COMMENTERS: Please pitch your own Breaking Bad “sPUNoffs.”
The 2013 DIGITAL FANCY SKETCH DRIVE is still going through the end of this week! Check out the details and order yours HERE.
MY WIFE KEEPS MAKING AWESOME STUFF! My wife has a super cool, ultra geeky jewelry shop on Etsy. You can see her Tetris necklace andt the just announced Harry Potter inspired Quidditch necklace. Check out dat Quaffle!
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The HijiNKS ENSUE Store is all new looking and such, and all ladies shirts are $5 off!
COMMENTERS: Ready access to Chinese food: Important hallmark of civilization, or MOST important hallmark of civilization? What else is required? What creature comforts must you live nearby to consider a place livable?
The 2013 DIGITAL FANCY SKETCH DRIVE is still going! Check out the details and order yours HERE.
MY WIFE KEEPS MAKING AWESOME STUFF! In addition to having her own photo restoration business, my wife has also started making super cool, ultra geeky jewelry on Etsy. You can see her Tetris necklace and more geeky creations in her shop, but she just announced her Harry Potter inspired Quidditch necklace. Look at those bludgers!
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Now I want Chow Mein and spring rolls, but we’re having roast.Sigh.
seriously · 96 weeks ago
Split the difference, make Chow Mein out of the roast, and use the sides like your veggies to make spring rolls.
Tyler Green · 97 weeks ago
This is a huge difference. I spent 6 years teaching in China, and every summer when I came back to Canada, my mom always wanted to go for Chinese food at local buffets. Canadian “Chinese” food is just terrible in those buffets, so now that I’m home for good I’m making friends with the cooks to get the real stuff!
Minos · 96 weeks ago
My preferred term for Americanized Chinese food (sweet and sour anything, especially) is “Meat Candy”. Sometimes you want Chinese food, and sometimes you want Meat Candy. It’s nothing to be ashamed of.Last night, in a haze of scotch fumes, I was dwelling on this very concept. “Social media” was one of the hackmalgamated concepts. The others are (thankfully) lost to the mists of time/scotch.…Is that a thing? Time Scotch? Can it please be? Can I drink it with the Doctor? And perhaps the Barrowman? Joel, please, can you dispense wisdom in the form of lines artfully arranged?
I actually can’t stand (American) Chinese food (never had the real deal). For me, Thai and Indian food is where it’s at. I don’t consider easy access to either types of food necessary, however. For me, as long as I have a liquor store nearby, and an internet connection, I’m pretty much sated. The only thing missing from my life currently, which I consider essential,is marijuana. Unfortunately my State doesn’t even have medical marijuana, much less full out legal weed. As the great Carl Sagan once said, “[T]he illegality of cannabis is outrageous, an impediment to full utilization of a drug which helps produce the serenity and insight, sensitivity and fellowship so desperately needed in this increasingly mad and dangerous world.”
Bron · 96 weeks ago
I personally regard hats as being the mark of civilised people, they must be non-douchy ones however (though my definition about hats is basically that if lots of douchbags wear them then they are a douchy hat).Logically this must mean that a civilised society must have hat shops (milleners?).
bron · 96 weeks ago
(it would not let me put it as one post sorry)I also feel that having libraries readily available is also a must.
If you think american chinese food is odd you should try some of the stuff you can get in mid Wales, the home of the chinese chip shop (that is a fish and chip (chunky fries for Americans) shop that also sells chinese food (bonus points if they sell “kebabs”)). I have seen people with absolutely no irony order “sweet and sour pork balls, a saveloy and half n’ half love with mushy peas” (that is battered pork balls (think 80% batter 20% pork) with sweet and sour sauce, a “pork” sausage (I have never been sure if you are supposed to eat the skin or not, I think it might be made of plastic) and half chips (again fries) and half rice (often oddly crunchy but with no clear reason why….) with peas that have been cooked so much they have sort of disolved a little (much better then it sounds trust me)).
Candace · 96 weeks ago
In addition to readily available “Chinese” food, easy access to pizza is crucial. Without delivery pizza, civilization as we know it might just collapse into a Mad-Maxian pizzapocalypse.
KryssLaBryn · 58 weeks ago
High-speed Internet, decent Chinese food, and really good sushi.I suppose good schools and decent neighbours and all that too, but honestly, having lived in both cities and rural areas, I can cope with outhouses and no running water if I can just have decent Internet and good (Americanized) Chinese and really good sushi.
