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The Best Shammy-Man In Hill Valley

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Preorder HijiNKS ENSUE Book 2!!!BOOK 2 DEADLINE UPDATE!

The deadline for ordering the Ultimate Fancy Edition AND getting your name in the book on the Fancy Wall of Fancy Fame is January 15th!!!

Less than half of the 150 UFE’s remain! Show your support for HE and preorder the shit out of Book 2!

I don’t find it at all surprising that Lorraine Baines Mcfly would have buily a mental blockade around most of the events in Back To The Future. Her young life was a series of traumas the likes of which would lead any sane person down the path of drugs and sexual deviance.

When she was a teenager she was harassed daily by a deranged lunatic who was both physically and mentally abusive. Upon hitting a transient with his car, her father invited the total stranger (whom he believed to be a sailor) into his home and even into his daughter’s bed. She immediately attempted to seduce this unidentified stranger, thrusting her (often inebriated) self at him at every chance. The man she eventually married was the same person that only days before their fateful date and the Enchantment Under The Sea Dance, had been shimmying up her tree to watch her undress through binoculars while he masturbated. This is not a mentally stable young woman with healthy relationships and positive role models. Why do you think her brother ended up in jail?

And then, as an adult, her husband (the fetishistic voyeur public masturbator) invites the man that basically tortured her throughout her youth to come work at their home. I’m sure the mere site of him was enough to trigger a psychotic break. Shortly after the events of Back To The Future, Lorraine was certainly committed to a mental institution where she lived out her remaining years strapped to a table singing “The Power Of Love” by Huey Lewis to herself. When we see her visiting Marty and her grandchildren in the sequel, she is obviously on some sort of visitation furlough and higher than a flying DeLorean. “Where we’re going, we don’t need roads. Just pills. PILLS! PILLS! PILLS! THAT’S THE POWER OFFFF LOOOOVVEEE!”