Harry Potter: Epilogue

If you think the weekly Pickle Parties are fantastic, you should see the annual Sausage Fest. It’s a hoot. I would go as far as to say a hoot and a half.

Josh isn’t alone. Many “young wizard enthusiasts” have expressed to me a sense of gloom and uncertainty at the prospect of a Potterless tomorrow. Renewed hope for this sorry lot may lie in the purported forthcoming Encyclopedia Potterotica. J.K. Rowling recently hinted at the possibility of some sort of dark codex of all things witchcraft and wizardry.

Honestly, if you are just seeking new Harry Potter content, look no further than your nearest internet. Fans have literally gagged the internet on original works of fiction and art. Such beautiful art. Arty art…. Ok, it’s mostly Harry sticking it sideways to Ron, Draco, Hagrid or some combination of the three, but if you burn for magical adolescent exploration and adventure it’s out there. That’s all I’m saying.

Regarding the comic: They say every time a fanboy takes a hatchet to the skull, an Angel gets its wings. Your welcome, Clarence. It truly is a wonderful life.

And The Deathly Spoilers

Hermione dies.

Ron dies.

Cedric dies again.

They all die virgins. Its a terrible ordeal, really. I’ve saved you the trouble of reading it.

Josh camped out for “Book 7” (thats secret wizard code for, “I’m not reading a children’s book”) like it was some sort of internet telephone device. An “i-telephone” if you are so inclined. I wonder if he has to be the first in line at the bakery when the new bread shows up at 4am. “I want to be the first one to get my hands on the new i-rye!”

Read no further lest ye be lookin’ for spoilers:

I didn’t actually read the whole thing in pirated jpg format (though some did). But I did read the last little bit just to confirm all the internet rumors. Can we say, “Deus ex Elderwandica?” Or is it, “Dumbledore ex Machina?” Either way, JKR certainly wrapped that 7 book series up in a tidy little package at the last minute there, didn’t she? I found the epilogue all together insulting, and I’m not really even a fan. I can only imagine how the scarved and bespectacled crowd must be taking it.

Let me paraphrase:

Epilogue –

Everyone got married and had lots and lots of magical babies. Voldemort still seems to be dead. No further detail is needed.

The End.

DIGG THIS COMIC

UPDATE 7/23/07

Ok, I’ve talked to a few “wand-wielders” this morning and it seems I have judged HP:ATDH:ROTJ too quickly. Assuming one had followed the series with a cult-like fanaticism from it’s inception, apparently the ending is quite satisfying. To be fair, I’ve only seen the movies, which are commonly regarded as the “dry hump” version of the books, and read a few leaked pages and random internet spoilers. An expert on the once and future wizard I am not.

If nothing else, Josh experienced some sort of cathartic plot-resolution-gasm that had been dangerously building pressure for nigh on 10 years.