Hey Rob, I’m going to turn our twitter conversation into a comic with you in it. Is that cool? It is? Thanks! You’re such a good and loyal friend.
Special thanks to @Chriurgic, @SvenTSexgore and @PatrickAT who tweeted the punchline at me at almost the exact same moment.
COMMENTERS: When/where have you gone that you were the most cut off from the news and happenings of the rest of the world? Did you feel left out when you got back?
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Spend a week on property at Disney World. Serious Bubble.8 days on a floating oil rig in the Gulf of Mexico without ‘net access, where the guys with control of the TV room remote would only change it from truTV to Faux News, so almost all I saw was staged re-enactments of sting operations (“Southern Fried Stings”, according to Wikipedia) and Sean Hannity. It was acutely painful.
DuckAmuck · 98 weeks ago
Any week (about 10 weeks a year, it seems) without The Daily Show and The Colbert Report.
Sure they do a recap when they’re back, but….
bix · 98 weeks ago
A friend of mine was excavating in a cave in South Africa (we’re archaeologists) when Eyjafjallajökull erupted — he emerged from the cave, got into a car, went to the airport, and expected to be heading home to Heathrow… turns out that he got to spend a week in the Johannesburg airport.I applaud you for spelling out that volcano name, sir.I don’t have to go anywhere. That happens most of the time when I’m at homeSummer holidays home with the kids. I don’t think they need to be soaking up all the horrors of the world so I turn off the news. you know what? Ignorance really is bliss.
Liam · 98 weeks ago
When I was in the Boy Scouts I was on a camping trip in New Hampshire when Paul Reubens was arrested in Florida.1994 Boot camp for the army. When I got out O.J. had killed his wife, a little movie named Forest Gump had crushed the box office and some annoying song by Sheryl Crow was #1 on the radio. It was the most confusing summer i’ve ever had, I didn’t see Forest Gump until about 4 years later.Candace · 98 weeks ago
Cruising in the Caribbean, and no, I did not miss checking email or reading the news one bit.
jiynx · 98 weeks ago
pfft all these people all ‘omg a week without internet and i felt so out of touch with the world!’try being crew on a ballistic missile submarine. you think a week without internet is time-shock when you reconnect? try 3-5 months without even any news headlines…
Kid Kraddick is the only one I know of. Apparently he had massive heart disease and it gave out at a fund-raiser on Saturday.When I was a kid I spent 6 weeks every year at a summer camp in New Mexico. No phone, radio, TV or newspapers… no electronics of any kind allowed on the campus. Although at the time I didn’t really pay any attention to the news either, so it’s not like I was being cut-off from “the outside world” so much as I was being cut off from Zelda, Transformers and Star Trek.As an adult, yeah, I’ve been isolated a few times… When Tiff and I moved from Ft Lauderdale to Virginia, our car broke down in the small town of St Augustine, FL. We only had local news on the TV in the hotel and it took a few days to get the car fixed. It actually turned out to be pretty cool though. St Augustine is a bit of a tourist town and we did some sight-seeing, ate at a cool restaurant across the street and managed to take in a play down the block, which is something we’ve never managed to do at other times.
Every year around Labor Day weekend when I go on a motorcycle run in the high Sierras. No cell phone reception up there – and while the odd bit of news can filter back from someone who drives down the mountain to the nearest little store, it’s not much. I actually kinda dread the day one or all of the major carriers find a reason to extend cell coverage in that area.
lou · 98 weeks ago
My family and I went on a week-long trip to Mexico and had the time of out lives, until we got back, by which time we heard Princess Diana died. Totally blew my mind.
Debs · 97 weeks ago
I was at summer camp as a counselor for both the Bobbitt and Dahmer stories. I thought my dad was making a terrible joke when I came home to visit, and he told me about Dahmer. When the Bobbitt news reached us at camp, it was he source of great discussion and the quote that still makes me giggle.A bunch of counselors were sitting at the ice cream shop in town pondering the Bobbitt situation when one of the boys said, “That must have been a sharp knife.” I thought to myself it must have been to finish the task before he woke up, but another counselor asked for clarification. The first responded by saying, “To cut through the bone and everything.”
Now this led to a great argument about how there was not a bone in the penis, but the ounselor (who was majoring in biology at UC Davis) remained unconvinced and won the debate when he said, “Dude, why do you think they call it a boner.” We could not argue with his logic any longer and left it alone. My only hope is he did not become a teacher or a doctor.
Now whenever I am engaged in an argument with an idiot, I think of that day and manage to walk away with a smile.
