With So Much Drama In The LHC
Alternate title: You Down With LHC?
Post coming later today (assuming the universe is still here).
I’ve been planning an LHC (yeah, you know me) comic for about a month and today seemed like the best time to pull the trigger. Acting under the assumption that there this is still an “is” and the Swiss have failed at their attempt to explode every molecule in our bodies at the speed of light, I’ll go ahead and breath a cautious sigh of relief. I’m all for science. Don’t get me wrong. I’m just more for… being and such.
I have a relative that worked on the Superconducting Super Collider here in TX before the project was shut down and the miles of underground tunnels were converted to miles of ABANDONED underground tunnels. I used to hope that they would get it up in running and I would be able to sneak on on “Family Day” or something and use the machine to shoot a peanut butter sandwich through an orangutan. Seems like they would have an ample supply of both.
I’ve been collecting Large Hadron Collider related links for a few weeks in hopes of making some sense out of any of these “Big Un-Bang” claims that have been floating around the tubertrons. In the end, the only thing that was clear was that “Goatsengularity” is the reason I was put on earth. I have enriched the world and touched each of your lives and now I can return to my stasis pod and sleep for 1000 years or until I am needed again.
A few FB’s made their peace with the world on the eve of it’s destruction.
Here’s the links I mentioned:
- Landmark experiment to unlock secrets of Big Bang could cause end of the world, say scientists in court bid to halt it
- Everything You Ever Wanted To Know About the Large Hadron Collider, via Rap
- COURTS WEIGH DOOMSDAY CLAIMS
- LHC will not destroy the universe in 5 days
- How U.S. Researchers Are Making the Switch to the Large Hadron Collider
- Scientists get death threats over Large Hadron Collider
- “Anyone Who Thinks the LHC Will Destroy the World is a Twat.”
- Large Hadron Collider will not turn world to goo, promise scientists
- The LHC Will Revolutionize Physics. Can it Revolutionize the Internet Too?
- World to end Wednesday
- CERN’s LHC ‘First Beam’ to be broadcast live on Wednesday
- World Doesn’t End on Wednesday, and You Can Watch It Live
- Hawking bets CERN mega-machine won’t find ‘God’s Particle’
- The Large Hadron Collider Will Not Destroy the World Tomorrow, or Ever
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September 10th, 2008 at 7:40 am
GOATSEngularity is a stroke of genius, but "existy" made me laugh even more!
September 10th, 2008 at 7:50 am
Like how excited/pleased Josh is with his goatsengularity!
September 10th, 2008 at 8:21 am
If you look long enough into it… you can see the future.
September 10th, 2008 at 9:17 am
Josh finally has a hole in his body large enough to be f@#$ed by Cloverfield.
September 10th, 2008 at 10:04 am
for the sequel in October when they start colliding things: 2 Hadrons, 1 Black Hole
September 10th, 2008 at 10:30 am
considered it but figured no one is going to be talking about this after the world doesn't/does end.
September 10th, 2008 at 10:30 am
wrong = best most right ever?
September 10th, 2008 at 10:31 am
It is my most brilliant creation. I might retire.
September 10th, 2008 at 10:32 am
You assume right, but upon further reflection I bet most people wont get that so I changed it. Thank you for spending your last moments reading HE.
September 10th, 2008 at 10:32 am
"existy" reminded me of Whedon-speak.
September 10th, 2008 at 10:33 am
faced with a similar situation the real Josh probably would be too.
September 10th, 2008 at 10:33 am
but who would want to? thats gross. If there was money in Goatse's asshole, would you take it?
September 10th, 2008 at 10:34 am
I tagged this post with "josh dies" but I never said how…
September 10th, 2008 at 10:34 am
this is either the highest compliment you could ever pay me or… no its just a compliment.
September 10th, 2008 at 10:35 am
took me a second.
September 10th, 2008 at 11:45 am
Are you sure that's from the LHC and not that Josh just stopped over at Taco Bell for a 24 pack first? I'd think the results would be about the same either way.
September 10th, 2008 at 12:03 pm
The first thing that comes to mind reading your response is "Josh, the Bacon Slayer"
September 10th, 2008 at 12:35 pm
That depends. How much money?
September 10th, 2008 at 12:54 pm
Half of my vocabulary is Whedoning up words.
September 10th, 2008 at 1:03 am
Aww I thought it was so funny with the Swedes comment but I also like the Swiss change so all good. We all know it's the Dutch you have to watch out for.
