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The $100 iPhone Rebate’s on the Dresser, Chocolate
Uncle Steve is a stone cold pimp. Sure, you’re used to seeing him in black turtle necks and bluejeans, but I assure you his weekend attire consists of a purple and green suede suit, alligator boots (with the pointy toes), a cane with a giant diamond for a handle and a feather in his pimp hat. Imagine Archishop Don “Magic” Juan but whiter and a billionaire.
If he’s “Daddy,” then who’s turning the tricks? You are. I am. Josh certainly is. As I mentioned before, Josh was a day one iPhone adopter (when you can’t conceive, adoption is an honorable alternative). So for being a well behaved be-itch, Daddy will give him a $100 gift card. I hope he uses it to buy cancer.
Now that the price us $200 tastier, I am expecting Santa to leave a pair of iPhones under the tree this year for the wife and I. In return I will leave him a bottle of bourbon and assorted asian and shaving themed pornographies.
This is the plan assuming the 3g 16gb iPhone rumor turns out to be bunk. Either way, I know that as soon as I activate mine Steve will announce a new one with GPS, DVR, video conferencing, no contract, and the ability to grant 3 wishes all for $60. Two months later he’ll drop it to $40, add 2 extra wishes and a 3-way feature (and I don’t mean “calling”).
Tags: apple, iphone, mac, steve jobs, tech
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September 10th, 2007 at 7:54 am
Yes yes, come over to the darkside, join AT&T. My unlimited mobile minutes grow more powerful by the day!
September 10th, 2007 at 8:16 am
Also, I replied to your e-mail with some good mailing list managers.
September 10th, 2007 at 8:34 am
@Roadhead
Hey hey! Its good to see you (read you) here. “Look at that blue, swirly logo-ish moon”
“Thats no moon!”
@MKR
Thanks! I will definitely check them out.
September 10th, 2007 at 10:06 am
Heh… I feel for Josh, I really do.
I don’t know if it’s good or bad that I’m locked into a 2-year contract with Sprint, but I’m not gonna be going to AT&T anytime soon (not with the hefty contract termination fee and deposit to start a new contract with them).
September 10th, 2007 at 10:07 am
“So for being a well behaved be-itch…”
“He-bitch” works just as well in that sentence. (Credit to Deuce Bigalow)
September 10th, 2007 at 10:25 am
[...] Something to lighten your dreary Monday morning, perhaps? A geek comic strip called HijinksEnsue has posted its hardy har har take on Apple’s decision to recompense iPhone users with Apple Store credits, or whatever they’re doling out to us. [...]
September 11th, 2007 at 8:26 am
@AJ
Im pretty sure any carrier would have the same fees. They dont make it easy to switch because they crave your delicious monies.
@Asian
I thought that was really clever until I read “Deuce Bigalow.” Now Im just depressed.
September 11th, 2007 at 9:57 pm
Sprint Guy: Mmmmm… AJ’s monies *aughghhahahghghh*
September 12th, 2007 at 6:06 pm
‘I hope he uses to buy cancer.’
Nice.
I think Jaundice would be cool, too. Josh would look cool in a Simpson’s yellow.
September 14th, 2007 at 6:40 pm
@matthew
You made me realize there was a typo in there. Fixed!
I suppose he could use it to buy a tan.
October 5th, 2007 at 3:02 pm
[...] is: Apple Insider Comics. A.I. approached me about doing a comic series for them after reading my iPhone Rebate comic. Have a look and drop me a line with your feedback. This should be [...]