Kryss · 97 weeks ago
To be fair, some animals do have a penile bone. But dude, HE WAS A GUY. *Facepalm* How could he possibly not know you can pretty much tie it in a knot when its not erect?! He has one himself! (one presumes).Sheesh…
This is an actual dumb thing that I began doing on my plane ride home from SDCC. BEGAN doing, I said. I did not actually complete the ridiculous act. It’s just that as I was scrolling through my list of soothing sounds in an ill-fated attempt to sleep on the plane (a feat which I have never accomplished in more than a 30ish minute stretch), I remembered that the “Airplane Noise” setting was the most relaxing and sleep inducing. Why is it then, that the actual sound of an actual airplane is probably my very least favorite sound?! I’m looking at you, science! Shouldn’t you have an answer for this? Is it a plane-based conspiracy, like chemtrails? Oh, it is? Never mind then.
TIME FOR ACTUAL TRAVEL TIPS!
1) Noise canceling headphones. My wife got me a pair of these for Xmas or a birthday or somesuch about a year ago, and they rank among my most treasured possessions. I’ve got a rather inexpensive ($80-90) set of noise canceling earbuds (portability was essential for travel) and they have actually changed my life. I find the elimination of engine noise, random chatter and general airplane general cacophony decreases my discomfort during air travel by at least 50%. I have very sensitive ears and all that unfocussed noise was always the aural equivalent of leaky roof dripping directly into my eye. Also the roof is leaking poison. Spicy poison. Notice I say it “decreases my discomfort” rather than “increases my comfort” because the latter would imply that there is a degree of comfort to be had on an airplane other than in first class. There is not. Speaking of…
2) American Airlines Main Cabin Extra. On my plane to San Diego I sat down in my middle seat (WTF, I selected WINDOW!) and noticed that my knees were not touching the seatback in front of me or positioned directly inside my own ribcage. In fact there was a good 12″ of space between my naturally positioned knees and the nearest immovable obstruction. For anyone in or around the 6′ tall range, this is a HUGE DEAL. Every aspect of my 3.5 hour journey was improved by this extra space. I could get to my bag easier, get in and out of the row easier, I didn’t feel as intimately adjacent to my row mates as I normally would in a middle seat and when I leaned the seat back to attempt to sleep, IT ACTUALLY RECLINED! MORE THAN TWO DEGREES EVEN! WHAT WAS THIS SORCERY?! The plane touched down and I immediately tweeted my confused delight regarding the embarrassing amount of legroom to which I, a lowly coach passenger, a thing worse than landing gear failure in the eyes of the airlines, had been gifted with. AA quickly responded via tweet letting me know that I was enjoying “Main Cabin Extra.” I didn’t select this feature or pay any extra for it, and I don’t know if it effected the entire cabin or just a few rows, but let me tell you, tall people, this is a thing that you need in your traveling life. I need to do some research and find out if there’s a way to guarantee the Extra on all my flights from now on, because it was entirely less uncomfortable than the accommodations I am accustomed to.
COMMENTERS: What is your essential travel tip or piece of discomfort decreasing travel gear?
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Melissa · 98 weeks ago
I always pack a change of clothes in my carry on. One person in my group had their luggage lost, and had to hand wash and re-wear the same clothes for several days before the situation was fixed.
Ali · 98 weeks ago
Socks. Even with sandals. Because who wants to wear shoes on a long flight? But you don’t want your bare feet exposed to the random dirt that’s in an airplane cabin, either.Candace · 98 weeks ago
I always carry an inflatable back pillow, because all airplane seats, even business/first class ones, are designed for people about a foot taller than me, and so effectively have no lower back support for me. Since I started this practice, my lower back hurts way less at the end of a long flight than it used to.
Fengor · 98 weeks ago
There’s really just no way for me to ever be comfortable on an airplane, they simply weren’t designed for people in the 5’10” – “Holy shit you’re tall” range. The best I can hope for is an aisle seat so that I can let one of my legs extend fully every now and again during the flight.I recently did fly to and from London with United and discovered that paying the extra cash for “Economy Plus” for five more inches of leg room between seats really did make all the difference. Granted I was still pretty uncomfortable for 8-10 hours in either direction, but at least I didn’t feel like my knees were providing back support for the person in front of me.
I used to do aisle seats for the same reason, then I realized that if you get the window seat and lean into the the curve of the plane, put one foot under the seat in front of you and the other foot under the seat in front of the person in the middle (without bothering them), you actually get more room for the whole flight instead of having to pull your feet back every time a cart rolls by.
