2 Girls, 1 Cup, 6 Senses
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December 3rd, 2007

2 Girls, 1 Cup, 6 Senses

I was first “Goatse‘d” back in the year Nineteen hundred and Ninety Nine, followed shortly by a rousing “Tubgirl‘ing.” I was in intensive care for 3 months. Another 18 months of recuperative therapy and I had almost regained my vision and ability to comprehend language. You see, my brain had simply refused to go on. “Game over, man. Game over. I quit,” says my brain. I would have taken a holiday too if I’d been in his shoes.

That was traumatic, but apparently not EXTREME enough for today’s hip internet youth. Now they have to Rickroll each other into watching some sort of girl-on-girl fecal fetish video that reminds me of the soft serve machine at The Golden Coral. What’s wrong with the youth of this internet.

Here’s me as an old man on a porch,

“In my day we showed our friends still pictures… JPEGs of men with gaping anuses. We didn’t have these online moving pictures to torture anyone with. We’d IM somebody with “Hey, check out this hottie,” then we’d send him a link to a picture of a girl in a bath wearing a stocking on her head and geysering a shit fountain into her own face. It was a simpler time.”

As far as memes go, 2 girls 1 cup is a great way to close out 2007. Let’s go ahead and put a moritorium on memes for the rest of the year. Let’s ride this one out into January, then get back together as a group and decide if we want any more. The same process that brought us Laugh Out Loud Felines, has also caused me to know what it looks like when women that have been eating shit throw up on each other. That’s unacceptable, internet. You should know better.

I guess the guy that “directed it” is in trouble. All I know is Jacky needs to talk to somebody.

Also, “2 girls, 1 cup” sounds like a great name for a lesbian coffee shop.

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^ 20 Comments...

  1. AJ

    You think that’s terrible? Have you seen John Meyer’s parody of it? *shudders*

  2. JC

    My friends and I are of the firm opinion that there is no real poop in that video… it’s all stunt poop. Fauxces, if you will. I don’t know about anybody else, but I have *never* seen poop that looked like fresh whipped cream, with just a hint of chocolate.

    Now, all the puking and such is gross- but with an adequately cleaned colon, two girls sharing a cup of piping hot soft-serve fauxces is certainly a lot less gross.

    I anxiously await full documentation on this, as it will help to settle a bet I have with one of my associates.

  3. Joel

    @AJ
    Ive read what youve written 6 times. I still cant make sense of it so im going to stop trying.

    @JC
    Im with you. I smell something rotten and its not poop. Its more like chocolate mousse. Also “fauxces” is the funniest thing Iver ever heard. You win the comment contest.

  4. AJ

    @ Joel

    Yeah, John Mayer made his own video called “2 Guys 1 Cup”.

  5. revjim.net :: Blog Archive :: Daily 12/04/2007

    [...] of Photography as an artform and what the future might hold for it. - post by revjim2 Girls, 1 Cup, 6 Senses by HijiNKS ENSUE – a geek webcomic  AnnotatedOne possible effect of tricking your friends into watching the latest [...]

  6. etho

    Every time I hear about this kind of thing, immediately some world leader pops into my head and I wonder if they have seen the video in question. Has Vladimir Putin ever been Goatse’d? Has Cheney ever TubGirl’ed Bush? Actually, I’m pretty sure Bush would be the guy in the office that would send TubGirl to all his friends.

    Y’know what’s fun? Go on message boards and say things like “I think I’m the only person in the world that has never seen Goatse.” Then see how fast the link shows up. Bonus points if someone gets banned for posting it.

  7. Joel

    @Etho
    Im pretty sure Cheney is the one behind the camera in the bathroom with TubGirl. That crazy asshole.

  8. jovin6

    May or not have been real poop, but this sort of thing definitely is done with real poop in private, and at least some films do show the real thing (for example, swap.avi looked more convincing).

    To be honest, I’m actually quite upset that selling these types of films is illegal in the US. For a country that considers itself a bastion of freedom, we’re clearly still battling some pretty senseless paternalism.

  9. whiskey

    So, the Griffin Grandpa was right…
    Ok i wanted to show you the clip… but here’s the next best thing (jeez) http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Holy_Crap

  10. Dean

    @ comment #3: Shit, there was a comment contest?

    This is the most frightening HE I’ve read. I didn’t understand the context of the subject matter until I read the post, so the comic alone definitely has a genuine creep factor.

  11. Joel

    @jovin
    There will be no discussion of swap.avi anywhere near this comic. (oh shit here comes the google bot to index my site for swap.avi! RUNNNNNN!)

    @Whiskey
    I loved that one. I also love how Peter’s father says his name, “Payyter!”

    @Dean
    I suppose taken totally out of context this strip would make negative sense. Taken in context it only makes 1/3 sense.

  12. honest ape

    Just reading your explanation made me vomit in my mouth. And my wife is still mad at me for showing her what a Goatse was. So I avoid shit like this like the fucking plague.

  13. Tye The Czar

    Me too, oy. Me too. That’s why I stay off of 4chan’s /b/ imageboard to avoid risks. /a/ is my thang, oy.

  14. Joel

    @Tye
    Im not real familiar with 4chan other than the fact that I know I can do without it and still live a happy healthy life. Most of your darker corners of the intertubes can only serve to breed pestilence and sadness.

  15. whiskey

    Upon revisiting the comic i discovered what must be obvious to the rest of you…. Sixth sense reference FTW!!!

  16. Joel

    @Whiskey
    Maybe too much whiskey?
    I dont want to spoil anything but Joel is dead for the rest of the strip. he just doesnt know it.

  17. nathan

    after reading this post, i clicked several links, and was directed to “lolcats”.
    thanks to YOUR post, i just spent the last 15 minutes looking at photos of cats/kittens in straange positions with clever quotations around said photos.

    .. and i’m not sure whether to thank you, or curse you in such a manner that would result in a. your accidental massacre-ing of everyone you have ever cared about or b. your condemnation to the fiery pits of oompa loompa land. things have never been the same since the man with the hat, arrived..

  18. Joel

    If the only thing this comic ever does is teach one person about LOL Cats then it was all worth it.

  19. Corey

    You obviously have not seen the picture/story combo of Lotus Boob. I shit you now, messed me up for 3 months.

  20. hijinksensue

    in know what you meant, but "I shit you now" is my new catchphrase.

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