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My Heart Is A Hate-Filled Pineapple T-Shirt at Sharksplode

NEW HE PODCASTEpisode 83 “Ass Merkins”

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The soaps were scented in various Autobot flavors. Diesel for Optimus Prime, New Van Smell for Ironhide, Lilac for Bumblebee, and High Karate for Jazz.

The events in this comic are 100% true in that they are two half truths combined into one super-truth. The first half come courtesy of the fact that I did find a Transformers themed door hanger from a local church on my front door this week. Pretty sneaky, Jesus.

And the rest of the truth concerns that fact that, while he was not present at the time of the door hanger discovery, this is EXACTLY WHAT IT IS LIKE TO TALK TO DAVID WILLIS ABOUT TRANSFORMERS. Let me be clear: I am not disparaging Willis’s mighty knowledge of all things Cybertron. I marvel at it in fact. I ask him leading questions just to hear him weave his gentle word-music about what Dinobot prefers for breakfast in the US comics vs. the Japanese comics [SPOILERS: It’s Energon in both]. At least a dozen times he has answered questions about the franchise that have plagued me since elementary school. Those of you not privy to his physical being can partake of his robo-knowings at the TF-Wiki, of which he is a major contributor. David has appeared in HE a few other times. Go Read BOTH of HIS COMICS. Love him as he loves fictional robots with silly names.

COMMENTERS: What other 1980’s cartoons or Michael Bay-type movies would make good religious advertisements? Please try to keep it light-hearted and respectful, since I’m sure I’ve already offended plenty for all of us. I think I saw a Thundercats TV spot about not huffing glue one time.


 

You’re The Last Of The Time Lords, Charlie Brown

UPDATE: THE SHIRTS ARE HERE!!!

The Doctor Is In T-Shirt


If you are waiting on your copy of HE Book 2, PLEASE READ THIS!!!

I scoured the Internet, positive that someone had already done this. How, in the grand scheme of pop-culture references, had no one ever put these two ideas together? After doing my due Google image searching diligence, I was confident that had this gag already been explored, it was not on the Internet and thus fair game. I did, however find a few pices of “Snoopy as The Doctor” fan art. Odd.

Also, I KNOW “The Doctor Is In” refers to that football-yanking bitch Lucy and not Charlie Brown. I figured as long as I was taking creative liberties I should go for the gusto.

I suppose had I used Matt Smith’s Doctor as my subject I could have given new meaning to “the little red-haired girl.” Maybe someday I’ll do a follow up.

UPDATE: I put a desktop version of this comic in The Vault.

You're The Last Of the Time Lords, Charlie Brown Wallpaper Preview

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Thundercats Bro Before Thundercats Ho

Preorder HijiNKS ENSUE Book 2!!!ONLY 18 UFE’s LEFT AND ONLY 3days left to get them: There are 18 Ultimate Fancy Editions of the book left and the files must be fully proofed and turned into the printer by Sunday 1/30/2011. Once those last UFE’s are sold I will have covered 100% of the printing costs + all other book-related expenses. PLEASE HELP me make this thing a success. 4 days! We can do it!

Doing Lo-FiJINKS comics for the rest of the week so I can finish up the book WHICH IS DUE SUNDAY AND OMG I AM FREAKING OUT.

I will definitely be watching the new Thundercats animated series, but not (only) because of how far Thunderan cleavage technology has advanced in the last 20 years. Thundercats was my favorite show when it was first airing. I had a multitude of action figured, the Thundertank, and a life size Lion-o suit complete with plastic Sword of Omens and Glove of… Portents? Glove of Mysteries? Power Glove? I don’t remember what it was called, but it was awesome. I think the blend of fantasy and sci-fi really appealed to me. They had spaceships and laser cannons and what not, but there leader was the ghost of Obi-Wan Kenobi portrayed by Jaguar. I think his name was Jag-o, or Jag-off.

I was, however, quite disturbed as a child by the pilot episode referenced in the comic above. Everyone of the Thundercats was complete naked for the nearly the entire episode. Even the kids. And, seeing as how they are basically animals, that probably wouldn’t have registered as odd if they didn’t make a huge deal about, “OK, now we’re at the planet. We should put some clothes on.” It makes me think nudity wasn’t common on Thudera and they were just weirdos. Like the people that make their kids watch them have sex because “it’s natural.” It’s like they were just putting on clothes because the pizza guy was at the door.

I only saw that episode once when I was young, but the memory of it burned in my brain. I was too young to understand if I was aroused by it, so I think my only real reactions were confusion and fear. I had the same reaction to an episode of The Mysterious Cities of Gold where the main character got naked to play in the river. It was a Japanese import, so I’m sure the creators thought nothing of it. Nudity is something Americans are taught to fear and be ashamed of at a very early age and I think it sticks with us throughout life. The rest of the world (literally ALL OF THE REST OF THE WORLD) doesn’t seem to have that same hang up.

“Sword of Omens, give me sight beyond sight… right into Cheetara’s bedroom. Meow.”

Anyway, enough strolling down repressed childhood memory lane.

COMMENTERS: Are you going to check out the new Thundercats? Did you enjoy the original? Post any Thundercats related thoughts below.

How To Train Your Hellhound

“And why is the exposed skull on fire?” is not a question one should have to ask with regards to a children’s film.

All joking aside, Guillermo del Toro is a great choice to help improve Dreamworks animated features. He was all over How to Train Your Dragon and that was a genuinely enjoyable film. It didn’t quite have the adult/child crossover of a Pixar creation but it was probably Dreamworks‘ most well-rounded offering to date.

Though I do think Dreamworks would do well not to stifle Del Toro were he to throw in a few goat-faced demon spawn in the next Madagascar sequel.

Commenters: How else might Guillermo del Toro bring his singular vision to children’s films? Or how might he adapt current animated movies?

You’ve Got A Friend In Me

Friend to HE Jon Rosenberg has a new comic called “Scenes From a Multiverse.” It has pretty pictures and nerdy words. It’s like Goats, but minus the 12 years of continuity to catch up on. You will enjoy it.

Toy Story 3 is the best film of 2010 and the best Pixar film to date. The end.

It was perfect. I don’t care that it’s animated, or aimed at kids or CG or that it has one extra dimension. That movie is a gee-dee masterpiece of story telling. I cried real human-style tears for at least the last 15 minutes.

[Science Fiction TV-Movie Title Generator T-Shirt @Topatoco!!!
There is also a PRINT of this design too!]

SciFi SyFy Tv-Movie Title Generator Shirt

SPOILERS BELOW!!!!!

I’m not going to do a full review, but I do want to list a few things that I especially enjoyed and others that pushed Toy Story 3 past Pixar‘s typical fabulousness and straight into “Best Picture Oscar” territory:

  • The entire opening sequence. I haven’t laughed that hard at another movie this year.
  • The improv toy troop
  • Ken
  • Spanish Buzz. “El Vaquero!”
  • Mr. Tortia Head
  • The incinerator scene. I completely forgot I was watching a cartoon at that point.
  • Lotso’s complete lack of redemption
  • Woody’s realization that he had to let Andy go
  • Andy’s “one last play” with the toys

Buh! I’m starting to mist up again. I better go Watch the first 8 minutes of Up! so I can calm d…BLOOOHOOOO HOOOHOOOO HOOOOHOOOOO!!!!!

Please share your thoughts on Toy Story 3 in the comments. Try to keep SPOILERS to a minimum but be warned that THE COMMENTS MAY CONTAIN SPOILERS!!!!!