Richter · 98 weeks ago
The only issue is this is a tossup – if there were a window for every seat, it’d be fine, but sometimes you end up against the space between windows instead of the window itself – then it’s only different from the aisle because you’re not leaning against some total stranger. I used to make two flights per week.You actually CAN guarantee Main Cabin Extra… for a $50 fee.
Richter · 98 weeks ago
Sorry, meant ‘only different from the middle seat because you’re not leaning against a total stranger’I just look around at how miserable everyone else is looking. I find comfort in that. 😉
dave · 98 weeks ago
I gave up on my window seat experiment because the curvature of the plane means I can’t put my outside leg straight in front of me. Also, usually the seat support is under the seat in front of me, not between the window and middle seats. This, combined with the curvature of the fuselage, means that there is significantly less room for a bag. Aisle seats also suffer from reduced room for a bag and carts rolling by hitting you in the shoulder/elbow; but the middle seat only works if you have someone to cuddle with (personally that means someone I know, maybe some people aren’t so restrictive) in the window or aisle seat.
wwlaos · 98 weeks ago
As someone who is both tall and fat, air travel (or bus travel… damn you to bus hell you rolling sardine cans) is just generally miserable all around. That’s why I drive everywhere whenever it is even remotely an option.
Fletcher · 97 weeks ago
I recently flew quite a bit on the States on holiday. United is kinda dreary and cramped, Air New Zealand’s long-haul flights give loads of room to Business, Economy Plus, and Economy Skycouch passengers, and squeeze everyone else up to make the huge expensive seats fit.By far the best airline I flew on was Southwest – their practice of charging more for first access to seats, rather than for specific seats, means boarding is a bit more of a hassle, but on the other hand it does mean that the space that would be reserved for Business class knees is averaged out across the entire plane, giving everyone an extra inch or two of space. Quite nice!
When you take an iPad out of the bathroom, it’s actually like when you try and take the Holy Grail beyond the seal of the Grail Chamber. Your everything collapses, killing a 500 year old knight and some Nazis then you, Sean Connery and John Rhys-Davies ride off into the desert on horses or camels or whatever. It’s a whole thing.
I will be at San Diego Comic-Con for the 4th year this week! Come see me at the Blind Ferret Booth (#1231) in the Webcomics area. I will have books and shirts, sketches, Lil’ Wil plushies and ??????THE MYSTERY BOX??????!!!! Speaking of books, if you buy HijiNKS ENSUE Vol’s 1 or 2 you’ll get a free mini print featuring my Sharknado sequel posters! More info HERE.
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There have been 4 years this week? That explains a lot.Grammar Dalek · 100 weeks ago
THE GRAMMAR DALEK HAS AN APPRECIATION FOR WITTY CORRECTIONS.
benthorp· 96 weeks ago
Or perhaps, in these times of financial austerity, a look at life at the bottom of the financial ladder, where every loaf counts: “Banking Bread”?
Or a remake of the Monkees, charting life as an up and coming music group – “Breaking Band”?
psuedoname · 96 weeks ago
Weaselspoon · 96 weeks ago
Giffy · 96 weeks ago
James · 96 weeks ago
DeadRobot · 96 weeks ago
mokatz · 96 weeks ago
Nathan deGargoyle · 96 weeks ago
I’ll get me coat – Taxi!
Benjamin Mansfield · 96 weeks ago
Benjamin Mansfield · 96 weeks ago
Mcecny · 96 weeks ago
tzeentchling· 96 weeks ago
@joescreenwriter · 96 weeks ago
Giving up his life of crime, Jesse completes a degree in chemical engineering and takes a job performing controversial natural gas recovery. Watch FRACKING GRAD, Thursdays on AMC.
In a shocking twist, Walt reveals that he has been on a deep undercover assignment for the DEA and Hank. His tale is told in the new web series FAKING BAD.
Walt and Jesse give up cooking meth and go on the run to New York City. They rent a small apartment, where they perform comedy skits. This Spring, enjoy YUCKING PAD.
After his robot dad fails to impress, Walt Jr. runs away to the airport and catches a flight to China. However, an accident in space/time hurls him into the past. Alone, Jr. must learn to survive on the mean streets of the Chinese capital in 1983 as the PEKING LAD. (this one got away from me…)
@BigNed · 96 weeks ago
Gemma · 94 weeks ago
Daemnor · 26 weeks ago
<chortle>