It’s A Bird, It’s A Plane, It’s An Incredibly Handsome Plane

Whatever crime Josh was being accused of, I’m certain that my testimony only served to strengthen his case. I obviously proved myself a credible witness of sound mind and sound theories about who should play the next Superman [hint: It’s Jon Hamm].

Oh yeah. A little poison space potato told me THE FREAKIN’ EWOK STARE SHIRTS [based on THIS comic] are  IN THE STORE!

Ewok Stare Shirt
More info about the shirt HERE.

Speaking of shirts, the shirt I mentioned in the comic is one I designed for the Sklarbro Country Podcast and yes, Jon Hamm did actually get caught wearing one by the paparazzi. Yep. Boner times all around. If you are a sports and comedy fan I would give SBC a listen. Hell, I don’t even understand sportsballing and I really enjoy it.

Speaking of Podcasts I enjoy and Jon Hamm and Superman and whether or not Hamm is interested in being Superhamm, all of those things are addressed in THIS EPISODE of Never Not Funny with Jimmy Pardo feating Jon “Kal Hamm El” Hamm.

With Great Power Ballads…

You might be saying, “But I’ve never seen the hit practical joke show Prizzanked on the BROtv network.” And you would be right to say that. Prizzanked actually airs on UPN, which stopped being on the TV some years ago. That’s part of why it’s such a good prank.

I honestly believed the Spider-Man musical, Spider-Man: Change The Light Bulb In The Laundry Room Spider-Man: Turn Off The Dark would never actually see the light of day. A series of financial setbacks coupled with the fact that (until now) the universe seemed to be governed by reason left me with the impression that such terrible nonsense would not make it to fruition. Hell, THIS VERY COMIC was founded on the idea that an emo Spider-Man was a mockery of the web-slinger. Now there is video evidence that such a bebangfaced, warbling wall-crawler does in fact star in a very real musical stage play that will be put on for actual human beings to… enjoy?

I guess the possibility still exists that on opening night the crowd will take their seats, the lights will dim, the curtain will rise and some jackhole in a trucker hat will run out and individually punch every person in the theater square in the balls.

Just for fun, here are a few more jabs from the host of Prizzanked to Bono:
“Uno! Dos! Tres! Fourteen! PRIZZANKED!”
“She want lemon? SHE WANT PRIZZANKED!”
“Where the streets have no name, except for that one street PRIZZANKED AVENUE!”
And finally, “Hold me, thrill me, kiss me, PRIZZANK ME! Chump.”

Comment Challenge: Rename Spider-Man: Turn Off The Dark
[Inspired by FB JustChristine who came up with Spiderman: Turn Around Bright Eyes]

Making An X-Ception

I realized recently that I never said anything about Marmaduke. So why not take a commentary about X-Men: First class needing some rewrites due to previously unknown similarities to Inception and just shoehorn that giant fucking dog right in there? It makes perfect (anti)sense. Ahh, but the reference doesn’t fit because the dog is just too darn big. And in that remarkable bigness lies the humour. You can’t see the humor, though.

Because the dog’s so big.

He blocks the joke.

With his bigness.

COMMENTERS: What other scenes is Matthew Vaughn going to have to remove from his X-men reboot for being too similar to another film?

I’ve been making more posts in The Vault recently [behind the scenes on two secret logo projects for big name comedians, a secret t-shirt that may never see the light of day, and the rough sketch of this particular comic (featuring deleted dialog)]. If you want access to all the Vaulty goodness, please consider making a donation. If you REALLY enjoy HE and want to see it continue, how about a monthly donation subscription of $5, $10 or $20? Your donations actually represent about 1/3 of my income from the comic and I rely on them like they were… well, 1/3 of my income. Please know that I appreciate your kindness and generosity immensely.

HijiNKS ENSUE Vol 1 Godspeed You Fancy Bastard @ Topatoco

MY BOOK IS NOW AVAILABLE THROUGH TOPATOCO!
This is excellent news since you can now purchase one of my more popular shirt designs and a book at the same time and save on shipping/hassle.

I’ll be removing personalized artist editions from the store later today (maybe tomorrow) so if you want one ORDER NOW.

Let Your Geek Gavel Fly

Read the article above concerning the ongoing lawsuit between Todd McFarlane and Neil Gaiman regarding the ownership of Medieval Spawn and other derivative characters and pay close attention to how specific the judge got with her comic book nerding.

“Much as defendant [McFarlane] tries to distinguish the two knight Hellspawn, he never explains why, of all the universe of possible Hellspawn incarnations, he introduced two knights from the same century,” Crabb writes. “Not only does this break the Hellspawn ‘rule’ that Malebolgia never returns a Hellspawns [sic] to Earth more than once every 400 years (or possibly every 100 years, as suggested in Spawn, No. 9, exh. #1, at 4), it suggests that what defendant really wanted to do was exploit the possibilities of the knight introduced in issue no. 9. […]

I would have sold my soul to the Devil for a chance to be in the court room and hear those words come from the mouth of an elected appointed official. Also to be granted nearly limitless power in order to have a chance to exact vengeance on all who had wronged me in life. Standard Devil-soul-selling stuff.

Feel free to post other landmark decisions in the comments that Nerd Judge may have tackled. I would also be super happy pants if one of you came up with lyrics for a Macgruber style theme song for Nerd Judge.

Protestlytizing

Leaving on a plane for San Diego Comic-Con in 6 hours. Please post your “geek protest sign” slogans in the comments.

I will have this comic as a special print available at The Topatoco Booth (#1231) in the Webcomics Pavillion. One of the signs is left blank so that I can personalize a slogan for you when you buy the print. It looks like this:

SDCC Protest Print

I’m not going to comment on the WBC protesting comic-con (because it promotes false idol worship) since it will just lead to them getting more attention. Dumb, hateful people are predictably hateful and dumb. Something kind of neat is happening as a result of the protest, though. Check out #godlovesbatman on Twitter [more info here]. Thanks to @melsh for titling the comic.

[skip the rest if you’ve read Monday’s blog post. just some SDCC updates and reminders]

Comic-Con 2010

SAN DIEGO COMIC-CON!

I will be at the Topatoco booth (#1231) in the Webcomic’s Pavilion (just around the corner from Penny Arcade).

I will have a few shirts, my book, various comic prints, a few left over large prints, the special print mentioned above, and a new item:

Sketch Cards! For $5 I will do a quick sketch for you on a nice card that looks like this:

HijiNKS ENSUE Comic Con Sketch Cards

Pretty neat, huh? Sketches in HE books (that you buy) are free, and larger commissioned pieces are priced depending on complexity.

COMIC-CON EXCLUSIVE “Browncoat vs. Red Shirt” SHIRTS!!!

I did a couple of shirt designs for Quantum Mechanix, fine online retailer of various Firefly/Serentiy, Dr. Horrible, Battlestar and Star Trek Merch, that will be exclusively sold at Comic-Con (booth 3251, which is mid-hall, toward the back wall, near the break area) and likely never again. Pick a side and display your colors proudly.

DO YOU WANT A SAN DIEGO FANCY BASTARD MEETUP?

FB’s JustChristine and JonnyAce wants to organize a meetup for sometime during the con. Thursday night I will be at W00tstock. If you are interested make a commentFollow me on Twitter for minute to minute updates as to what’s going on while I’m at Comic-Con.