September 10th, 2008 at 3:33 am
*runs around the neigborhood naked* WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE! WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE! WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE! WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!*starts sying senseless glibberish* *puts a mask and acts like a pyro from TF2* mmmmmF, MMMF, mmf! MMMMmmmfff! *starts f***** random people* WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE! WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE! WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE! AND I CANT DIE VIRGIN!
September 10th, 2008 at 3:54 am
All day today people were shouting that the LHC was gonna kill us, even though I repeatedly mentioned that there's not enough energy on Earth to sustain even a microscopic black hole for more than a trillisecond, or whatever it's called. This comic made me feel slightly better.
Although, in case you're one of the paranoid people, you should check this: http://www.hasthelhcdestroyedtheearth.com/
September 10th, 2008 at 4:11 am
let's just say it did happen. How much time in orgy size would you have between it occurring and getting sucked into it?
September 10th, 2008 at 4:11 am
Looking at the first panel I thought it was something to do with Lost (the shirt resembling Dharma Initiative emblem).
Great comic, I still think Goatsengularity would make a cool shirt, along with tequila waterboarding. Anyway wouldnt that be a fucking epic way to go, planet eaten by a black hole, doomed by science.
September 10th, 2008 at 4:14 am
BTW the panicked look on Joel's face in the last panel is awesome.
September 10th, 2008 at 4:38 am
If they were really worried, why were they just going about their business as usual? Thats pretty damn desensitized.
September 10th, 2008 at 4:56 am
I just laughed so hard that I think I need to change my undies. Anything with goatse as the punchline now-a-days is retro epic.
September 10th, 2008 at 5:03 am
Best. Comic. Ever. Thanks for a great laugh!
September 10th, 2008 at 5:40 am
GOATSEngularity! You were right, that IS the best word ever! Also, I /know/ you've considered making that a real T-shirt.
September 10th, 2008 at 5:49 am
I dunno. Maybe they thought the manager would fire them if they died before finishing those TPS reports?
September 10th, 2008 at 8:46 am
I think this is the first comic tagged "Josh Dies" where Josh is still technically alive at the end of it
September 11th, 2008 at 7:45 am
I was going to say that while RealJoel and RealEli are slightly different from their comic counterparts (one slightly less violent; one slightly less sleepy), RealJosh and ComicJosh are pretty much the same. RealJosh has just confirmed it.
September 10th, 2008 at 8:09 am
Seeing as how the Swiss are extremely neutral…does this mean Canada has some crazy supercolidin' atom asplodin' death machine?
September 10th, 2008 at 9:42 am
Did the micro black hole get Kim Jong Il? He's still missing, right?
September 10th, 2008 at 10:13 am
dude, if the end of the world is coming, it may as well be birthed from my stomach. you're fuckin' right i would play with it.
September 11th, 2008 at 10:46 am
My boyfriend is a physics grad student who until last semester worked for a professor who studies high energy particle physics and is part of the LHC project. All the people going nuts over the LHC have been driving him bonkers. Somebody even tried to hack their server last week. This whole thing has gotten so blown out of proportion. Why do people think scientists are out to destroy the world?
September 11th, 2008 at 12:55 pm
We're alive now, we're not meant to be, thus we are all immortal. I suggest you crazy yanks exercise your right to bear arms and fire live rounds at each other like you're paint-balling, except for real…
September 11th, 2008 at 3:46 am
let me get my sword…
September 11th, 2008 at 6:48 am
LHC webcams, things seem pretty slow there at the moment –
http://tinyurl.com/5tyyq3
September 11th, 2008 at 8:03 am
You thought my comment was funny (tears form) THIS IS THE HAPPIEST DAY OF MY LIFE!
September 12th, 2008 at 8:39 am
I don't think that's panic, I think its glee.
September 12th, 2008 at 3:51 am
The best part was when people started issuing the scientists death threats.
September 14th, 2008 at 11:46 am
but for how long?
September 14th, 2008 at 11:47 am
If you blow up our universe, Im going to kill you.
September 14th, 2008 at 11:47 am
Happy to oblige!
September 14th, 2008 at 11:47 am
From what I here he's been dead for 10 years.
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
"GOATSEngularity" made me LOL =D
November 6th, 2009 at 9:24 am
[...] most recent drama at the LHC has to do with a bird’s bagel bomb causing certain components to overheat. LAME! Get to [...]