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Point Break 2: Pointer Broken
Point Break is one of those movies that’s so fucking perfect, so sublime in its idiocy, so saturated with action cliches that it cannot be improved upon. It does not need a sequel. I certainly doesn’t need a Keanu-less, Swayze-less sequel.
Point Break is a “must stop what you are doing and watch when it comes on TNT or TBS or whatever” type of movie.
Do me a favor. Watch Point Break (sober) sometime. Just pay attention and count all the crazy inconsistencies, and plot holes and complete impossibilities in that movie. It boggles the mind. Then watch it again (this time probably not sober) and try NOT to have fun. I dare you.
The guy directing it was also the director for Speed (yay!), Twister (meh!) and Tomb Raider 2 (horf!).
Dear Hollywood Jeebus, please abort this movie fetus before it can shit its deadly venom on little orphan children (this is how it feeds). And please drown all men responsible for its conception in boiling vats of their own bile and testicle blood. Amen.
Tags: movies, point break 2
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February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
Ever seen "Hot Fuzz"?
Ever shoot your gun up in the air and go AAAAAH!!!?
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
Hey man, TombRaider 2: Cradle of Gerard Buttler's Monster Package, was a Fantastic movie! Point Break? -I've heard of it, but figured it was about an autistic joining a debate team.
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
SURF NINJAS!
Anyway… I was saving this question for the sack but eff-it – Donnie Darko 2… WHY?!
http://www.moviesonline.ca/movienews_14666.html
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
It's that as well, just go and watch it…
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
Do you watch Myth Busters? They did half an episodes of skydiving myths, just from one scene of that movie. The tested: can you talk to someone while skydiving (no, too much noise); can you catch up with another skydiver who has a 15-second head start (possibly, if you started high enough, but it would be very very difficult); can you free-fall for 90 seconds jumping from a plane at only 5000ft (no, there is nowhere near that much time).
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
Ha! I saw this bit of news yesterday and was equally flabbergasted. A sequel to Point Break is about as necessary as Starship Troopers 3 (which is also in the works, so I hear…. sad). Also, I felt the same way about Donnie Darko 2…. any sequel to that will never be as good as the original. I'm sure it will end up as a cheesy teen horror-type movie, perhaps on par with a Sci-Fi Original movie. Double sad.
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
The second half of that movie made up for the boringness of the first half and was rather excellent if you go in with lowered expectations, or myself who saw it without knowing what it was even about…
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
We need more Buddy Cop Comics up in here…if just to see Chief Eli again…
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
We gonna jump or jerk off?
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
You forget that Hollywood is, in it's heart of hearts, a complete whore. In fact, it's pretty upfront about its promiscuity and whorishness. It's also pretty much going broke. The WGA strike really did cripple the industry, and studios will do anything and everything to get money. This includes milking any and every cash cow they can breath new life into, no matter how old and decrepit.
Be on the look out for Fried Green Tomatoes 2: Jessica Tandy's Voodoo-Induced Return To The Big Screen!
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
Never be as good as the original? It had no hope of ever achieving that feat. It will rape the original and become a surrogate stain on modern film…
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
They need to hire Renny Harlin to direct the movie and he needs to return to his Deep Blue Sea and Last Kiss Goodnight days of insanity.
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
You sound like a man who hasn't heard of Point Break LIVE!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Point_Break_Live!
http://myspace.com/pointbreaklive
The role of Keanu Reeves is played by an audience member picked at random each night, who has to read his/her lines from cue cards.
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
Whoever came up with that is a genius.
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
That's precisely how I recommend it to people – "Just don't give up on it during the first half, and it gets really good"
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
Weekend At Bernie's 3 – starring Heath Ledger.
Too soon?
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
There was a Starship Troopers 2? Oh God, the humanity…! (although I would like to MST3K it like we did the first one. And don't get my husband started on the missing atmo jump suits…I would prefer to keep my ears from bleeding again.)
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
what about speed 3?
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
hahahahahahaha!
Not too soon at all!
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
You're not the first to jump off that ledger…
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
oh yeah, it went straight to dvd. i about had a heart attach when i saw it at hollywood video.
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
Because Hot Topic is loosing sales to common sense and they need something sequely and gothy to market.
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
It'd be much more efficient if they replaced him with a brick and a tape recorder.
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
Hot Fuzz was a love letter to Point Break and it was fantastic.
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
Keanu isn't austistic (because that would make him good and math or something). Im pretty sure he's just plain retarded.
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
We discuss it for about 3 seconds (which or more than it deserves) in podcast 14. I'll have it uploaded soon.
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
As soon as they announced the Ep I set the tivo. It was glorious.
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
But Casper Van Dien is back!
ROUGHNECKS!@!!!!!
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
He's too old for this shit.
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
Now I want to see "Weekend and Batman's"
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
LKG was my intro to Samuel L. It was the beginning of a beautiful relationship, built on trust and respect until Phantom Menace.
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
Fuck me. I have never seen anything as good as this in my life.
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
Minus the tape recorder.
Fuck. Minus the brick.
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
Was there one?
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
Efffff Beeee Eyyyyyyye!
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
Damn right you will…
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
I… Can't act…
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
I can't really fault him for the Star Wars prequels. Being in episodes I-III meant something when he signed on for them. Nobody knew of the shitstorm that would ensue. I would've signed up too without reading a script circa 1998 if Lucas had approached me to be in a new Star Wars trilogy.
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
I totally thought that panel 3 was more of a HF reference than a PB one. I love Nick Frost.
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
I actually saw it having been told that it's basically a send-up of all those cheesy cop movies. Granted, I'm severely indifferent to those types of movies, I still saw it and now it's one of my favorites ever.
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
Whoa… just whoaaa…
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
Which means he's probably good for another 20 years or so.
February 5th, 2009 at 11:36 am
For all we know he was only in Episode One. The rest very well could have been CG.