The Hobo Code of Honor
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July 14th, 2008

The Hobo Code of Honor

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If the man yer dealin’ with asks for an activated iPhone, he’s gettin’ an ACTIVATED iPhone. A hobo’s word is his bond. So is his switchblade. Wait, that’s a crappy code. I think it’s, “A hobo is only as good as his word, and his word is only as good as his stabbing ability.” No, it’s definitely, “A hobo stabs first and stabs questions later.”

Looks like Apple had some trouble activating all those new iPhone 3G’s and ended up sending people home with iBricks. “Thanks for 7 hours in line, $200 and a 2 year commitment! Here’s a thing that doesn’t work!”

You old school Fancy Bastards may remember “Apple Store Guy” from the EXTREMELY short lived Mac-themed comic I did for Apple Insider.

On a related note, THIS is my favorite comic about Hoboes who are also cats.

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^ 38 Comments...

  1. Kim
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    I ended up filling out the paperwork at the store here in Vancouver on Friday afternoon, then going home to work the rest of the day and wait for the call that my voice plan had been activated and I could pick up the phone. I went back just after 6PM and managed to get the only iTunes activation on-site the entire day. It was awesome.

  2. dram10661
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    Oh man, I remember those apple comics, but it's been a while and I didn't remember reading them on the apple insider site. Austin Powers reference triggered memory relapse.

    Also, when Pete talks I hear Barbosa's voice.

  3. doug5364
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    Panel 2 is FancyBastardTabulous!

  4. iptydafu8334
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    What a brilliant capture of the bourgy cum-douche' manner of the Apple Store staff-member! You've transported me there… the smell, the rarefied aesthetic; the unbridled hope, like EPCOT in 1985.

    Right until they dub Ellen Degeneres over the kids working at the Genius Bar.

    The rusty-red in panel #2 is a little dark. Maybe a deep purple for a late-night rendezvous?

  5. wadmaasi8564
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    We've got "two left feet" as euphemism for "can't dance worth shit." Is "two left hands" a new euphemism for "incompetent fuckhead retail employee?"

  6. aj5558
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    I likes'd the red :<

  7. troy6626
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    Well, now that it's been established that Boxcar Pete so popular, are you going to finally acknowledge that he's the secret 5th Hijinkser and have him on the podcast? Would his Hobo-musk cancel out the Josh bomb that wafts in after Josh drops the kids off at the pool? Would Boxcar Pete answer questions, or just stab Eli for using the same sound effects over and over and over?

  8. Kim
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    I used the promise of the Light Saber app.

  9. doug5364
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    seconded…

  10. hijinksensu5337
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    Hes available for birthday parties, weddings and stabbings.

  11. hijinksensu5337
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    Hello, my name is Boxcar Pete. You killed my father…

  12. hijinksensu5337
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    Thanks! I was pretty pleased when it was all done.

  13. hijinksensu5337
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    "Stabbed!" is his sound effect.

  14. Orf
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    His monocle shows that he is quite the better class of hobo. His washtub smells of rich mahogany no doubt.

  15. aj5558
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    It is win, I'll agree.

  16. aj5558
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    Impressive how Boxcar Pete was able to get the hand free of blood, especially considering how serrated the cut looks.

  17. Kurt S
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    Great comic and I love the blogpost too, "stab first, stab questions later" is soo gonna be my new slogan.

  18. rerun7088
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    I agreed, it'll go down with "It's not just good, it's good enough" as my new slogan to live by…

  19. hijinksensu5337
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    Thanks. I actually edited it to make it more clear that they were being lit by a barrel fire.

  20. hijinksensu5337
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    I brightened it up because i was trying to make them look like they were being lit by a hobo barrel fire, but you were right, the red was WAY too dark.

  21. hijinksensu5337
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    Well, the servers going down wasnt his fault exactly, though he did pay a hefty price for Apple's lack of preparation.

  22. hijinksensu5337
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    its hobo musk that you smell.

  23. hijinksensu5337
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    Fixed that.

  24. hijinksensu5337
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    That should be a shirt… but who could make it?

  25. hijinksensu5337
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    Welcome to the comments, and thanks!

  26. Janell
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    Boxcar Pete is pretty much my hero…

  27. Evelyn
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    The apple guy at the store wasn't going to get very far anyway. He only had 3 fingers on that hand. Maybe the missing one was taken by a rabid marmot some years back or something. Wait a minute…So does Pete….

  28. larnsturt6109
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    Hey, be nice to Apple employees. My roomie still isn't speaking in full sentences. He wanders thorough the apartment like a used corn husk. The lines were just as long today as they have been for the past few day, but they had about a fourth of the staff.

    His store actually sold out of all of their iPhones. The staff nearly cried with relief.

    If anyone needs to be reamed, it's AT&T. Roomie was saying how this big of a failure in services might constitute a breach of contract (it has at the very least soured relations) and mayhaps we'll see a second cell phone sercive pop up sooner than later. So that's fun.

  29. patrickcentral
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    that is actually very creepy – I also heard a gruff Geoffry Rush doing a pirate. What are the friggin' odds?

  30. Evelyn
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    Sorry, about that, no offence meant toward the hardworking retail slaves of Apple. The comment was directed at the detail of the artwork. My condolences to Roomie. I did 6 years in retail untilI I was paroled. It can be Brutal on sale days. May his road be paved with the corpses of his enemies. <Soft warm hug from me>.

  31. kjordan
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    I did too, although I couldn't place whose voice it was in my mind at first.

  32. web_diversi6473
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    this may be the best hijinks ensue ever. oh yeah, it so is.

  33. king_zilch6474
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    You don't need to explain it, man, that voice just goes with that character! Boxcar Pete FTW!

  34. Zuza M
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    "Stab first, stab questions later" – indeed.

    One of my favourite comics, this one.

  35. hijinksensu5337
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    Did you use a switchblade like Pete, or some kind of nunchucks?

  36. hijinksensu5337
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    I DO TO!!!!

    Im my mind he talks like a pirate. I actually have to tone down his pirate speak or it would make no sense for him to be a hobo. Maybe before he took his job as hobo-for-hire, he was a seaman,

  37. deanhatescoffee
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    "This hand's twin" – I love the old-school Irish-ish language.

  38. hijinksensu5337
    February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am

    I just keep writing him like a pirate. I dont even care to wonder why.

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