway ungrateful for our contribution to their legacy (quite the contrary, actually). It’s just that they almost seemed lost in their affection for each other. Patrick Stewart in particular spent most of the evening facing not the audience, but turned to face his friends. If asked a question directly, he always had to look for the mic and pick it up because he had long since put it down in order to pay closer attention to what Frakes, Wheaton or Sirtis were saying. It seemed like the whole thing was sponsored and film by Space in Canada, so I am hopeful that the discussion will be broadcast in some fashion soon. I cannot stress enough how perfect a cap that evening was to 25 years (20 for me) of Star Trek: TNG fandom. I must thank Sohmer and our Calgary Expo volunteers for getting me the ticket. It’s one of those things that I wasn’t going to let myself splurge on, but knowing now what I would have missed… let’s just say I would have regretted it.

Speaking of splurging, when I saw that an entire cast photo with the TNG crew was available for $500 and up to six people were allowed to split the cost, I immediately grabbed five friends and got ready to do some convincing. Turns out this is a proposition that, among Star Trek fans, requires little to no convincing. Thanks again to our fantastic volunteers, we were able to score some line-skipping passes which meant we only had to wait for about an hour instead of three to four. Now I normally am not one for photo-ops or impersonal signings at events where celebrities are present. I much prefer a casual encounter, a brief exchange or words, etc. But this was potentially the last time these people were going to be in the same room… forever! I was already mentally clearing family photos off the mantle to make room for this picture. The photo-op itself took all of 15 seconds. Honestly it wasn’t even enough time to make eye contact with the whole crew. We were in, somehow I ended up next to the Captain (in Troi’s spot), they snapped the pic and we were out. As we left I heard Wil say, “Everyone wave to my friend Joel!” That was, uhh… pretty fucking rad. And as you can see, the picture turned out amazing! Look at that grin on Patrick Stewart! I’m going to have it tattooed over my own face so I can see it every time I look in the mirror. Damn, that was a good day.

COMMENTERS: What events go on your “life flashing before my eyes” hit list? What awesome things have happened to you that made you say “I WAS THERE! I ACTUALLY DID THAT!“?

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Calgary Expo 2012 Fancy Photo Comic Part 2

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Guys, I fully understand that we ARE going to be destroyed by a terror from beyond the stars. I’m OK with that. All I ask is that our destroyer be a cutey-wooty snuggley button of doom. I feel like it’s a reasonable request.

Wil Wheaton and I got excited and made this “Fighting Time Lords” shirt for you!

Gallifrey University Fighting Time Lords Shirt - Doctor Who parody, geeky tees, funny t-shirts,  nerdy shirts

These furthering adventures from Calgary Expo feature The Blind Ferret crew, specifically the be-balded, be-capped, be-lightsabered and ever be-Red Bulled Mr. Sohmer.  Exhibiting with these guys is exactly as much fun as it appears to be. Take that… however you will. One of these days you will probably get to see some of our adventures in full motion complete with audio and additional motion and probably some editing, since Will has been filming us since Emerald City ComiCon. I don’t know when or how the show/documentary/series/??? is going to be released, but from what I’ve seen so far I am in it. So that should be enough, right? I hear the pilot is coming along nicely and I’m sure they will make an official announcement when it’s ready for public consumption.

COMMENTERS: What’s the best geeky baby/kid costume you’ve ever seen? Ever make one for your own kids, or had one made for you as a kid? My wife and I have made our daughter’s Halloween costumes almost every year and our Boo costume is still one of the top Google results when searched.